Chronic Wellness

Should I apply for Social Security Disability? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard I am not a legal advisor -- seek professional guidance when trying to make legal determinations or get professional input about important questions. I have be getting Social Security benefits for about 10 years. I've helped others apply for Social Security benefits. Maybe you've been wondering whether you should apply for Social Security Disability. Let's discuss. Do your disabling conditions (mental, physical, emotional or a combination) have serious impacts on your ability to perform major life functions? Have you paid into Social Security Disability? Have you been working at a job and exhausted your PTO, sick leave, or short term disability and wonder how/whether you can keep working? If you answered "yes," to most of these questions, Social Security Disability might be for you. While it is not an easy, straightforward, or simple process. However, if you've been paying in, Social Security Disability is a benefit you've earned. If you qualify, you would receive a monthly cheque for the duration of your approval. You wouldn't have to pay it back, even if you could work again in the future. You need to think about what major life functions are impacted by your disability, things like walking, breathing, bathing, eating. This is an important component of explaining why you're unable to work. It's a significant burden of evidence - but the sooner you start, the sooner you might be approved. Is now the right time for you to apply? I'll talk more about the process in future videos. If you have questions or comments please put them in the comments below. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Sleep is the foundation for everything! I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard If you're watching this on video you can see I'm wearing my dark shades -- that means my migraine is off the charts. Part of the reason is that my sleep is gone to s*it. If you're tracking, you'll also notice I haven't dropped an episode in a couple of weeks and that's down to the same reason. We are the proud parents of (1:05) a 14 year old pit-mix rescue. She is entering a phase of old age (senility, deafness, etc.) that is wreaking havoc on our sleep. There are a variety of things at play from her trying to get into our bed, her deafness, and her incontinence that are having significant impact on our sleep. This has been building up for the last couple of months, but now our sleep is being interrupted multiple times a night, every night. I can't solve this simply. Several things are happening because of this a) without a solid chunk of sleep every night, my migraines don't get a chance to reset so I'm starting at a worse place when I wake up; b) my physical pain is worse for the same reason; 3) my mind is mush brain fog and thoughts are so muddled I can't track anything; 4?) keeping up on what I need to follow up on as a professional patient or any extras in life are just shot; and.... I forgot the last thing. Sleep is integral. Do I need to go to friends houses and sleep for a couple of nights? Do I need to sleep in our camper van for a few nights? There's a reason we use sleep deprivation for a mechanism of torture. I acknowledge that I'm laughing right now and this isn't funny. I'm doing that out of discomfort and to put you at ease -- I'd like to have a good cry about this. However, crying takes a lot of oxygen and makes my head hurt worse. This has reduced me to tears. This had made me a jerk to live with. The dog has not responded well to drugs and I can't find a drug strong enough to keep me asleep. We'll have to find some workable solution until the end of one of our days. Do you have ideas about what to do when you aren't getting much sleep? Also, every couple of weeks I'm hosting a Chronic Wellness Conversation on IG Live with authors, thought leaders, and sick people. Go check out those recordings on my Instagram. Talk to you when I get some sleep. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Searching for joy? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard I was recently reading about what to do if you've lost your happy. This is not specifically related to depression, which requires more specialized tools and perhaps deeper interventions. This is more about fleeting joy and temperamental stuff. The suggestion was look your happiness the same way you'd look for your keys. "where did you last see it?" When was I last joyful? When did I last experience happiness? And mine those experiences for cues and clues for how to recreate it. Were there things about the environment, the people, the things you were surrounded by or what you were doing that you aren't doing today? Perhaps you can't replicate the situation, but you might be able to dig into the experiences to find some of the paths back to happiness. No, all of the circumstances may not be available (because of situation, money, or our bodies) but some of conditions might be able to be recreated. Also, our brains like puzzles. It's easy to think of all the reasons I CAN'T and I'm shortchanging myself I I'm not willing to dig a little deeper to seek out my own happiness. How can I take steps towards my own bliss? How have you brought in more light or happiness? This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Colonoscopy and autoimmune disease? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard Do you have an autoimmune disease and you're getting a colonoscopy? Consult your physician and take their advice, not mine. However, I have a lot of experience so let's get into that. In advance of the colonoscopy, prep in advance for food. You'll get detailed instructions about what to eat. The instructions are daunting. At the very end your diet will be VERY limited. But keeping enough nutrients and calories is important. Prep, think in advance about what you'll need. Make sure you have broth, a way to get protein. For me I supplemented my clear liquids with collagen powder to get protein. Think about the quality of nutrients and shop ahead. Also, as you go through the process, disclose all of your conditions and medications to your endoscopist. There may be some medications you have to stop in advance of the colonoscopy and they may need permissions from other specialists to stop those medications (like blood thinners or statins). So there are lots of layers to the process. Many of us with autoimmune disease have mixed connective tissue disorders. Because of that (and Reynaud's) I have poor circulation and I'm frequently cold. I called ahead to the surgery center and told them that. In any medical center I tend to be freezing. Add to that IV liquids, being in a paper or hospital gown, and having fluids injected into my bowel, I'm going to be very cold. Find out about whether they have the bear hug suits available or just warm blankets. But let them know in advance you'll need extra warmth. I also charge and bring my hand warmers. Maybe your veins are poor. Talk to the nurses about where the best place to access your veins are. If you have a port, let them know in advance so they can have a port nurse available. Also, you may have sensitivities to particular forms of anesthesia. If so, it's critical to let them know about that or any allergies to anesthesia in advance so they can appropriately medicate you. Bowel prep kits often times cause nausea. You can ask for anti-nausea meds to be prescribed at the same time as your prep kit. It's lousy to be nauseous on top of prepping. Managing multilayered conditions while prepping for a colonoscopy is difficult but possible. These kits are designed to keep us from getting dehydrated, but be careful to keep fluids going while you prepare. Ask lots of questions if you haven't been through this process before. If you have tips and tricks for dealing with a colonoscopy, please leave those in the comments below. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard I recently read Emily Henry's, "The People We Meet on Vacation." She did a great job putting to language the ways we are confident and insecure, and how relationships expose us to new layers of ourselves. In the book one of her characters said that the more someone got to know her, the more she was afraid they'd discover the ugly and unlovable in her. I highlighted that passage and returned to it because I think that any of us who carry any shame or worthiness wounds -- that's what's at the heart of it. That when all the trappings are stripped away, we'll come up short and be rejected. That anxiety is often to difficult to bear and so we: hustle, people-please, distance, get addicted, hurt others first, and many more habits of self-defense. What's also interesting about this is that it's a commentary on the other person, too. It suggests that I'm so skilled at maintaining a façade that you can't see through, but if you did you wouldn't like what you'd see... So it also suggests that the other person (whose opinion we seem to care a lot about) is dupable or dim. Perhaps in a life without many obstacles, it might be easy to never have to examine these questions. However, chronic pain and illness stops you short and requires facing these kinds of questions. This weekend I was talking with a friend of a friend who had a life-altering surgery. They're questioning things like "What is my worth?" "What is my value if I'm not in the world of work?" "Will my partner stay if I'm significantly transformed?" These aren't simple questions. In a world where productivity is tied to output, it's difficult to not see that as a commentary on our worth. While it's so simple for me to see that YOU have intrinsic worth, your value is your existence, your value is your YOUNESS. But, it's much more difficult for me (on a hard day) to say it about myself -- but that is the goal. Do you struggle with these questions? This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Can setting boundaries be life-saving? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard $49 Boundary Course (through April 2024) https://jennywalters.thinkific.com/courses/boundary-uprising A few more words about boundaries. With chronic illness boundaries are critical for our health. I recently read Dr. Pooja Laskhmin's best-selling book book "Real Self-Care." She examines the difference between what capitalism has told us "self-care" is and what is authentic self care. True self-care is 1) an inside job, 2) is values driven, 3) is a journey not a destination. Like so many things it is a practice. In her book, she examines four ways we claim the sacred territory of self-care and boundaries is one of those avenues. Women, in particular, tend to be poor at setting boundaries. From our conditioning to put others first, to people-pleasing tendencies, to examples of martyrdom, boundaries are not something that comes easily for most of us. However, when we are sick and our time and energy are so limited, boundaries are essential. One of my dear friends who is very healthy and active, is down from a recent surgery. I checked in with her this weekend. She's having a hard time slowing down. That isn't surprising. However, because she now has a month off, people are laying claim to her time. People are coming over in droves. She's feeling wiped out from the visits. She told me she's so depleted. I suggested that she needs to say "no," or set limits on how long people stay. She's having such a difficult time. I think that's so understandable. When we are unaccustomed to setting limits with people in our lives, it's very difficult to start. The first reason is likely guilt, the second is something like not wanting to offend or inconvenience others. When I was starting a new friendship years ago, my new friend told me: "Annette, I want to be closer to you, but I see you saying 'yes' to everyone and everything in your life." And I thought "yeah, because I'm a good friend!" and then she said: "until I see you saying 'no,' I can't trust your 'yes.'" That was a revelation to me! We need to be able to trust one another's "yeses" by knowing that they will say "no" when they need to. That will give me permission to do the same. But when we accommodate, people-please, and guilt-trip, that isn't always what we were socialized to do. But, as Anne Lamott says "'No.' Is a complete sentence." and so is "I've changed my mind." As the spring kicks off, maybe you can grow a new habit around boundaries. Please sign up for Jenny's class if you need a tune up in this area. Also, please use the comments to share your tips, tricks, and brags with the community about the ways you've set or improved your boundaries recently. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Can setting boundaries be life-saving? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard You know that I'm a big fan of Dr Gabor Mate. His book, "When the Body Says, 'No'" is a big part of why I'm still ALIVE today. That's a big claim and I really mean it. His work has transformed my life. If you've had cancer or an autoimmune disease, get this book. He talks about how our personalities, our family structures, our emotional tendencies, and our background have likely contributed to our illnesses. While this is not about blame, it is about getting to root causes and, therefore, solutions. When we are back in the drivers seat, we can make different decisions. The job of our emotional system is to help us self-regulate and to allow in all that is nurturing, generative, healthy, and loving. It is also designed to keep out all that is harmful, toxic, and poisonous. He draws a parallel between our emotional system and our immune system which fundamentally does the same job to keep in all that is nurishing, nurturing, feeds growth, and to keep out all that is toxic, harmful, poisonous, and leads to cell damage/demise. For those of us with chronic illnesses learning to set boundaries is a necessity. Self-care means learning to prioritize our self and in doing so, we have to set boundaries. In Gabor Mate's new book "The Myth of Normal," he has an activity about what keeps us from setting the boundaries we need to set/want to set in our life. The more often we examine, work our way through this activity, the greater potential for change we are given. It is four questions for us to respond to: 1) Where in your life are you not setting a boundary? 2) What is your belief behind not saying "no?" 3) Where did I learn this belief? 4) Who would I be without this belief? The illusions we hold about why we stay stuck have an opportunity to fall away. Boundary work is self-care. We'll keep talking a bit more about boundaries and chronic illness. Here's my challenge: brag on yourself! How are you setting boundaries? What did you learn from this activity? When did you say "no?" or any other aspect of boundary setting? Because when we are sick and have any bit of the disease to please, setting boundaries for our own self-care is really challenging. So tell us all about it!

Your health journey is all your own. I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard Several things made me think about this topic. I recently was talking about my friend Amy. She died almost exactly a year before I got my diagnosis of Pulmonary Fibrosis. She was waiting for her lung transplant and when she passed she was a frail shadow of herself. Also, my mom died with complications of several of the autoimmune diseases that I have. It's so easy -- especially when we have a difficult or unfamiliar diagnosis, to lean on Dr Google, or other peoples' experiences and let those things coopt our imagination about our illness and I think that can have some disastrous and unintended consequences. The Google will tell you that my life expectancy is 3 - 5 years. Well, here I am 9 years later. While many things COULD have led to my demise -- but tuning that out and walking my own path has been crucial. As a reforming people pleaser, as someone who values information, it's easy to be captivated by the stories people share about anyone they know who may have had something similar to what I have, how that's gone, what's worked, what remedies they've tried. Sometimes, hearing those stories can contribute to the sense that I'm doing it wrong, or add to the sense that "this is going poorly and I've already made the wrong decisions." Having done this for a while and having learned how to BE EMBODIED in this experienced: doing body scans, checking in with my thoughts and feelings, knowing when something's changed. I'm the best person to asses what's going well and when it's time to make a change. No, it isn't fun, it takes a lot of effort to tune in like that, to advocate for myself, to coordinate with my docs and insurance companies, but it's the only way to take control of my health. When I start thinking "well, she said that by this time next year things got really bad..." then I'm initiating a slew of chemicals that will lead to anxiety, fear, pain, or being addicted to my own catastrophes. Perhaps those things will happen, but perhaps they won't. But, the only guarantee is that I've robbed myself of this present moment. The idea of suffering is terrifying. I'm not trying to pretend it isn't. There is fear and anguish. But there are tools. Whether it starts with a contemplative practice, journaling, or noticing what's happening to find a skilled therapist. There are ways to keep my fear of the future from enjoying the present. This journey is YOURS ALONE, from the small to the large. But no amount of today is improved by me fixating on how bad it's going to get. Notice when you get hooked, when you start to borrow trouble. If you don't have tools, skills, or support about making change in that area, it might be time to get some. Let us know how you're making your journey your own. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard It's February, Black History Month, and we just had the Super Bowl. After watching the Netflix movie about Diana Nyad, my wife mentioned that people living with chronic pain have some things in common with elite athletes. Intense pain. Of course, unless there's injury involved, athletes can choose to stop. Obviously, living with chronic pain we can't skip the practice, training, workout. I thought it was an interesting perspective. Recently, my wife has been experiencing some hip pain and headaches. The onset has given her renewed appreciation for what it's like to live with intense chronic pain. There are moments when I appreciate the validation and other times when I'm annoyed by it. I though on this Valentines Day, I thought I'd send this note to you all in pain: I know your fuse is short, your energy is less. I think about the ways your life has had to be smaller because of pain. I'm sorry. I wish we had better solutions. I wish you weren't having to use your energy and giving so much of yourself figuring out how to get through the day/get out of bed/get to the bathroom/manage the kids/cook a meal. I hate that we don't have better pain management. This invisible demon means that others can't see all that you're up against. They can't see that all your energy is being consumed by pain. As you manage a pain level 8 and try to carry on a conversation. This isn't an easy path. You don't get to put this weight down, and experience relief. You get to take up space. It's easy to compare my suffering to others -- but it isn't helpful. If your self compassion needs a tune up, check out Kristin Neff's resources: https://self-compassion.org/category/exercises/#guided-meditations Do a meditation, journal, or take a quiz. I'm sorry you're hurting that we don't do a better job managing pain. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Chronic illness doesn't exempt me from other opportunistic illnesses. I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard [I don't know what happened to the visuals shortly into this video....] I didn't record Chronic Wellness last week. Two weeks ago I went to Seattle to meet with my specialists. While up there I contracted a virus. With a fever up around 104, I had fever dreams. When I first started to get sick -- I turned on myself. "What did I miss???" The litany of self-criticism is a habit I could stand to change. I suspect it's difficult for those in our lives to understand how additional illness impacts those of us with chronic illness. While I'm still not back to "myself" I'm grateful to be getting out of bed and for the few hours I do have. It helps me not take this for granted. Getting sick can lead me to the fear of "what if this is my new normal?" These are additional opportunities to grow and learn how to be present with myself and what is arising. Have you remained healthy during this flu/COVID/cold season? What thoughts, fears, realizations have occurred to you? This Thursday 2/8 at 12 PST I'll be hosting Alexis Hawes of the Instagram WhyIEatPlants about holistic wellness and plant-based eating. Please join us. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Is there an antidote to chronic pain? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard If you suffer daily from chronic pain, I know that you, like me wish that there were ways to resolve that pain. We've talked about novel ways to try and resolve pain. What if there were other solutions? This one takes a page out of lateral thinking. Hungarian born psychologist, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, coined the term "flow," to talk about the state of heightened engagement. Whether that's when you're engaged in a great book, lost in good conversation, or doing an activity you really love, if you've lost track of time, you've probably experienced flow. When we are in the state of flow, we can't feel as much pain. The same neurons that experience pain are engaged in that activity. It begs the question, how can we get into flow more often to get out of our pain? It is so strange that while we have a localized experience of pain (in our hip, arm, joints) the pain signal is in our brain. So if we can override the signal in our brain, we have a reduced experience of pain. So take yourself on a trip back to childhood, remember the things activities you used to loose yourself in and find ways to inject more of that in your life. This isn't foolproof -- it doesn't take my pain to zero. But there are ways that spending time with others can help distract me from my pain. I can also become engrossed with my creative outlets as a way to reduce my pain. I can also use creative outlets as a way to distract from my pain. What gets you in a state of flow? This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

Could micro-disciplines be the key to transformation? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard With the start of the calendar year the allure of resolutions and making sweeping changes is real. However, when I try to make big changes, I am often setting myself up for failure. The notion of "micro-discipline" came from one of my favorite poets, David Whyte. Rather than making big, sweeping changes, how can I make miniature, infinitesimal changes? We are the culmination of our actions and decisions while also being creatures of habit. It is really difficult to change our habits. Therefore, micro-disciplines is valuable. Some examples: rather than starting a new mindfulness practice, I'll set my alarm to go off once a day and when it does I do a body scan. Rather than attempting a whole new diet overnight, I menu plan for one meal that week with that diet in mind. Thinking about what boundaries I want to have and try practicing those boundaries first with someone who feels lower stakes. By setting small accomplishable tasks, having a win, and building our wins, and then deciding whether or not the task is worth continuing, I'm setting myself up for success. Often, research shows, the things we THINK will make us happy, are not the things that DO. The way massive ships change direction are in part by a small mechanism called "trim tabs." These devices dip into the water creating drag and slowing the boat on one side so it can turn. I like to think of these mini habits like "trim tabs." Creating a little bit of change that might change the course of my life. What micro-discipline might you start with? What have you tried? What is an area where you could put your attention and create a bit of change? This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

400 Episodes! I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard It's 2024 and this is my 400th episode. I've been absent for a couple of weeks. Part of what's been happening is my tech has been hinky but also with the 400th episode looming I wanted to have something profound to say for my 400th episode. How do we self-sabotage and bock the things we most desire? For those of us living smaller lives because of our chronic conditions we MUST get out of our own way. When our "healthy" counterparts are expanding their possibilities in ways that may not be accessible to those of us who are chronically sick. Nonetheless, it is incumbent upon us to find ways to put life, joy, and meaning into our days. The life of a professional patient is demoralizing so finding the things that light you up and spell JOY in your heart must be cultivated. We don't have to wait for the start of a New Year, we are offered a fresh start each morning. I was inspired by the portrayal of Diana Nyad in the recent Netflix of her swim from Cuba to Florida. What devotion to a singular cause! What could we accomplish if we put our mind to it? How can you see your progress and the accumulation of benchmarks. I'm continuing my Chronic Wellness Conversations on Instagram join me as I interview Amanda Chay, author of The Girlfriend's Guide to Lupus on Jan 4th at 11am PST Thank you for being on this ride with me. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard Today I'm wrapping up my series on empathy and compassion. These words are not synonyms. Once I feel empathy - identifying with someone's experience, I can behave compassionately - take action on those feelings. Empathy's shortcoming: if I don't see myself in someone else, I might not feel empathy. However, compassionate action means that I can lend myself to a cause just because I see that cause as right and good. An example: I believe in housing justice even if I can't identify with the plight of a refugee who is benefiting from that work. Empathy and compassion can be external but they can also be internal. I can also be reflective and be empathetic about my own experience and take compassionate action. It seems ideal to consider this during the holidays. Whether it's the shorter days, the expectations of the holidays, the grief or a myriad of other reasons. With chronic pain and illness, we need to take care to think about what we need or want from the season and set boundaries for ourselves. How can you be compassionate towards yourself in ways that will leave you feeling better at the end of December than you did if you just went along with what others wanted. Connection is an important part of our well-being. What connecting can you do over the holidays that will fill your cup. With long-term illness it's easy to recede. How can compassion towards yourself include connection? Pema Chodron introduced me to the practice of tonglen. A way to experience compassionate action through mindfulness. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

What's the difference between compassion and empathy? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard Last week I talked about whether we could feel another's pain. Taking a step back from that I'm deconstructing what compassion and empathy means. I identify as an empath -- in seeing one's pain I feel and identify with that pain. Mattieu Ricard, a Buddhist monk from France has studied the neurobiology of empathy and compassion. He emphasized that empathy is feeling another's pain. Ex: your child is afraid of the thunderstorm and in empathy you also feel that pain and fear. He contrasts that experience with compassion: compassion leads to action (vs empathy which leads to feeling). Compassion leads to think of interventions, contributions, help and solutions. This leads towards kindness and desire to help. Empathy is required to lead to compassion. Compassion allows a layer of distance that empathy does not. The neuroscience has demonstrated that the areas of the brain lit up during empathy were areas that lead to stress, anxiety and burnout. Whereas, the compassion areas of the brain were not in stress but problem-solving and sustainable. Do these experiences contribute to our experience of pain? As we head into the holidays. I have empathy and compassion and I hope you are extending compassion for yourselves. If you want tips and techniques for managing your illnesses and holidays (alone or with others!) check out my Holidays Playlist or go view videos 118, 117, 116, 115, 114, 291, 292, 367. This is the Chronic Wellness Podcast. I'm Annette Leonard, speaker, coach, and sick person who believes that my illnesses do not define me. If health is the absence of disease and wellness is the presence of wholeness, then no matter what your disease status, we can work toward your wellness, your wholeness. Whether or not you are ever "healthy" on paper, you can be well. Join me and others on the path back to wholeness at AnnetteLeonard.com. Whether you are a person experiencing chronic illness or are someone who loves or serves people with chronic illness I have great resources here on this channel or on my website for you.

I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard I'm listening to the podcast "The Retrievals." In which a fertility clinic at Yale had a nurse who was swapping out fentanyl for saline. The women who describe their pain go into great detail. They were systematically denied, told they had the maximum dose, suggested alternate stories to try make sense of the pain, and numerous other examples of how the doctors, nurses, spouses and the women themselves were conditioned out of believing their own experiences. It's so disheartening that in the 2020s were still doing to women what we were doing in the time of Hypocrites. When women were called "hysterical" due to free-floating uteruses. Thoroughly documented in the book "Unwell Women," how women's pain is radically under-acknowledged, untreated, dismissed. Does the explanation matter -- unless it's to help solve the problem? Why do we discredit women's pain. This becomes particularly difficult, as women, when we try to get our pain believed. Do I try to become cerebral, emotional, loud, demonstrative? Each method has it's consequences. The first time I had meningitis. I was experiencing new realities of pain. I didn't have a frame of reference for how much pain I was in. A doctor asked me about my pain on a scale of 1-10. While trying to avoid light, sound, touch, and trying not to vomit, I told him, "it's at least a nine." He said, "it's hard to believe you when you say that with a smile on your face." And my partner started to unpack the reasons I might be smiling. Not everyone has that kind of advocate who knows them that well. Thankfully, I got a spinal tap that led to me getting treatment -- but he could have given me a spinal tap and sent me home. Are you believed when you report your pain? Is your pain being addressed? Are you getting the pain-care you need?

"But you don't look sick." I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard Learning how to respond to, "but you don't look sick," without getting frustrated is a difficult thing. Maybe I don't -- and yet, I am. I often try to look fierce, because I don't feel good. Last week was Hidden Disabilities Awareness Week (Oct 15-21). Don't let the fact that we're a week late, stop you from disclosing. For those who are able-bodied, the only way to gain awareness is to learn from the experience of others. Often I shut myself down by thinking some version of, "they've heard it," "they're tired of hearing about it," "I don't want to complain," etc." We have a range of people in our lives from close to distant and there are a range of ways we might introduce this topic. Even folks with obvious disabilities also have hidden disabilities they might not talk about. For me, most of my close friends know that I'm living with chronic migraines, but they may not know the affects of this like: when I go to your house for dinner -- that low music you play for ambiance, erodes my ability to think, participate, and engage as I try to manage my pain. We are often discouraged from discussing our disabilities and illness because of adages like "if you don't have something nice to say..." Therefore, these awareness days offer us opportunities, if we chose to take them, to disclose our experiences in ways we might otherwise not. Watching two truckers signal each other with their lights recently made me think about hidden illness and disability. I wish we had covert ways of signaling one another so that we could notice each other out in the world. Knowing we are not alone relieves some of the burden. We have a deeply human desire to be understood and to be included. Telling others about my hidden disabilities allows others to do a better job of that. So the next time someone says "but you don't look sick," could this be an opportunity to disclose and invite someone to know you a bit better rather than leaving the interaction feeling diminished by the comment.

This list compiled by Charity Watch Doctors Without Borders (http://www.doctorswithoutborders.org/)/MSF is donating medical supplies to hospitals/health facilities in Gaza responding to medical needs. MSF does not run medical programs in Israel, which has strong emergency and health services. MSF has been running medical programs in Gaza for more than 20 years, supporting a health care system that urgently lacks both medical personnel and supplies. Their teams work in three hospitals and several outpatient clinics, offering comprehensive care for people suffering from burns and trauma. Since 2018, MSF has been running a reconstructive surgery program in northern Gaza. They also operate several medical programs in the West Bank. Anera (http://www.anera.org/), has no political or religious affiliation, works on the ground with partners in Palestine mobilizing immediate emergency relief. Anera has already delivered 12,000 bags of IV solutions to Gaza’s largest hospital. In the coming days they will distribute food parcels, water, and hygiene kits to displaced families. Muslim Aid USA (http://www.mausa.org/) is actively responding to this humanitarian crisis, working alongside their partners on the ground; delivering essential medical aid and equipment to the main hospitals in Gaza. They are also providing food packages and vital non-food items such as hygiene kits and other necessities to those who are in need. The American Jewish Joint Distribution Committee (http://www.jdc.org/) has activated their emergency response across Israel. In the south of the country, they have widespread, existing operations and programs providing support to those directly impacted by the conflict, including elderly, people with disabilities, children and families at risk. Hadassah (http://www.hadassah.org/) hospitals in Israel and its medical teams are currently providing crisis medicine and trauma-care to those impacted by the on-going conflict. Zakat Foundation of America (https://www.zakat.org/) has been in this volatile area for over 20 years. Alongside local partners they provide both long-and short-term aid. Zakat has stated that it is supplying emergency relief, including: medical supplies, hygiene kits, food, warm blankets and clothing. HIAS (http://www.hias.org/) has been operating in Israel since 1950. Within 24 hours of the initial conflict, HIAS activated its Emergency Response protocols to provide life-saving support to those displaced. Their core emergency capabilities include hygiene supplies, blankets, dignity kits, mental health and psychological support, and child protection. Mercy Corps (http://www.mercycorps.org/) has operated in the West Bank and Gaza since 1986, providing humanitarian support including access to water, working with children and young people, and connecting people to economic opportunities. Mercy Corps currently has people on the ground assessing the needs of those impacted by the conflict and will resume their lifesaving programs when it is safe to do so. Oxfam-America (https://www.oxfamamerica.org/) has been working in the Occupied Palestinian Territory and Israel since the 1950s and established its only country office in the area in the 1980s. In total they work with 28 partner organizations to offer lifesaving support including: rebuilding water and sanitation infrastructure, hygiene kits, distributing cash, food and bedding. Oxfam is in discussion with partners on how to begin their humanitarian response once it is safe to do so. See the full list: https://www.charitywatch.org/charity-donating-articles/gaza-israel-conflict-top-rated-charities-providing-aid

Can this supplement improve long COVID? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard My journey into chronic illness started with mono. My start of mono was Epstein Barr Virus. At the 6 month mark, I still wasn't better. When my doctor told me that meant I qualified for being under the umbrella of chronic fatigue syndrome, I burst into tears. CFS, later called ME or myalgic encephalomyelitis, is now called Post Viral Fatigue Syndrome and includes long-COVID. Last month (9/23) in the journal Nutrition and Food Science, in a double-blind, 6 month study, it was found that creatine supplement helped. It improved memory, brain function, muscle function, taste, smell and a couple other functions. Creatine is a common supplement. The study dose was 4 grams/day. That would cost $15/month. It's exciting to imagine that this could make a difference in people's lives. ****If you're thinking about making changes to your diet or health care talk to your doctor or health care provider. ****

Do our words and thoughts directly affect our health? I’m Annette Leonard of https://www.annetteleonard.com find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theannetteleonard In the early 2000's there was an independent film called "What the Bleep do We Know?" exploring how quantum mechanics work in our lives. It was my first exposure to the idea of manifesting. In that movie I learned about Matsaru Emoto. He documented the impact of various things on water. He has a book called "The Hidden Messages in Water." Understanding that most of our bodies and much of the world's surface IS water, this research seems incredibly important. Dr. Emoto compared the crystal structure of different drops of water in different conditions. Sometimes he took a picture of a drop of water, then exposed it to lovingkindness meditation, then photographed that same drop of water and it had grown elaborate and beautiful new crystal structures. Conversely, he took heavily polluted water - which under magnification didn't look like a crystal but a chaotic, splattery mess, and after doing a meditation for it, stunningly beautiful intricate crystals appeared. Beautiful crystal structures can be present and when exposed to people fighting or hateful messages, it turns into that disjointed, messy, no longer crystalline structure. OUR BODIES are more than 70% water. What messages are we bathing OUR water in? Are we cultivating our greatest capacity for healing? The best opportunity to knit together and form strong structures? Being sick, living in isolation, there are so many ways to compare myself and come up short. When His Holiness the Dalai Lama of Tibet first came to the US. Sharon Saltzberg was among those who met him. She asked what are your teachings for helping those of us dealing with self-hatred. The meeting had to stop while he met with his interpreters and advisors. Because in Tibetan, there was no word or concept for "self-hatred." Capitalism requires self-hatred. What is the medicine you need to hear? If you don't know, start with "I love you." These studies have been replicated again and again. Even just with a bottle of water where a loving message like "I love you," "you're beautiful," "thank you," and left for 24 hours, yielded spectacularly beautiful crystals. And the opposite was also true: when messages like "I hate you," "you're ugly," etc. were taped on the bottle and left for 24 hours, there was no crystal structure left to photograph.