Almost Certainly Not

THE PLATFORM is an audio play adaptation by author and filmmaker Dan Lauer of Chris Marker's seminal 1967 French film "La Jetée" which serves as the basis for the film "12 Monkeys." The following rules were set for the adaptation by Dan Lauer: He must speak all the dialogueHe may only use sound effects and music included in Final Cut Pro X (no downloads)He may not add anything to the plot to elaborate or clarifyThe final product may not be longer than 25 minutes Watch the original: https://www.amazon.com/Jetee-H%C3%A9l%C3%A8ne-Chatelain-Davos-Hanich/dp/B00E7ND9GI Purchase Dan Lauer's debut memoir POST MERIDIEM: https://www.amazon.com/Post-Meridiem-Unreliable-Madness-Angeles-ebook/dp/B0CC4HQR9R/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr= Dan Lauer is on threads: https://www.threads.net/@danwlauer

"The stabbing horror of life is not contained in calamities and disasters, because these things wake one up and one gets very familiar and intimate with them and finally they become tame again. No, it is more like being in a hotel room in Hoboken let us say, and just enough money in one's pocket for another meal." -- Henry Miller MUSIC: Slow Burn & Just As Soon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Leyla makes her triumphant return, while Dan drinks too much (for these days), shares too much and points to the sky, saying: "The sun's not yellow, it's chicken!" MUSIC: Slow Burn & Just As Soon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

No update today. Just a thing I wrote. I don't remember when and cannot say why. It's called "Mrs. America".

Yeah, I was in the right! Yes, absolutely in the right! I certainly was in the right! Yeah, I was definitely in the right; that geezer was cruising for a bruising...Yeah. Why does anyone do anything? I don't know, I was really drunk at the time... MUSIC: Slow Burn & Just As Soon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

For the first time in a long time Dan does an episode solo. He doesn't like it. This, actually, should be considered a spinoff called "Maybe Certainly Not." Regardless, Dan has some updates about what is going on, upsides, downsides and progress, slow that it may be. Never fear, Leyla will return in episode 6. MUSIC: Slow Burn & Just As Soon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

O judgment! thou art fled to brutish beasts, And men have lost their reason. Bear with me; My heart is in the coffin there with Caesar, And I must pause till it come back to me. MUSIC: Slow Burn & Just As Soon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

On Thursday, 23 January 2020 at 9:54 PM EST Leyla received a text message originating from Dan's phone number requesting that she call if available. She was and did. In the 13 years that Dan and Leyla have known each other Dan has never once made that request. He still hasn't to this day. MUSIC: Slow Burn & Just As Soon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Leyla is very gross in a lot of ways. Dan is very antisocial in every conceivable way. Leyla calls Dan a psychopath more than once. It turns out that Dan's imaginary friend made an appearance on the last episode and neither Dan or Leyla were aware of it. And much, much more, none of which is repeatable in polite company. MUSIC: Slow Burn & Just As Soon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Dan has had a very bad week, having lost much of his forward momentum and comes to some important, but difficult realizations that he and Leyla explore. Leyla still knows absolutely nothing about The Beatles. And the "breakfast" mystery is solved...kind of. MUSIC: Slow Burn & Just As Soon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Leyla helps Dan solve a mystery. Dan discovers what breakfast is really all about. Leyla doesn’t want to get in touch with college Leyla for a variety of reasons. Dan relates multiple disquieting tales related to his mental health…but what else is new? MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

WARNING: The contents of this episode may be disturbing or frightening to some listeners. This is not an enticement or a teaser. This is true. However, the audio is being released, in it's entirety, in order to maintain the goal and reason for the existence of this podcast: to illuminate and to tell a very specific story. MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The question time tables get turned on Leyla, much to Dan's delight. While Dan expounds on his tortuous thought process, particularly with regards to breasts. He also recites a poem. MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Dan makes some new, shocking revelations about that part of himself that shall not be named. Leyla asks Dan absolutely anything, in addition to taking on all social media responsibilities for the show because of Dan's ineptitude. Leyla has a pulled groin, but powers through heroically. Both horror and hilarity ensue. MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

"Did you miss me?" -- Jim Moriarty MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The show takes a turn for the better with the addition of the one and only Leyla Lawrence as a permanent co-host, helping to add a voice of reason to a show that typically contains anything but. We cover previous episode reactions, my treatment progress and complications therein and, believe it or not, we dip a toe in Me Too. MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

The saga continues with guest Leyla Lawrence. Things get personal. Things get complicated. Things get serious. Things get fucking ridiculous. MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

There are many words one could use to describe me. Misanthrope. Curmudgeon. Loner. Prick. Asshole. And they’d be right. But a word not often associated with me, is friend. You, dear listeners, would likely not disagree. And you’d be right, more often than not. But not always. My first guest ever on the show is appearing, in part, to prove that. She is a commercial, film and television actress, a national voice over artist and a performer at Orlando area theme parks. Please welcome, to Almost Certainly Not: Leyla Lawrence. MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Kernel Panic: a safety measure taken by an operating system upon detecting a fatal error in which it either is unable to safely recover or cannot have the system continue to run without having a higher risk of major data loss. Panic Attack: a sudden episode of intense fear or anxiety and physical symptoms, based on a perceived threat rather than imminent danger. MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Memory is a funny thing, especially when yours no longer works properly. The worst part about not remembering something is that you can't remember that you can't remember. I explore this and more, in depth, in today's episode. MUSIC: Slow Burn Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/