This Gun in My Hand

Another day, another public brawl on the streets of Parabellum City. Will Falk quell the unrest and clean up the streets? Are there laws requiring reporters to have alliterative names and film critics to use French terms? Listen to find out! Black Cats and Bad Habits, episode 138 of This Gun in My Hand, was Rob Northrup crossing your path. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What contains several bits which can form a fragmentary story when used together? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. The Black Cat in this episode is NOT a rip-off of the Marvel comics character with the same name. It’s a rip-off of the public domain superhero Black Cat who first appeared in Pocket Comics #1, August 1941, and had her own title from Harvey Comics with various name changes (Black Cat Western Comics, Black Cat Mystery Comics, Black Cat Mystic) until 1963. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Cat_(Harvey_Comics) 2. When Wordplay took his second play “Shoot” on tour, he found it was not as popular outside of Parabellum City. 3. Lana Krang presumably uses a paper or cardstock folder for her Bits file. Mine is digital but the filename is “Bits.” 4. If I was trying to cheer up Miss Krang, I’d remind her of some artistically and monetarily successful novelists who were late bloomers: Umberto Eco wrote a lot of non-fiction before his first novel, The Name of the Rose, was published when he was 50. Alan Bradley was 71 when his excellent first novel, The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie, was published. Many such cases. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the transitional and closing music were from The Big Combo (1955), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: The cat begs for food. Meowing.wav by tosha73 License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/548352/ Sound Effect Title: HARP GLISSANDO DOWN.WAV License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/olver/sounds/505064/ Sound Effect Title: Cat Eating Dry Food by qubodup License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/218181/ Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/ Sound Effect Title: Kicking/Forcing/Breaking Wooden Door License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/qubodup/sounds/160213/ Sound Effect Title: Gun Fire by GoodSoundForYou License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/1998-Gun-Fire.html Sound Effect Title: Foley_Phone_Old_PickUp_HangUp_Mono.wav by Nox_Sound License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/559475/ Sound Effect Title: Clean phone tones.wav by FreqMan License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/24371/ Sound Effect Title (coin drop): Pay Phone.wav by everythingsounds License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/197141/ Sound Effect Title: phone rotary dial number.flac by kyles License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/637751/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified version of a public domain postcard painting by Frances Brundage, via Wikimedia Commons. https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Frances_Brundage_schwarze_Katze.jpg Image Alt text: Painting from an old greeting card by Frances Brundage shows a rosy-cheeked little blond girl in a black hat with a red ribbon and bow around it, somewhere between a witch’s hat and a Puritan’s hat. She holds up a distressed black kitten with a huge red bow and ribbon around its neck. The girl wears a white shirt with sleeves to her elbows and a red shawl.

How much is a set of gold dentures worth? How many people have to die before this lovable American scoundrel in Havana and his lovely, smokey-voiced ward decide “will they or won’t they?” Listen to find out! Gold Dentures, episode 137 of This Gun in My Hand, was crafted and gilded by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. How do I sound like someone from a foreign land? This Gun in My Hand! (Wait, I don’t mean they fire guns more often. How could anyone have more guns than Americans? Never mind. This Gun in My Hand.) Show Notes: 1. If you haven’t heard the old time radio drama Bold Venture, you should give it a try. It ran from 1951-1952, starring Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall, set in pre-Castro Cuba. https://archive.org/details/OTRR_Bold_Venture_Singles 2. The part of King Moses in Bold Venture was performed by Jester Hairston. One of the first black students to attend Tufts University, Hairston studied music at Julliard, collaborated with Russian composer Dmitri Tiomkin for 30 years, wrote the song “Amen” that became a hit for The Impressions in 1964, and acted in tv and films like The Alamo, To Kill a Mockingbird, In the Heat of the Night, I’m Gonna Git You Sucka and Being John Malkovich. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jester_Hairston 3. Music for the Bold Venture radio show was composed by David Rose, who later wrote music for films and tv shows like Leave it to Beaver, Bonanza, Little House on the Prairie and Highway to Heaven. If you think of the jazzy trombone song that has become a cliche of burlesque, you’re probably thinking of Rose’s composition “The Stripper,” which hit #1 in 1962. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Rose_(songwriter) Credits: The opening and transitional music clips were from episodes of the public domain radio show Bold Venture. Closing music was from the public domain film Killer Bait (1949). Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: Ocean waves white noisy BAHAMAS 180520.wav by TRP License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/573179/ Sound Effect Title: R28-47-Man and Woman Screaming.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/482833/ Sound Effect Title: 38 Caliber Gun Shot 5x Recorded by Mike Koenig License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/375-38-Caliber-Gun-Shot-5x.html Sound Effect Title: Footsteps in Sand by kessir License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/264124/ Sound Effect Title: 22lr Caliber Rifle Shots and Reloading License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/717133/ Music Title: rmr morphagene reels - latin_guitar by jjbbllkk License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/530725/ Sound Effect Title: 05 - Swing doors by 14GSionJ License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/419387/ Sound Effect Title: Footsteps Dress Shoes Wood Floor.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/allrealsound/sounds/161756/ Sound Effect Title: custom_TMNT_punch_sounds_part_2_12242024 by Artninja License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/779939/ Sound Effect Title: Coconuts hit together then fall onto a wood floor by JHo3000 License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/693517/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified version of a 1940s postcard, artist unknown, presumed to be public domain. Image Alt text: A colorful postcard labeled “Souvenir of Havana, Cuba” with a rectangle in upper right that says “PLACE STAMP HERE” and a few lines to write an address. A photo of the National Capitol Building in Havana colorized to highlight flowers, palm trees and a cloudy blue sky in the background.

Has Petra finally given up her pursuit of Falk and found a new love? Is he man enough for her? Is he a man? Is stress a killer? Listen to find out! The Bitter Tears of Petra Wojciehowicz, episode 136 of This Gun in My Hand, were dispensed from the coin-operated intelligence Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. Into what mesmerizing object do I gaze to view the future? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Anyone who grew up within broadcast range of Detroit tv in the 1980s will remember Ben Franklin’s unlikely proverb from the ubiquitous Highland Appliance commercials on Presidents’ Day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6waErG4Qwc 2. The commercial for Ghost Detective was inspired by “The Thing in The Tunnel,” an episode of Weird Circle radio show originally broadcast March 4th, 1945. https://archive.org/details/OTRR_Weird_Circle_Singles 3. In November-December 1997, Burger King kid’s meals contained toys promoting the animated feature film Anastasia, including the white bat Bartok who spoke three phrases. One of the phrases was “Stress, it’s a killer.” Due to the cheap mechanism that played recorded phrases, a parent claimed on tv news that this delinquent toy was telling her child, “Hey, have a tequila.” 4. I’m almost positive Falk has used the expression “love is love” in a past episode. But his memory is as bad as mine. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: old pinball.wav by mapleleaf License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/mapleleaf/sounds/34730/ Sound Effect Title: MM Project -10 Pinball by RTB45 License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/368767/ Sound Effect Title: money_box.mp3 by Taira Komori License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/212398/ Sound Effect Title: Ticket machine printing a ticket by Licorne_En_Fer License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/772976/ Sound Effect Title: Footsteps on gravel by Joozz License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/Joozz/sounds/531952/ Sound Effect Title: Footsteps Dress Shoes Wood Floor.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/allrealsound/sounds/161756/ Sound Effect Title: scifi_scare_b.aiff by realtheremin License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/119012/ Sound Effect Title: Squeaky Car Door License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/coltures/sounds/262325/# Sound Effect Title: S37-24 Car starts; revs; skids; crashes; skids; footsteps; voices sirens.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/675839/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the public domain cover of The Century, Midsummer Holiday Number 1895, from a lithograph by artist Louis Rhead (1857-1926). Image Alt text: Colorful art nouveau style illustration of a woman in a gauzy yellow dress leaning back against a stone bench. Her right hand holds a huge brown leaf which she’s fanning over her head. Her left arm is draped along the back of the bench. Sunflowers rise behind her. We can also see a large body of water with sailboats in the background, and a small sun-dial beside her. She has brown hair and a wistful expression, maybe pleasant, maybe bored. Letters in the upper right say The Bitter Tears of Petra Wojciehowicz.

Can Falk vanquish one of the grimmest, darkest, most dangerous vigilantes to ever delight audiences in our grimmest, darkest world? How do you have more than one origin story? Listen to find out! Falk Meets Mat Ban, episode 135 of This Gun in My Hand, was grimly darkened by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Little Heist in the Big Woods and Other Revisionist Atrocities. Good lord, I wrote this script so long ago, it was promoting my previous story collection. For the freshest fiction, buy my novella Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. How do I signal when the story is about to get gritty? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Catafalque Earth Moving Equipment is not affiliated with Monback Brothers Trash Hauling. 2. We did not hit this season’s quota with episode 131. But there’s still time. 3. The often-repeated origin story of a certain vigilante detective in long underwear begins with his parents getting killed after they saw The Mark of Zorro. The Crimson Clown mentioned in this episode was another anti-hero from Johnston McCulley, creator of Zorro. No films of The Crimson Clown were released in our universe, to the best of my knowledge. 4. How many spoonerisms did you count in this episode? I count at least three. I’m particularly proud of Mat Ban: The Narc Right Detournes. Credits: The opening music was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. The music for “Come Listen to Mat Ban” is my poor attempt to sound like Joel Mabus’s arrangement of “Blues in a Bottle,” first recorded and released 1928 by Prince Albert Hunt’s Texas Ramblers although the original author is unknown, “traditional.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfT4cJA1n64&t=29s Sound Effect Title: Rain.WAV by inchadney License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/123703/ Sound Effect Title: Downpipe2.wav by digitfishmusic License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/digifishmusic/sounds/71594/? Sound Effect Title: Footsteps Dress Shoes Wood Floor.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/allrealsound/sounds/161756/ Sound Effect Title: helmutscream_short.wav by creativeheroes License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/84353/ Sound Effect Title: Wood_Creak_02.wav by dheming License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/177779/ Sound Effect Title: Real Colt 45 M1911 (shot) by Carmelomike License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/people/Carmelomike/sounds/255216/ Sound Effect Title: Bouncing Glas Marbles.wav by Cymeon License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/245402/ Sound Effect Title: 06-1 Shovel by 16GPanskaKomarkova_Marina License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/496725/ Sound Effect Title: Footsteps on gravel by Joozz License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/Joozz/sounds/531952/ Sound Effect Title: Beep 1 sec.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/austin1234575/sounds/213795/ Sound Effect Title: 38 Caliber Gun Shot 5x Recorded by Mike Koenig License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/375-38-Caliber-Gun-Shot-5x.html Sound Effect Title: Punching with ivy by itsadequate License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/s/353676/ Sound Effect Title: Punches.wav by CGEffex License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/s/94679/ Sound Effect Title: G24-01-Warner Brothers Body Fall.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/438300/ The image...

Why have the abandoned farm houses outside of town filled up and why are the squatters shooting at each other? Are they even human? What is a “mam-mama” or a “goomah?” What state is Parabellum City in? Listen to find out! This Banjo on My Knee, episode 134 of This Gun in My Hand, was farmed and worked by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What musical instrument accompanies my lyrical exposition? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. When I moved from Michigan to Houston for a year, courting my pen-pal Melinda, I heard one of her teen-aged nieces use the term “Mam-mama” for her grandmother. I developed a theory that across the South, they keep adding the sound “mam” for every generation of a matriarch. My theory was wrong. It was just one kid who had trouble pronouncing “grandmama.” 2. “Goomah” is an Americanized pronunciation of the Italian word “comare,” informally used to mean mistress. 3. A great aunt or second cousin in my mother’s father’s family published a book of genealogy and stories about the family, including a poem by somebody way back which included the down-homey line “Now Pa, you’re fabricatin’.” 4. Another mistake I found after recording and editing which I didn’t feel like fixing: the word “this” is a demonstrative pronoun or demonstrative determiner, not a personal pronoun. Credits: The opening music was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Interstitial music from the public domain radio show Mystery House, “Dagger in the Dark” broadcast July 5, 1946. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: Park ambience - mostly birds License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/Mafon2/sounds/274175/# Sound Effect Title: Shoe polishing - tripple wipe stroke - 221098_AshtiHari_SD100_Term4.wav by 221098HariPotter License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/221098HariPotter/sounds/655571/? Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/ Sound Effect Title: Gun Fire by GoodSoundForYou License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/1998-Gun-Fire.html Sound Effect Title: 38 Caliber Gun Shot 5x Recorded by Mike Koenig License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/375-38-Caliber-Gun-Shot-5x.html Sound Effect Title: Real Colt 45 M1911 (shot) by Carmelomike License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/people/Carmelomike/sounds/255216/ Sound Effect Title: 22lr Caliber Rifle Shots and Reloading License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/717133/ Sound Effect Title: gavel-double.flac By zerolagtime (Sen. John Kerry recorded from C-Span) License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/people/zerolagtime/sounds/70069/ Sound Effect Title: typewriter18.ogg by tams_kp License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/43558/ Sound Effect Title: G24-01-Warner Brothers Body Fall.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/438300/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the cover of Hillbilly Comics, Volume 1, Number 4, October 1955, by Art Gates, public domain. Full issue available at: https://digitalcomicmuseum.com/preview/index.php?did=12739 Alt Image Text: Comic book art line art of six stereotypical hillbillies in a sleek yellow convertible, speeding away from the silhouette of a man jumping in the distance, a word balloon saying “Stop” pointing to him. A man with black beard, no mustache and ragged hat is smiling as he leans over the steering wheel. A...

Summoned by a young woman, Falk returns to a mysterious estate in Shropshire that simultaneously exists in Parabellum Heights. Will Falk foil the royal kidnapping plot? How does the outcome of this adventure hinge on the undergarments of rodents? Listen to find out! On Her Majesty’s Secret Scamper, episode 133 of This Gun in My Hand, was governed by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What do I dip in the water to propel a longship? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Melinda challenged me: “The ultimate would be [an episode about] Hamster Panties brought to you by Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling.” 2. Yes, Penelope is named after the character from the animated series Hamtaro, released in the US in 2002. 3. Why does “Card Sense” Jimmy Barnes sound like a bad Ronald Coleman impression in episode 95, but like a bad Christopher Connelly impression in this episode? Because just like that other action hero known for his skill with cards, the character is sometimes British and other times American. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQJOAiukFkI 4. Falk’s earlier dalliance at Vulverwood Hall and the first appearance of Miss Carlotta Shaywood were in episode 108, “Zildjian’s Away to Shropshire.” If you can’t get enough hamster adventures, listen to episode 78, “Speed Detective.” Or “The Hamster Caper of Curtis Cleever,” a 1979 episode of Sears Radio Theater narrated by Cicely Tyson. https://archive.org/download/sears-radio-theatre_202008/790628%20104%20The%20Hamster%20Caper%20of%20Curtis%20Cleever.mp3 According to Wikipedia, the anthology series had a different theme for each night of the week, and a different host. Tyson hosted “Love and Hate Nights” on Thursdays. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sears_Radio_Theater 5. Shropshire borders Wales so I spent an extra few minutes finding bird call ambience recorded in Wales for the bit while they’re in Shropshire, and North Devon bird calls for the bit talking about Hemsford pansies. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: R23-42-Rowing or Rapids.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/480844/ Sound Effect Title: (Simulated) Underwater boat oar sounds by jay_mar License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/561314/ Sound Effect Title: CRWDBatl_Crowd Grunting, Exerting, Metered, Rowing_ShaneVincent_GSC24_BIN-AmbeoVR.wav by ShangusBurger License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/763939/ Sound Effect Title: R27-37-Metal Clanks and Hits.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/486295/ Sound Effect Title: R29-39-Chinese Screams in Battle.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/479582/ Sound Effect Title: R28-51-1940s Hollywood Japanese Soldiers Scream.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/482804/ Sound Effect Title: R28-44-Women Screaming and Rapid Talking.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/479894/ Sound Effect Title: Car_motor_Sound.m4a License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/Blizzard123/sounds/504633/# Sound Effect Title: Squeaky Car Door by coltures License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/262325/ Sound Effect Title: Screeching Tyres by iainmccurdy License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/650934/ Sound Effect Title: Margam Park Bird Song (processed) by g.strange42 License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/684191/ Song Title:...

How will Falk solve problems like social disease, substance abuse or stranger danger? What happened to the villain at the end of the episode? Maybe if you listen, you’ll find out. Did you ever think of that? A Very Special Thirty Eight, episode 132 of This Gun in My Hand, was written, voiced and edited especially by the only member of its cast and crew, Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What prevents me from suffocating in an unventilated chamber? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. “The nonsense rat is endemic to the Nicobar Islands” in India, inhabiting “tropical evergreen and semi-evergreen forests,” according to Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nonsense_rat 2. I’m not sure if enough people were flying across the USA in 1939 for coastal elites to have developed the insult of “flyover states.” Let’s pretend they had. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Other interstitial music was taken from the public domain radio show Bold Venture. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: Park ambience - mostly birds License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/Mafon2/sounds/274175/# Sound Effect Title: Real Colt 45 M1911 (shot) by Carmelomike License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/people/Carmelomike/sounds/255216/ Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/ Sound Effect Title: FX_Footsteps_Outside_Pavement01.WAV by PeteBarry License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/647403/ Sound Effect Title: Traffic mel 1.wav by malupeeters License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/malupeeters/sounds/191350/ Sound Effect Title: Old refrigerator door.m4a by ckjzam License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/421626/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of a public domain print advertisement for the International Harvester Defender Refrigerator, found in the 5 October 1946 issue of Australian Women’s Weekly. Artist unknown. https://archive.org/details/1946-advertisement-for-international-harvester-defender-refrigerator Image Alt text: Painting from a 1946 magazine ad shows a woman in a sleeveless red blouse and yellow skirt with flowery decoration near the waist, gesturing with her left hand towards an open refrigerator beside her. Maybe she’s in a showroom because she’s holding a curtain with her right hand. The fridge is packed with milk bottles, jars, soda or wine, a platter of fruit, a bundt cake, a whole chicken on a plate. Across the top of the image it says “THIS GUN IN MY HAND PRESENTS.” An unrolled scroll in the bottom left reads “A Very Special Thirty-Eight.”

Where am I? How could they leave me alone with my thoughts? You know it’s matrilineal, right? Listen to find out! Johnny Got His Gun in My Hand, episode 131 of This Gun in My Hand, was encased and basketed by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. How do I disperse powder with deadly results? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. The floor cleaning solution we used at Taco Bell in 1995 was labeled “degreaser/desengrasadora.” It was not a brand name but it sounds flowery. Just in case someone in our darkest timeline really uses that brand name, let me remind you that the audio and text of This Gun in My Hand are works of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places and events are products of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: bustle in the pub License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/organicmanpl/sounds/403285/ Sound Effect Title: HARP GLISSANDO DOWN.WAV License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/olver/sounds/505064/ Sound Effect Title: Gun Fire by GoodSoundForYou License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/1998-Gun-Fire.html Sound Effect Title: House Front Door Inside 3.wav License: Public domain https://freesound.org/people/saturdaysoundguy/sounds/388027/# The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the cover of Dime Mystery Magazine, Volume 28, Number 2, January 1943, art by Milton Luros. In public domain. Image Alt text: Painted pulp magazine cover. A red-haired woman in yellow blouse pulls back startled from a bony, possibly undead creature in a sarcophagus in front of her, raising a knife toward her. She’s dropping a small box with Egyptian drawings on it. The walls behind her show Egyptian style figures. Along the top it says 10¢, “JAN” and has “A Popular Publication” logo which looks like a skull. The title across the top is “THIS GUN IN MY HAND ZINE.” A small label in lower right shows a blue eagle and “BUY WAR BONDS AND STAMPS FOR VICTORY.” A larger box in lower left shows white letters on red background: “AN IMAGE THAT’S ALMOST COMPLETELY UNRELATED TO THIS EPISODE. EXCEPT THERE IS A SARCOPHAGUS IN IT SO THAT COUNTS.”

Can Falk and his friends stop a careless rocket launch in the heart of Parabellum City that could damage buildings and injure citizens? Which heroes or villains will guest star on this season finale? Does the Moon have air? Listen to find out! Shoot the Moon, episode 130 of This Gun in My Hand, was launched by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon, which is not owned by the world’s RICHEST Nazi. But he’s kiiiiiinda… With what do I shoot the moon? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. There are too many special guests in this episode to list all their previous appearances. If you’re fanatical, you can look them up in the subject index linked below, which lists character appearances, characters mentioned, locations, music, ads and fake radio shows in the previous 129 episodes. https://thisguninmyhand.blogspot.com/2022/02/subject-index.html 2. I usually try to restrain myself from pointing out all the pop culture references in episodes of This Gun in My Hand, because if you don’t recognize the reference in the first place, it’s not going to become funny when it’s pointed out. But just to give a sense of the volume, here are all the allusions or subjects of parody in this episode: Buck Rogers, Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, Moonraker, Batman, Godfather II, Agatha Christie, Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Hill Street Blues, Twin Peaks, Barney Miller, Green Hornet, Buckaroo Banzai, Defenders of the Earth, GI Joe, the Secretary of “Health and Human Services” (sic), and that guy who capitalized on his inherited generational wealth and suckered people into believing he’s a genius (sorry, that doesn’t narrow it down, does it?). Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950). The “Spoilers” commercial music was from The Scar (aka Hollow Triumph, 1948). Closing music was from Killer Bait (1949). All three films are in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: Pop Performed by Rob pulling the stopper out of a 60mL enteral syringe Sound Effect Title: S16-06 Light wooden door open & close.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/675878/ Sound Effect Title: Djembe Hit 13 Hi Rim.wav by carlmartin License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/158957/ Sound Effect Title: Punch.wav By ztrees1 License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/people/ztrees1/sounds/134934/ Sound Effect Title: EARTHQUAKE OR DISTANT SPACE SHUTTLE RUMBLE.WAV by metrostock99 License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/203281/ Sound Effect Title: Rumble 1.wav by Zeraora License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/524489/ Sound Effect Title: Landmass / Earth Rumble by el-bee License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/363122/ Sound Effect Title: Rockfall (7lrs,grnlzr,Eq) 2.wav by newlocknew License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/497206/ Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the novel cover “And Then The Town Took Off,” art by Edmund Emshwiller. Image Alt text: Painting shows close-up of a rocket or jet pilot through the clear canopy of the vehicle, high in the sky. Through the side of his windshield we see a massive hunk of earth with houses and buildings on top of it moving through the air, as if it had been removed with a giant ice cream scoop and hurled into orbit.

Can Falk bring down an accounting firm with ties to organized crime? Can math lead to redemption? What’s the Croatian equivalent of “bada boom, bada bing”? Listen to find out! No Accounting for Taste, episode 129 of This Gun in My Hand, was put in the red and written off by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. How do I move data from temporary accounts on an income statement to permanent accounts on a balance sheet? With This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. The absurd street names and Mr. Bellechek’s convoluted plan were inspired by/in homage to/ripped off from the public domain January 31, 1949 episode of Lux Radio Theatre titled “The Street With No Name.” A section of dialog with the boss and mugs repeating his plan were taken almost verbatim from there. https://archive.org/details/OTRR_Lux_Radio_Theatre_Season_15_Singles/Lux_Radio_Theatre_49-01-31_643_Street_with_No_Name.mp3 2. I have no opinion about the efficacy or personality of any sport team manager ever and intend no satirical commentary on them in this story. It’s up to consumers of stories how to interpret them anyway. Don’t get me started on “The Death of the Author” theory because I will go off. The audio and text of This Gun in My Hand are works of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places and events are products of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons or organized crime families, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. No managers were harmed in the making of this story. 3. Most of the absurd street names are taken from titles of actual noir films or old songs. 4. Here’s the wikipedia entry on the Five Families who run the Mafia in NYC. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Five_Families Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Music Title (background for commercial): Clarinet Squawk Composed by Anton Lada, Yellow Nuņez and Joe Cawley Performed by Louisiana Five Recorded 12 September 1919, Edison 50609-R License: Public Domain https://freemusicarchive.org/music/Louisiana_Five/Edison_Blue_Amberol_3896/Clarinet_squawk/ Sound Effect Title: HARP GLISSANDO DOWN.WAV License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/olver/sounds/505064/ Sound Effect Title: 38 Caliber Gun Shot 5x Recorded by Mike Koenig License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/375-38-Caliber-Gun-Shot-5x.html The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the paperback cover of Down and Out by Les Masters, painted by Victor Olson, thought to be public domain. Image Alt text: Painting of a man in blue suit, white shirt, light blue striped tie, seated behind a desk. He’s smiling slightly with his elbows on the desktop, his hands together in front of him with a lit cigarette. He has dark hair. The desk has a pencil cup and only one paper on it. Beside him is a sliver of window with a view of the nighttime cityscape and a vertical sign just outside the window that reads “ACCOUNT”. Presumably the rest of the word is cut off. Caption in upper right reads “NO ACCOUNTING FOR TASTE.”

Will Falk discover who bombed a residential building in Heck’s Pantry? Can he find someone to punch or shoot for this villainy? What’s the industry standard for radio kissing? Listen to find out! Lips That Yearn, episode 128 of This Gun in My Hand, was a bomb dropped by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What’s totally useless at pulling out people who are trapped under rubble? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. For excerpts of testimony from the Haas Unreliable Narrativities Commitee, listen to Episode 72, “Undeniable Narrator.” https://archive.org/details/tgimh-72-undeniable-narrator Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950) and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Other music comes from “Journey Into Fear,” the June 9, 1946 episode of the public domain radio show Hour of Mystery. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: Foley_Footsteps_ShedWoodenFloor.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/523273/ Sound Effect Title: Footsteps Dress Shoes Wood Floor.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/allrealsound/sounds/161756/ Sound Effect Title: Wood Falling - 4 Drops.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/Manim8/sounds/577452/ Sound Effect Title: Huge Cinematic Explosion.wav by musicace17 License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/486551/ Sound Effect Title: Rubble Trouble by magnuswaker License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/758580/ Sound Effect Title: Rocks Falling No-Reverb Edition 16 Bit. Foley Sound by ALLANZ10D License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/323477/ Sound Effect Title: Wood_Creak_02.wav by dheming License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/177779/ Sound Effect Title: S16-06 Light wooden door open & close.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/675878/ Sound Effect Title: Larun_Mountains_Low_QuietWind.aif by nicotep License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/683674/ Sound Effect Title: Creaking Door by eqavox License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/709418/ Sound Effect Title: G28-27-Crowd Fast Walla Applause.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/438387/ Sound Effect Title: Sitcom Laughter with Applause, Small Audience by Kinoton License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/371562/ The image accompanying this episode is a detail of “Collapsed structures after the 1935 Shinchiku-Taichū earthquake” from 《楊肇嘉留真集》, "Yang Zhaojia's Collection of True Pictures." License for image: Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 International. https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Collapsed_structures_after_the_1935_Shinchiku-Taich%C5%AB_earthquake.jpg

Will Exposition Boy expose the backstory of Billy Narrator, boy detective? Can Falk prevent them from destroying the whole episode and the sanity of his listeners? Listen to find out! Clash of the Story Boys, episode 127 of This Gun in My Hand, was narrated and exposed by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. How do I settle creative differences? With This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Thanks to Pete Larsen for the idea for this episode: “I'd love to see a fight between 'Exposition Boy, the Teen-Sidekick' and 'Billy Narrator Jr.'” 2. If you’re going to take six years to develop an international exposition and build an artificial island for it, maybe open it in an off-year when there isn’t an official world’s fair on the other coast. The Golden Gate International Exposition opened in 1939, competing with the 1939 New York World’s Fair. (Spoilers: they did run out of money and closed early in October 1939, then scrounged up a little more to reopen May-September 1940.) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_Gate_International_Exposition 3. Billy commandeered the show in episode 113, “Don’t Kid a Kidder,” to do his own show, Billy Narrator, Boy Detective. https://archive.org/details/tgimh-113-dont-kid-a-kidder 4. The Pope’s Rhinoceros by Lawrence Norfolk establishes a deeper backstory than any other novel I’ve read. The first four pages describe glacial and geologic activity that form the lake where protagonists finally come into the story on the fifth page. Literally a glacial age of backstory. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Exposition Boy’s storytelling music was from “Journey Into Fear,” the June 9, 1946 episode of the public domain radio show Hour of Mystery. Music from the second commercial was from the public domain film Death Machines (1976). Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: Traffic mel 1.wav By malupeeters License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/malupeeters/sounds/191350/ Sound Effect Title: Park ambience - mostly birds License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/Mafon2/sounds/274175/# Music Title: Kitten on the Keys Composed and Performed by Zez Confrey and His Orchestra Recorded May 4, 1922 License: Public Domain https://freemusicarchive.org/music/Antique_Phonograph_Music_Program_Various_Artists/Antique_Phonograph_Music_Program_05052009/Kitten_on_the_Keys/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of one panel from the April 28, 1929 public domain comic strip Just Kids by Ad Carter. The title of the comic strip changed to Mush Stebbins and His Sister in 1950.

Have beings from outer space landed in Heck’s Pantry? Will Falk stop the inhuman aural assault on Parabellum City? How come I don’t get no bassoon solo in the commercial? Listen to find out! A Song of Brass and Ash, episode 126 of This Gun in My Hand, was blown until it was windy by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. How do I get to Carnegie Hall? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. When searching for a sad trombone sound on freesound dot org, I found this cache of 91 twisted and screwed public domain trombone sounds by user PhonosUPF, most of them sounding nothing like a trombone. I’m not using all of them here, but they inspired this episode. https://freesound.org/search/?q=phonosupf+trombone 2. The Hall of Justice shown in the 1970s Super Friends cartoon was based on the design of Cincinnati Union Terminal. 3. I can’t tell if the Zurich Baroque Ensemble’s recording of Marcello’s Oboe Concerto in F Minor includes bassoon as Jojo claims. 4. Young James Marshall Hendrix carried his guitar with him everywhere he could, to school and to friends’ houses, practicing all day. 5. This Gun in My Hand podcast has existed longer than the Confederate States of America. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. The nineteen sound effects named below were created by PhonosUPF. https://freesound.org/search/?q=phonosupf+trombone In order of appearance in this episode, they were: 1. Trombone grave (501269) 2. Trombone grave 3 3. Trombone grave 2 4. Trombone metal 2 5. Trombone grave (490995) 6. Trombone stretching 13 7. Trombone signal 13 8. Trombone sequence 9. Trombone stretching 6 10. Trombone percussion 11. Trombone blow 2 12. Trombone set 13. Trombone blow 14. Trombone signal 14 15. Trombone grave 5 16. Wagnerian trombones 17? Trombone melody 18. Trombone glissandi 19. Trombone metal 5 Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/ Sound Effect Title: R10-56-Footsteps on Metal Staircase.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/480641/ Sound Effect Title: muted cornet 2.wav by thatjeffcarter License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/185435/ Sound Effect Title: tuba frullato by PhonosUPF License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/501504/ Music Title: Oboe Concerto in F Minor Composed by Alessandro Marcello Performed by The Zurich Baroque Ensemble Composition and recording are in public domain. https://musopen.org/music/45546-concerto-for-oboe-orchestra/ Sound Effect Title: Clarinet- ORTF Stereo Pair (NT-5's)-01.wav by debudding License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/44361/ Sound Effect Title: Banging Metal Lid by wolfdoctor License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/520074/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the public domain cover of the 1951 novel Blues for the Prince written by Bart Spicer, artist unknown.

Upset stomach? Feeling liverish? Is something obstructing you from your normal functions? It might be a microscopic Nazi U-boat exploring your nether regions. How will you survive? Listen to find out! This Hun in My Gland, episode 125 of This Gun in My Hand, was forcefully expelled from the lips of Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What folk remedy settles an upset stomach? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Doktor Goren’s surname is taken from a minor character from the Springbok Radio drama Vale of Darkness, written by Ron Evans. I can’t find info about when it was originally broadcast, but you can listen to the series from the Internet Archive or other sources on the web. https://archive.org/details/vale-of-darkness-19xx-xx-xx-26/Vale_of_Darkness_19xx-xx-xx_01.mp3 2. For the purposes of crossover with Melinda’s stories about fairy munchkins, hamquatches, reptilibugs and the pets of our extended family, let’s assume Fritz is actually my sister-in-law’s dog playing the trombone. He’s not a Nazi, just playing a part. 3. When I was searching for a “sad trombone” on freesound dot org, I found 91 sound trombone samples stretched and modified by user PhonosUPF. The weird dramatic sound near the end of the episode is actually two of those trombone sounds combined. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950) and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: Sad Trombone.wav by Benboncan License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/73581/ Sound Effect Title: descent.wav by Dguil License: Creative Commons Sampling+ https://freesound.org/s/85212/ Eatmore Meats commercial jingle by Allied Radio Artists. License: Public Domain https://www.oldtimeradiodownloads.com/commercials/allied-radio-artists-radio-jingles/eatmore-meat-products-195x-xx-xx Sound Effect Title: 60Hz_Tube_Radio_Hum.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/hetanoyokozuki/sounds/541812/ Sound Effect Title: G45-18-Submarine Motor Stop.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/438720/ Sound Effect Title: R18-31-Old Car Ahooga Horn.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/480002/ Sound Effect Title: Pouring Soup in a Metal Pan - Quick,Short,Gross by Hitrison License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/251410/ Sound Effect Title: trombone melody 3 by PhonosUPF License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/501272/ Sound Effect Title: trombone blow by PhonosUPF License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/491015/ Sound Effect Title: Charlie Brown Style Teacher by crashoverride6 License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/146933/ The image accompanying this episode is a collage including details from Detective Fiction Weekly, February 12, 1938 (public domain painting by V. E. Pyles) and a panel from the public domain National Comics Number 36, October 1943 (pencils and inks by Jon Blummer).

Can Falk shut down the villains who are copying his radio show? Is it a warning of horrible events to come or a plot to bring about horrible events? How does it hold up against nitroglycerin? Listen to find out! I Have Her MAC-10, episode 124 of This Gun in My Hand, was dry-fired by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What ends a story more subtly than an explosion? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Falk doesn't seem to realize the music used for his show is in public domain. He couldn’t sue anyone else who wanted to use it. 2. In our world, the US agreed in a 1977 treaty to gradually give control of the canal to the nation of Panama, planning the handoff to be complete in 1999. 3. Kids These Days might not be aware that until the end of the Twentieth Century, every American city and town and village had a directory called a “phone book” which was distributed to the public and which doxxed everyone who had a phone, listing their phone number and address. You could pay the phone company to be "unlisted," to exclude your name, number or address from the phone book. This was not considered a bribe or extortion because people had not yet reached a consensus that too many people had been stalked or killed over the decades. The introduction of cell phones seems to have changed that paradigm. I hope. Credits: The opening and transitional music clips were from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. "Kelvar" commercial music taken from Crestablanca radio commercial. https://www.oldradioworld.com/media/Vintage%20Commercials%20Crestablanca.mp3 Sound Effect Title: Car_motor_Sound.m4a License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/Blizzard123/sounds/504633/# Sound Effect Title: 60Hz_Tube_Radio_Hum.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/hetanoyokozuki/sounds/541812/ Sound Effect Title: Radio tuning-static-interference License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/quantumriver/sounds/552160/ Sound Effect Title: S15-03 Good general walla with some dishes; cheer.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/675070/ Sound Effect Title: G28-27-Crowd Fast Walla Applause.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/438387/ Sound Effect Title: R02-06-Medium Crowd Applause.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/480682/ Sound Effect Title: R28-44-Women Screaming and Rapid Talking.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/479894/ Sound Effect Title: Casio AS-51R Cassette Player Tape/Radio Switch by OneKellyOrdered License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/624638/ Sound Effect Title: Squeaky Car Door License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/coltures/sounds/262325/# Sound Effect Title: Footsteps on gravel By Joozz License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/Joozz/sounds/531952/ Sound Effect Title: House Front Door Inside 3.wav License: Public domain https://freesound.org/people/saturdaysoundguy/sounds/388027/# Sound Effect Title: Floorboard Creak 2 by Soundbysimmons License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/717231/ Sound Effect Title: Hiss of a Tilley pressurised paraffin (kerosene) lamp by odilonmarcenaro License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/275999/ Sound Effect Title: S18-13 Explosion with falling debris.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/674889/ Sound Effect Title:...

Medical help for Falk's wound is right around the corner, but how will he get past The Health Access Facilitator? Will corporate bureaucracy spell his doom? You're gonna use an Allen wrench on a pipe fitting? Listen to find out! Go to Health, episode 123 of This Gun in My Hand, was doctored by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. How do I ensure every episode goes out with a bang? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. The President of the United States depicted in this episode is fictional, not meant to represent the president you’re thinking of. Any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. 2. I thought it would make the nurse sound uninformed about plumbing if she thought an Allen wrench would help tighten a loose pipe fitting, but maybe one of those hose clamps with the bolt that tightens it could have an Allen bolt? Slightly autobiographical scene – even when I understand what tools and parts need to be used for a plumbing repair, my trouble is usually trying to fit the wrench into a tight and awkward position. Credits: The opening music clip was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Music Title: Impact Allegretto by Kevin MacLeod License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 International https://freemusicarchive.org/music/Kevin_MacLeod/Impact/Impact_Allegretto_1100/ "Gun Doctor" music and hoofbeats taken from the September 2, 1954 episode of the radio show Dr. Sixgun. License: Public Domain https://archive.org/details/otr_drsixgun Sound Effect Title: laser gun blasts #2 License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/377971/ Sound Effect Title: Laser Machine Gun By Mike Koenig License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://soundbible.com/1774-Laser-Machine-Gun.html Sound Effect Title: Laser Machine Gun by sonically_sound License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/612875/ Sound Effect Title: S18-25 Rifle shots battle.wav by craigsmith License: Publid Domain https://freesound.org/s/675666/ Sound Effect Title: distant rumbling thunderstorm, ambience by greyfeather License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/712914/ Sound Effect Title: Rumble of the rain in Africa during the rain season by felix.blume License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/190139/ Sound Effect Title: S18-13 Explosion with falling debris.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/674889/ Sound Effect Title: R12-02-Large Explosions.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/486018/ The image accompanying this episode includes modified details of panels from the public domain comics Robotmen of The Lost Planet Number 1 (1952), art by Gene Fawcette, and General Electric’s Adventures in Electronics (1955), art by George Roussous.

Can Falk persuade a string of villains to change their ways? How can you avoid entanglements with your secretary? Would you like to wrestle now? Listen to find out! Certainly No Angels, episode 122 of This Gun in My Hand, was certified angular by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What do I use to put the boom in the boiler room? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Would a gray-on-gray costume fit with a “summer” seasonal color palette? It’s possible that Writer’s Brick doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Credits: The opening and some transitional music was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Transitional music around the commercial and the “Writer’s Brick” musical sting were from the June 9, 1946 episode of the public domain radio show US Steel Hour of Mystery. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Music Title: Lobby Time By Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Lobby_Time_(ISRC_USUAN1600054).mp3 Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/ Sound Effect Title: Gun Fire By GoodSoundForYou License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/1998-Gun-Fire.html Sound Effect Title: mechanical alarm clock License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/522119/ Sound Effect Title: S18-13 Explosion with falling debris.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/674889/ Sound Effect Title: R12-02-Large Explosions.wav by craigsmith License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/486018/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the inside cover of the public domain comic book Police Lineup Number 1 (August 1951), art by Wally Wood.

What are the mysterious objects seen flying over Santopolis? Can Falk stop them with the help of a new paramilitary force made up of old familiar faces? How do you feel about cilantro? Listen to find out! Uniquely Heroic Americans, episode 121 of This Gun in My Hand, was seasoned and lorded over by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What makes my chili taste uniquely American? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Is this the first episode to quote Dead Kennedys lyrics? Maybe. 2. Darn, I should have started the ad with “speaking of motherships…” 3. Robert Thomas Northrup’s mother did not rewrite the ad text in this episode. Some unnamed fictional character who wrote the ad might have solicited notes and rewrites from their mother, or might have been lying. Many statements made by characters in This Gun in My Hand are lies or mistakes. That’s for you to determine because your interpretation is more important than the actual author’s intent. See “The Death of the Author,” an essay by Roland Barthes. https://web.archive.org/web/20200419132326/http://www.ubu.com/aspen/aspen5and6/threeEssays.html#barthes 4. “In the Western world, Persia (or its cognates) was historically the common name for Iran. In 1935, Reza Shah asked foreign delegates and League of Nations to use the term Iran (‘Land of the Aryans’), the endonym of the country, used by its native people, in formal correspondence.” - “Reza Shah,” Wikipedia, 2 January 2025, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reza_Shah#Replacement_of_Persia_with_Iran Credits: The opening music was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Transitional music around the commercial was from the June 9, 1946 episode of the public domain radio show US Steel Hour of Mystery. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: tug boat horn - sound effect.wav By komal22moiz License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/people/komal22moiz/sounds/380825/ Sound Effect Title: R11-19-Army Marching Steadily.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/480434/ (another marching sound to layer with above) Sound Effect Title: Chân Lính License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/546791/ Sound Effect Title: Stomach Rumble License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/yrdn/sounds/473989/ Sound Effect Title: groaning1.flac License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/borygmi/sounds/414975/ Sound Effect Title: 38 Caliber Gun Shot 5x Recorded by Mike Koenig License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/375-38-Caliber-Gun-Shot-5x.html Sound Effect Title: Kimmokkeita / Ricochets By YleArkisto License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/people/YleArkisto/sounds/401921/ Sound Effect Title: A slap or smack in the face License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/522596/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of the cover of the public domain comic book Fightin’ Marines Number 14 (May 1955), artist unknown. https://digitalcomicmuseum.com/index.php?dlid=21270

Can David Graham, a torpedo engineer vital to the war effort, escape from German spies? Can Falk protect him? Is that supposed to be a Greek accent? Listen to find out! Journey Into Fiasco, episode 120 of This Gun in My Hand, was driven and engineered by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. What makes torpedoes move faster? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. This episode was inspired by “Journey Into Fear,” an episode of The US Steel Hour of Mystery starring Lawrence Olivier and broadcast on June 9, 1946, which was adapted from the 1940 novel by Eric Ambler. https://www.oldtimeradiodownloads.com/thriller/the-hour-of-mystery/journey-into-fear-1946-06-09 2. No, it's not my impression of a Greek accent. The lines from Mithrodopolis in this episode are my impression of the guy from that 1946 broadcast of Journey Into Fear, doing an unidentifiable accent that's all over the place. I actually tried to sound like David Lander's character from On the Air, a 1992 David Lynch tv comedy that only aired 3 episodes in the US. 3. “Mon petit chou” was an expression I heard not in high school French class, but from my mother. She had learned it from her father who landed at Normandy three to six days after D-Day. He drove a refrigerated supply truck. I wonder in what context he learned “mon petit chou” from the locals? Credits: The opening and middle transitional music clips were from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Other music comes from “Journey Into Fear,” the June 9, 1946 episode of the public domain radio show Hour of Mystery. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: chugging diesel (bus) and rev.MP3 License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/CraftyIndividual/sounds/418436/ Sound Effect Title: bus coach ext pull up brake air release idle.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/kyles/sounds/454420/ Sound Effect Title: Bus Closing Door License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/am7/sounds/520753/ Sound Effect Title: bustle in the pub License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/organicmanpl/sounds/403285/ Sound Effect Title: Footsteps Dress Shoes Wood Floor.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/allrealsound/sounds/161756/ Sound Effect Title: Slam door.MP3 License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/SoundsForHim/sounds/395653/ Sound Effect Title: S16-06 Light wooden door open & close.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/craigsmith/sounds/675878/ Sound Effect Title: Shotgun Reload Pump Recorded by RA The Sun God License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/1959-Shotgun-Reload-Pump.html Sound Effect Title: 1911 Pistol Cocking License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/J.Anthracite/sounds/465488/ Sound Effect Title: Glock 19 Handgun Pistol Slide Cocking Sounds License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/jackmurrayofficial/sounds/393734/ Sound Effect Title: AR15 M4 Gun Hardware Magazine Movement Sounds License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/jackmurrayofficial/sounds/393732/ Sound Effect Title: Gun Cocking Sound.mp3 License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/545958/ Sound Effect Title: Pump Action Shotgun Cycle License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/370344/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of a panel from the public domain Greyhound promotional comic book Driving Like a Pro (1958), artist unknown. https://digitalcomicmuseum.com/preview/index.php?did=31501

Is it wrong to make up stories about silly gunfights fifty years ago while authoritarian figures are taking power and civilians are getting massacred as we speak? That’s the dilemma Falk has to solve, in the middle of a gunfight! The Hapless Hack of Gazpacho Gulch, episode 119 of This Gun in My Hand, was rustled up and branded with innuendo by Rob Northrup. This episode and all others are available on Youtube with automatically-generated closed captions of dialog. Visit http://ThisGuninMyHand.blogspot.com for credits, show notes, archives, and to buy my books, such as Sisyphus, Eat Your Heart Out, available in paperback and ebook from Amazon. (But wait until the strike's over to order it.) What helps me escape from my neighbor’s basement? This Gun in My Hand! Show Notes: 1. Getting a story accepted by an editor who was then fired, and getting it rejected by his replacement, was based on something that happened to my favorite creative writing professor, the late Dr. Gilbert Cross. The editor who liked his stuff published three of his spy novels under the name “Jon Winters” in the late 70s and early 80s, before getting replaced by an editor who didn’t like them. Credits: The opening music was from The Sun Sets at Dawn (1950), and the closing music was from Killer Bait (1949), both films in the public domain. Most of the music and sound effects used in the episode are modified or incomplete versions of the originals. Sound Effect Title: 38 Caliber Gun Shot 5x Recorded by Mike Koenig License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/375-38-Caliber-Gun-Shot-5x.html Sound Effect Title: Real Colt 45 M1911 (shot) By Carmelomike License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 https://freesound.org/people/Carmelomike/sounds/255216/ Sound Effect Title: Gun Fire By GoodSoundForYou License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 http://soundbible.com/1998-Gun-Fire.html Sound Effect Title: footsteps cellar.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/gecop/sounds/545030/ Sound Effect Title: Kicking/Forcing/Breaking Wooden Door License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/people/qubodup/sounds/160213/ Sound Effect Title: Plywood_Prying_01.wav By dheming License: Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 https://freesound.org/s/128408/ Sound Effect Title: door wood hit +window rattle slam bang various.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/452595/ Sound Effect Title: Crash License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/512246/ Sound Effect Title: S10-19 Falling wooden beam; big interior crash; house collapses; long.wav License: Public Domain https://freesound.org/s/675967/ The image accompanying this episode is a modified detail of an interior illustration from Street & Smith’s Western Story Magazine, Vol. CLXXIV No. 2 (June 3, 1939), public domain, artist unknown.