Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman

This week on Dates & Mates, Damona Hoffman rewinds to one of her favorite conversations with love coach and viral content creator Shaun Galanos. Shaun is the host of The Love Drive podcast and has become a rising voice in game-free, radically honest dating advice—and this episode shows you exactly why. In this raw and radically honest episode, Shaun and Damona go head-to-head on the dating games that hold us back, how to ask for what you want in bed, and what to do when someone won’t give you a straight answer. From emotional stonewalling to the pressure of dating app perfectionism, they unpack it all. What you’ll learn: Why radical honesty is the only dating strategy worth mastering How to bring up uncomfortable topics without pushing people away What stonewalling actually says—and how to respond to it How to explore kink, sexual compatibility, and deeper intimacy with confidence Why optimizing for the “perfect” person might leave you lonely How to hold your power as a strong woman without dimming your light This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. Listen to Sean on The Love Drive podcast and follow him @thelovedrive on Instagram and TikTok. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We are back with a no-holds-barred Best of Dear Damona episode—because when it comes to texting mishaps, mixed signals, and dating curveballs, this one hits home every time. In this candid conversation, Damona answers some of your juiciest dating dilemmas—from the accidental text that lands in the wrong inbox to what it really means when someone texts you “hey you” at 11:30 PM. She shares smart, compassionate advice on navigating confusing signals, staying grounded, and owning your truth in the dating game. What you’ll learn: How to respond and recover when you send the wrong text to your date Whether it’s okay to ask for better photos—and how to do it playfully The real timeline for exclusivity (spoiler: you don’t have to rush) Why it’s okay to date multiple people—and how to know when to choose How to disclose chronic conditions or disabilities with confidence Why shared values matter more than shared hobbies This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. DM Damona your questions on Instagram @damonahoffman or text 424-246-6255 to be featured on a future episode. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Damona breaks down the 5 core dating “loops” that keep singles stuck and the step-by-step strategies that lead to lasting love. With over 15 years of experience coaching thousands of daters, Damona shares how clarity, mindset, and follow-through can radically shift your dating outcomes. If you’ve been swiping without success, burning out on first dates, or unsure where to even begin, this episode offers a simple and strategic path forward. What you’ll learn: The five most common dating loops and how to break them How to avoid burnout by dating with clarity and purpose Where to actually meet the right people (online and IRL) Why your dating mindset matters more than your profile This is a special masterclass edition of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates archives. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. Want to go deeper? Learn more at DamonaHoffman.com Join the Dating Accelerator Program Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Fan favorite, Dr. Orna Guralnik, renowned psychoanalyst and host of the hit Showtime series Couples Therapy, shares what decades of clinical work have taught her about love, connection, and unconscious patterns in relationships. In this conversation, Dr. Orna also opens up about the societal shifts reshaping modern intimacy, the difference between psychoanalysis and surface-level self-help, and why listening, real, curious listening, is a radical act in partnership. What you’ll learn: How your unconscious motivations shape relationship patterns Why privilege must be acknowledged for real connection to happen How to create transformation in a partner without “fixing” them Why curiosity is the first step to emotional healing This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. Catch Dr. Orna in Couples Therapy (streaming now on Showtime) Follow her @ornaguralnikNYT Essay – “I’m a Couples Therapist. Something New Is Happening in Relationships” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Nick Viall, TV personality and host of the hit podcast The Viall Files, gets real about modern dating—from DM slides to ghosting games—and why the story we tell ourselves about love might be holding us back. In this candid conversation, Nick reflects on his years in the Bachelor franchise, what finally made love stick, and the overlooked ways women can help men feel safe, seen, and emotionally available. Plus, in a special Dear Damona & Dear Nick segment, the two team up to answer your toughest love dilemmas—from long-distance moving logistics to mixed signals that never quite become dates. What you’ll learn: How to slide into DMs without overthinking it Why the “how we met” story isn’t as important as we think What men wish women knew about emotional safety How to handle a situationship that keeps circling back This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. Listen to Nick on The Viall Files podcast Follow him on the socials @nickviall Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Former First Lady Michelle Obama and her brother Craig Robinson, co-hosts of the IMO Podcast, join Damona for a compelling conversation on navigating connection in the digital age. Together, they share insights into how they maintain strong family bonds across long distances and the role of technology in bridging that gap. What You’ll Learn: How Michelle and Craig keep connected with loved ones despite busy schedules and miles apart The surprising benefits of texting vs. phone calls in sustaining relationships How to bring spontaneity back to phone conversations without overwhelming your schedule Why FaceTime and family Zoom calls became a lifeline during the pandemic—and how they continue to use them to stay close Practical tips for setting communication boundaries that promote genuine connection This conversation isn’t just about tech—it's about purposefully using it to deepen the relationships that matter most. Subscribe to get every new Dates & Mates episode as soon as it drops, and don’t miss Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson on the IMO Podcast, where they explore life, love, and everything in between with candor and warmth. Follow Michelle Obama @michelleobama Follow Craig Robinson @craigmalrob More about the IMO Podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Fan favorite, Jennifer Cook, bestselling author, and autism advocate shares her experience as the on-camera expert from the hit Netflix series Love on the Spectrum. In this conversation, Jennifer also opens up about her late-in-life autism diagnosis, the challenges of dating with a neurodivergent brain, and the surprising tools that can help anyone date with more clarity and compassion. What you’ll learn: How neurodiverse and neurotypical daters alike can build intentional communication Practical tools for managing sensory overwhelm on a date The subtle power of “tell me more” Why preparation and presence are the keys to connection This is the first episode of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates archives. Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available. Catch Jennifer in the latest season of Love on the Spectrum (streaming now on Netflix) Follow her @JenniferCook_Author More at: JenniferCookAuthor.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this special Master Class episode, Damona explains the effect that text-based communication has had on dating today. But rather than thinking of it as us losing the art of communication, she proposes that we consider it as gaining another language and expanding our skills. Prepare to develop a communication code of conduct that will hopefully lead you to a deeper, more meaningful connection! Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Laura Day, New York Times bestselling author, shares the insights within her upcoming book, “The Prism: Seven Steps to Heal Your Past and Transform Your Future”. Her transformational tools will put you back in the driver's seat of your life and lead you to healthier relationships with others and yourself. Our Dear Damona question of the week: Where do you draw the line between being too picky and settling? Pre-order your copy of Laura’s book,“The Prism: Seven Steps to Heal Your Past and Transform Your Future”, set to be released April 29th, by visiting lauraday.com/shop/ Follow Laura on Instagram @LauraDayIntuit Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Damona shares a rare peek behind the curtain of one of her private coaching sessions, with the client’s permission of course! Hear firsthand how she teaches her clients to use their own intuition in dating and beyond. Plus you’ll get to see exactly how Damona uses her own intuition while coaching singles in love from how to tune in, what to look and listen for, and exercises to get started yourself. Whether you’ve been ignoring your gut or just want to sharpen your instincts, this episode is going to help you reconnect with one of your most powerful dating tools—you. Interested in booking your own solo coaching session? Email Asst@DamonaHoffman.com or DM @damonahoffman on Instagram or Facebook! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Francesca Hogi, TED speaker and host of the Dear Franny podcast, introduces her new book, “How To Find True Love: Unlock Your Romantic Flow and Create Lasting Relationships.” Plus, she will break down her new definition of true love, dive deeper into the Fairy Tale Industrial Complex, explore her meet-cute mindset and so much more! Our Dear Damona question of the week: Dating apps keep feeding me the same old matches, so how do I meet someone IRL? Grab your copy of Francesca’s book, “How to Find True Love: Unlock Romantic Flow and Create Lasting Relationships”, by visiting FrancescaHogi.com/Book Follow Francesca on Instagram @DearFranny Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sharing a new show from our friends at Higher Ground, hosted by Michelle Obama, called IMO. On IMO, Michelle and her big brother Craig Robinson bring candid perspectives to the everyday questions shaping our lives, relationships and the world around us. Each week, they’re joined by a guest to tackle real questions from real folks just like you offering practical advice, personal storytelling, and plenty of laughs. And a lot of their questions are about dating and relationships. Michelle and Craig share stories about being there for each other throughout their lives, from first crushes and fraught college years, to landing at the White House, to losing their mom. For six decades they’ve been each others’ most trusted counsel—and now, they want to be that counsel for you. In this episode, renowned life coach and podcaster Jay Shetty joins Michelle and Craig to puzzle through a listener's question about professional ambition and dating. The trio discuss money in relationships, finding balance between work and romance, and Michelle shares her advice for choosing a life partner. They ask: Is the pursuit of perfection—in work or dating—worth it? You can hear more episodes of IMO at https://lnk.to/imomichellecraigDM Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In honor of their 18th wedding anniversary, Damona’s partner-in-life-and-love, Seth Hoffman, is joining her on the mic to do something they’ve never done before—answer your burning dating and relationship questions together! From first dates to commitment, conflict to chemistry, they’re bringing you the raw, unfiltered truth straight from the front lines of a long-term partnership with questions like: How heavy should outside opinions weigh on my relationship decisions? How do I get over my freeze response when attending singles events? What do I do when it feels like my partner isn’t listening anymore? How can I encourage a more positive mindset about dating in my friend group? I lost my spouse years ago and sometimes miss the companionship. How can I open up my heart to love? Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Amanda Pendleton, Zillow's Home Trends expert, examines whether shacking up with a partner actually saves you money—or if the emotional costs outweigh the benefits. Plus, we’ll explore how to decide when—or if—it’s the right time to merge your spaces and your finances. And later we answer this Dear Damona question of the week: How can you set up a new long-distance relationship for success? VisitZillow.com for all of your home buying needs. Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program The Dating Accelerator, for $50 off this month ONLY: DamonaHoffman.com/program Use the code: MARCH50 Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Beatriz Victoria Albina, Master Certified Somatic Life Coach, breaks down the ways a dysregulated nervous system might be getting in your way romantically, how to tune into the cues your body is sending you and how to heal ourselves for happier, healthier relationships. Then the Dear Damona question this week is: 15 years later, I find myself back in the dating pool. Where do I begin? Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program The Dating Accelerator, for $50 off this month ONLY: DamonaHoffman.com/program Use the code: MARCH50 Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mercury may be retrograde but we are moving forward on a new path to love with an All-Dear-Damona episode. This week’s questions came in from all over the globe: I’ve been told that men should do the chasing. Do I really have to sit around and wait? How do I keep my cool when matches ask questions that I’ve already answered in my dating profile? I’ve done a lot of inner work. How much can I reasonably expect a male match to have done? A famous singer-songwriter reached out to me on Instagram. How do I know if it’s the real deal? Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program The Dating Accelerator, for $50 off this month ONLY: DamonaHoffman.com/program Use the code: MARCH50 Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this jam-packed Master Class you’ll learn why apathy may be the reason you’re feeling burned out in dating and how empathy is the antidote. Damona shares why empathy makes you more attractive, how to cultivate it, and exercises to strengthen both self-empathy and relational empathy. Plus, our Dear Damona questions for the week include: Why are so many people less emotionally available than they say? How can we utilize roster dating for less burnout and better turnout? I used to find joy in dating. Now it feels like a chore. How can I find joy again? How can you get a nervous first date to open up and relax? We are giving away 3 audio book copies of F The Fairy Tale in celebration of 550 episodes of Dates & Mates! To enter, just share this episode on your social media and tag Damona @DamonaHoffman and you will be entered for a chance to get the F The Fairy Tale e-book. If you’re tired of dating burnout then it’s time to identify your dating loops and move on in love. For the entire month of March, we are giving you $50 off the Dating Accelerator! Just visit DamonaHoffman.com/Course and enter the code March50 Coming up next in the Dates & Mates lineup, we have an all Dear Damona so send in your questions! Submit them on any of the socials @ DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Johnny Fernandez, life and love coach, joins Damona to answer the question: is dating really harder today? This is a hot debate and it continues as Johnny and Damona put their four decades of collective experience to work. Whether you're feeling like dating is impossible, or just wondering if you’re doing it all wrong, if you’re intrigued by masculine/feminine dynamics or not, this episode is for you! Then we have this Dear Damona question of the week: After coming on strong, communication with my match has slowed. How do I know if he’s busy or lost interest? Book your tickets to an upcoming Love Breakthrough Live at radianceandcourage.com. The direct link will be in the show notes. You can learn more about Johnny and his wife Lara at @JohnnyAndLara LAST CALL for questions for the February Dear Damona episode! Submit your audio or written questions asap on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or on voicemail at 424-246-6255 TIMESTAMPS Introduction to Modern Dating Challenges (00:00:00) The Role of Love Coaching (00:01:06) Johnny's Journey into Love Coaching (00:02:20) Expectations in Modern Relationships (00:06:12) The Impact of Choice on Satisfaction (00:10:16) Effort Required in Today's Dating Landscape (00:12:16) The Importance of Romantic Relationships (00:13:18) Choosing Your Hard (00:15:04) Introduction to Modern Dating (00:15:13) The Rhetoric of Comparison (00:15:50) Awareness of Desire (00:17:02) Fundamentals of the 3D True Love Method (00:17:59) The Paradox of Choice in Dating (00:19:57) Societal Programming and Commitment (00:20:59) The Importance of Distinction (00:22:29) Focusing on Healthy Relationships (00:24:37) Authenticity in Dating (00:27:07) Quality vs. Quantity in Dating (00:29:28) The Reality of Romance (30:25) Accepting What You Allow (31:16) Understanding Self-Sabotage (31:28) Love Breakthrough Live Overview (31:57) Breaking Through Self-Limiting Beliefs (32:21) Unpopular Opinion on Hustle Culture (34:19) The Importance of Emotional Connection (35:00) Closing Thoughts and Resources (35:56) Listener Question Introduction (36:45) Advice for a Listener (37:17) Navigating Grief and Relationships (39:59) The Importance of Mutual Interest (41:24) Empathy and Understanding in Dating (42:30) Possibility of Future Love (45:04) Closing Remarks (46:14) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Lindsay Jill Roth, award winning television producer, shares her new book, “Romances & Practicalities: A Love Story (Maybe Yours) In 250 Questions”, how these questions and ultimately the communication they foster can determine the trajectory of a relationship. Then our Dear Damona question this week is: Is it time for a talk? My man keeps updating his online profile. Get the book: “Romances & Practicalities: A Love Story (Maybe Yours) In 250 Questions” and follow Lindsay on Instagram @LindsayJillRoth Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com TIMESTAMPS Introduction to Relationship Questions (00:00:00) Host Introduction (00:00:13) Lyndsey's Background (00:02:29) Creating the System (00:03:51) Importance of Communication (00:06:08) Finding Comfort in Asking Questions (00:07:43) Starting Points for Conversations (00:08:29) Timing for Relationship Discussions (00:10:35) Therapy Before Problems Arise (00:11:17) International Romance Story (00:11:44) Pivotal Moment in the Relationship (00:13:37) Creating the System from Experience (00:15:09) Vulnerability in Relationships (00:16:35) The Challenge of Modern Dating (00:17:06) Initial Connection Over Text (00:18:44) The Disappointment of Zero Chemistry (00:19:20) Researching a Potential Partner (00:20:04) Deliberate Communication Choices (00:21:12) Importance of Getting Offline (00:22:00) Book Structure and Relationship Progression (00:23:06) The Role of Money in Relationships (00:25:03) Communication as a Foundation (00:27:12) Understanding Conflict Styles (00:28:37) Self-Discovery Through Relationships (00:31:20) Future Aspirations and Relationship Impact (00:32:51) The Importance of Structure in Relationships (34:05) Defining Spirituality in Dating (34:41) The Value of Self-Reflection (35:51) Using Books as Relationship Tools (37:11) Revisiting Conversations in Long-Term Relationships (38:05) The Evolution of Relationship Conversations (39:00) Permission to Not Have All the Answers (39:30) Unpopular Opinions on Dating (41:10) The Need for Open Communication (41:39) Listener Question on Relationship Insecurities (43:21) Navigating Undefined Relationship Spaces (46:05) Taking the Initiative in Relationship Conversations (48:40) Exploring Serious Relationships (00:50:59) The Power of Vulnerability (00:52:07) Episode Wrap-Up and Resources (00:52:15) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Devyn Simone, Tinder’s Resident Relationship Expert, joins Damona in celebration of Valentine’s Day to test Damona’s online dating knowledge in a Tinder Trivia showdown! Whether you’re feeling the love or dodging Cupid’s arrow this year, we’ve got something for you. Then in a special Dear Damona and Dear Devyn, our questions this week are: My matches want to skip getting to know each other and get straight to the date. How do I deal with this? I keep getting ghosted. Am I coming on too strong? You can find Tinder in the App Store or the Google Play Store, and you can find Devyn on Instagram @DevynSimone *This is NOT a sponsored episode* Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com TIMESTAMPS Introduction to the Episode (00:00:00) Welcome to Dates and Mates (00:00:06) Introducing Devin Simone (00:02:05) Catch-Up Between Friends (00:02:41) Tinder Trivia Game Introduction (00:03:52) The Evolution of Online Dating (00:04:54) Importance of Hope in Dating (00:08:06) First Trivia Question: Tinder's Activity Day (00:09:07) Burnout in Dating (00:11:27) Maximizing Dating App Time (00:12:21) Momentum in Online Dating (00:14:14) The Importance of Phone Calls (00:14:28) Trivia Game Begins (00:15:26) Benefits of Tinder's Passport Feature (00:16:34) Changing Dating Parameters Post-COVID (00:17:05) Misconceptions About Dating Options (00:20:49) Investment in Dating Apps (00:23:44) Study on Men's Perceptions of Women (00:24:18) Reality of Men's Relationship Goals (00:27:08) Understanding Individual Relationship Seriousness (00:28:33) The Importance of Online Dating Opportunities (00:29:25) Trivia Game Introduction (00:30:08) Loud Looking Trend (00:31:14) Shift in Dating Culture (00:32:11) Self-Reflection in Dating (00:34:34) Profile Photo Selection (00:39:31) AI Photo Selector Tool (00:42:42) Tinder Data Insights (00:43:24) AI Tools for Profile Building (00:44:13) Using Data for Dating Ease (00:45:07) Support Beyond Profiles (00:45:42) Confidence through Tools (00:46:11) Quality of Relationships (00:46:59) Listener Questions Introduction (00:47:38) Handling Men on Dating Apps (00:48:43) Importance of Pre-Screening (00:49:33) Communication Methods (00:50:49) Scheduled Mini-Dates (00:52:12) Ghosting and Quality Connections (00:52:28) Assessing Dating Patterns (00:53:25) Self-Inquiry in Relationships (00:54:01) Defining Quality in Partners (00:56:00) Closing Remarks and Appreciation (00:56:54) Closing Remarks and Thanks (00:57:25) Valentine's Day Episode Mention (00:57:25) Upcoming Guest Announcement (00:58:32) Valentine's Day Wishes (00:58:32) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices