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The Marriage Podcast for Smart People

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With over 1,000,000 downloads...we have the research, the truth, and the answers you're looking for. You’re not satisfied with your marriage. You’re afraid of ending up alone--but married. Or maybe you fear losing your marriage entirely. Look, we know how tough marriage can be but, like you, we believe marriage should be forever. Many have told us that these weekly shows have helped them to create a marriage they love today and they’re going to treasure for a lifetime. You can see their comments in our reviews. Listen, you don’t have to be unhappy in your marriage. Or alone. Or even considering divorce. Start your marriage towards enjoyment and security today: first, subscribe to our podcast. Second, get our worksheets and other bonus content via Patreon. Third, build a thriving, passionate marriage! Who are we? Caleb has his Master of Arts in Marriage and Family Therapy and brings you solid, research-based marriage advice once a week through this show. Verlynda keeps his two feet firmly planted on planet Earth! Together, we bring you The Marriage Podcast for Smart People from OnlyYouForever.com.

With over 1,000,000 downloads...we have the research, the truth, and the answers you're looking for. You’re not satisfied with your marriage. You’re afraid of ending up alone--but married. Or maybe you fear losing your marriage entirely. Look, we know how tough marriage can be but, like you, we believe marriage should be forever. Many have told us that these weekly shows have helped them to create a marriage they love today and they’re going to treasure for a lifetime. You can see their comments in our reviews. Listen, you don’t have to be unhappy in your marriage. Or alone. Or even considering divorce. Start your marriage towards enjoyment and security today: first, subscribe to our podcast. Second, get our worksheets and other bonus content via Patreon. Third, build a thriving, passionate marriage! Who are we? Caleb has his Master of Arts in Marriage and Family Therapy and brings you solid, research-based marriage advice once a week through this show. Verlynda keeps his two feet firmly planted on planet Earth! Together, we bring you The Marriage Podcast for Smart People from OnlyYouForever.com.
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United States

Description:

With over 1,000,000 downloads...we have the research, the truth, and the answers you're looking for. You’re not satisfied with your marriage. You’re afraid of ending up alone--but married. Or maybe you fear losing your marriage entirely. Look, we know how tough marriage can be but, like you, we believe marriage should be forever. Many have told us that these weekly shows have helped them to create a marriage they love today and they’re going to treasure for a lifetime. You can see their comments in our reviews. Listen, you don’t have to be unhappy in your marriage. Or alone. Or even considering divorce. Start your marriage towards enjoyment and security today: first, subscribe to our podcast. Second, get our worksheets and other bonus content via Patreon. Third, build a thriving, passionate marriage! Who are we? Caleb has his Master of Arts in Marriage and Family Therapy and brings you solid, research-based marriage advice once a week through this show. Verlynda keeps his two feet firmly planted on planet Earth! Together, we bring you The Marriage Podcast for Smart People from OnlyYouForever.com.

Language:

English


Episodes

OYF217: Coming to Terms With Your Unexpected Pregnancy

1/16/2019
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Did you know that one-third of all childbirths in the USA are as a result of unexpected pregnancies[i]? Now: that is not necessarily unexpected with regards to married couples — that’s just unexpected across the entire population so that’s in any relational context. Still, it’s a huge percentage. Unexpected Pregnancy Woes and Blessings There is quite a variety of ways unexpected pregnancy can affect a couple: both positive and negative[ii]: Reduced mental health (especially for the mother)...

Duration:00:18:54

OYF216: Relational OCD

1/9/2019
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Today we’re going to be looking at relational obsessive-compulsive disorder — a condition that I was only made aware of in the last year first through a friend. Relational Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is a sub-type of OCD in which a person experiences “obsessive preoccupation, doubt and compulsive behaviors focused on one’s romantic partner[i]”. People with this condition report uncontrollable thoughts or obsessions about their relationship to their romantic partner and this can be very...

Duration:00:23:11

OYF215: How And When To Tell Your Wife About Your Porn Addiction

1/2/2019
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When I work with married guys who want to break their porn habit they generally fall into one of two categories. Either their wife already knows or else she has no idea at all. I don’t think I’ve ever worked with a husband whose wife knows but doesn’t care if he stops or not. In any case, if you’re in that latter category and you know you need to disclose this problem to your wife then today’s episode is for you. Let me just say right off the bat that over the last 10 years the number of...

Duration:00:30:29

OYF214: Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and the Impact on Marriage

12/26/2018
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The Adverse Childhood Experiences study was a huge research study conducted in the USA that has traced the impact of very difficult childhood experiences into adulthood. For those who have faced these challenges, we want to explore what the potential impacts are in marriage and how to best respond so that you can create or keep a happy, content marriage. Adverse Childhood Experiences The ACE study wanted to explore the effects of childhood abuse and neglect on later life. It included over...

Duration:00:17:32

OYF213: Couples Living With Extended Family

12/19/2018
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In the US, living with extended family is increasing. 31% of children in the US now live with at least one additional adult in the house, as well as their parents- normally a family member. 10% live with one or both grandparents in the house[i]. Let’s take a look at some of the benefits and challenges this brings to marriage and how to make the most of it if you do have family living with you. Living with extended family is becoming more common in the USA, probably in Canada as well, but in...

Duration:00:17:28

OYF212: Working Through Betrayal Trauma

12/12/2018
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Discovering that your spouse has had an affair or has in some way been sexually unfaithful is often an extremely traumatic event. You’ll feel like the boundaries of your marriage have been violated, your trust in your spouse has been destroyed, and even your own identity has been shaken. Betrayal As Trauma The first thing we want to do is just confirm that a betrayal can represent trauma. Trauma has been happening since the dawn of time, but as a psychological concept, I think the Vietnam...

Duration:00:21:16

OYF211: Is Your Own Sexual History Dragging You Down?

12/5/2018
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Sometimes sexual guilt can be a real drag — acting like a wet blanket not only on your sex life with your spouse but also even dampening the joy you find in your marriage. And most Christian couples don’t feel like they can just throw off their moral boundaries in order to bypass the guilt. So it’s easy to get stuck. Today we want to help you get unstuck. Sexual History and Guilt If you feel that in some way, at some time, you have violated “proper” sexual conduct then you are likely...

Duration:00:21:53

OYF210: Things To Think About Before You Start Making Babies

11/28/2018
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So the transition from just the two of you into a family is a big one! I know when we were wondering about starting a family it was really challenging to try to think through all the things one should be aware of. Well, we want to take away some of the mystery today and help you make an informed, prepared decision so that you can move into this new phase of marriage with greater confidence and awareness of what lays ahead. It’s Common Not to Feel Ready Actually, less than half (44%) of...

Duration:00:22:57

OYF209: Betrayed by Your Husband? 5 Things You Need to Know

11/21/2018
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You have just discovered your husband's pornography addiction or the other woman. Your safe world or life as you know it has shattered/come crashing down. We want to provide you with some essential truths and tips/strategies for coping with this sudden devastation and also talk about what you can expect of yourself in the moments and days immediately following betrayal. Today I’m happy to introduce you to Sharon Snooks. Sharon is an Associate Therapist here at OnlyYouForever. She is a...

Duration:00:26:14

OYF208: How Your Theology Impacts Your Sex Life

11/14/2018
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Today we’re exploring the intersection between theology and our sex lives as married couples. These may sound like very disparate topics, but in reality what you believe about God, and what you think the Bible says about sex, will have a big impact on how much - or how little - pleasure you get from God’s great gift of sexuality. This particular episode was recorded when Verlynda was recovering from pneumonia, so it is a conversation between Caleb Simonyi-Gindele and Jesse Schellenberg. A...

Duration:00:34:24

OYF207: Four Ways To Create More Intimacy In Your Marriage

11/7/2018
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Today we revisit the topic of creating more intimacy in your marriage. This is actually a replay of episode 108. We don’t normally do replays but Verlynda is in the hospital with pneumonia today. I am glad to say that she is recovering, but, boy does that pneumonia ever hit hard. So, please keep her in your thoughts and enjoy this show from a couple years ago. If you really want to build more intimacy in your marriage – and who wouldn’t??? – here are four ways to do that. Take the time to...

Duration:00:20:15

OYF206: The Top 10 Rules for Fair Fighting

10/31/2018
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Every marriage has conflict. As we often point out, it is not so much how often you fight, but rather what you do when you fight and afterward. Do you repair after conflict? Do you work together during conflict to get to the bottom of issues? Today we have 10 Rules to help you fight fairly. Fair Fighting Since we have so much emotionally and relationally at stake in a marriage, I think it is easy to forget that we need to be decent towards each other when we fight. In the Bible, Proverbs...

Duration:00:30:49

OYF205: A Husband’s Guide to Ejaculatory Control

10/24/2018
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According to one source, 75% of men ejaculate within two minutes of penetration. At the request of one of our patrons, we went into the research literature to see if this time period could be extended. Not surprisingly, 88% of men have some concern over ejaculating too quickly and almost all men (99% in one study) use some kind of strategy to delay ejaculation. So if it’s something that basically all men worry about, is there anything that can reliably help? A Quick Primer on Ejaculatory...

Duration:00:18:48

OYF204: How To Break Out of The Same Old Arguments

10/17/2018
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The same old arguments … the same old cycle. In the marriage counseling world, we call these negative interaction cycles. The topic or concern or issue may change but it’s usually the same pattern: one spouse is more demanding or trying to get a response and the other avoids or dismisses or withdraws. And then it escalates from there. Today, we’re going to help you get started on breaking out of this pattern! The Three Cycles There’s really just three kinds of cycles. The most common is...

Duration:00:25:03

OYF203: About Showing Honor To Your Wife (1 Peter 3:7)

10/10/2018
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There are a constellation of marriage-promoting behaviors packed into the Biblical instruction for husbands to honor their wives. Today, we’re launching from a simple phrase in the Bible that instructs husbands to show honor to their wives to demonstrate how a host of research-backed findings are encapsulated in this truth. Our podcasts are not sermons — I am a professional marriage counselor, but in serving my church community and affiliation I do get involved in a fair bit of preaching....

Duration:00:20:26

OYF202: I Am a Virgin and My Fiancee is Not

10/3/2018
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One of the concerns that often comes up in premarital counselling is from a couple where there are different amounts of sexual experience. Even apart from the moral concerns this may prompt are the fears, uncertainties, and doubts of what sexual intimacy may look like when you get married. For those of you that are new to this podcast, Verlynda and I are born-again believers but I’d say we are the non-judging variety, and we come to marriage with the belief that it comes as a gift from God,...

Duration:00:21:51

OYF201: Infertility And Its Impact on Marriage

9/26/2018
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Infertility is the inability to conceive a child after at least 1 year of trying. Turns out about 10% of US couples experience infertility, and of those, about half will eventually conceive while the other half remain permanently infertile[i]. That’s actually a pretty high number: 1 in 10 couples struggle with this issue, 1 in 20 permanently face it. Challenges of Infertility As anyone who is going through this themselves will know, infertility can be a hard thing to live with. I want to...

Duration:00:19:26

OYF200: How Working from Home Impacts Your Marriage

9/19/2018
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Are you working from home, or thinking about working from home? In today’s episode, we want to show you how working from home could be a real positive for your marriage — but there are a few potential downsides that you need to be aware of too. I’ve been working from home for a few years now, and Verlynda has been for much longer than I so we found this research pretty informative. So does being in the home more help your marriage, or make things harder? Basically, the research suggests that...

Duration:00:26:02

OYF199: Do You Compete With Your Spouse?

9/12/2018
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Competing with your spouse: is it good, is it bad? Or like us — if you’re playing mini-golf — it’s just plain ugly! At least, as ugly as Caleb’s putting skills… Oh…snap! For some couples, competitiveness is just a bit of fun: even though it may feel like life or death when you’re at the final hole of the mini-golf course, it doesn’t really have much impact on your marriage. But for others, competitiveness is more of a lifestyle thing: you’re trying to compete with each other in all areas of...

Duration:00:22:04

OYF198: Why a Child Centred Family is Bad for Everyone

9/5/2018
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Is it better to put more energy into your marriage, or should raising your kids properly be your first concern? If you think pouring your everything into your little munchkins is the best way to do things, then this episode may be a bit of an eye-opener for you. We’re going to unpack the relationship between happy marriages and happy parenting and happy kids. And it may not be what you expect to hear. Think of Your Family as a System Let me start with a little bit of psychobabble here but...

Duration:00:19:05