The Elephant Club Podcast

At a time where this is so important, James and I offer our 2 cents. First part recorded in quarantine with crap mic's, second part recorded pre quarantine with slightly less crap mics. Stay safe friends

Fred Hartsook has been local to Bellingham since 2003, worked in jobs from barista to youth ministry, to leading a Ugandan children's choir. Fred came on the podcast to discuss fatherhood, becoming a dad, and restoring relationships (specifically with his own father). Two things became clear to me during our conversation: 1. I really enjoy Fred's perspective and I like being around him. 2. I need to hang out with him more. Please enjoy Fred Hartsook (I know you will!)

Todays podcast is a real treat. Willow has been a good friend of both James and mine for a long time, and has been on the list of people we wanted to talk to since we started planning this podcast. Willow tells us her story, how it has influenced her marriage and parenting, and how she has been open with her kids about her past. Willow is founder and director of Collide here in Bellingham. It so happens that their winter conference is tonight. I wish I could say I planned to release this episode today to correspond...but its just a coincident. Please enjoy Willow Weston! *Note on this episode: we record in my living room, and sometimes I can't find childcare for the kids. In the last episode you can hear my two year old calling for me. The same is true in this one, you can also hear her yelling at her 10 year old sister for not letting her come out and get me. I try to keep it as quiet as I can but you'll still hear it.

Our first repeat guest. Amy sat in on the counselor panel we did early last year. She came back to talk about trauma, and the brain and body, and how they are all intermingled. We get into mindfulness and mantra toward the end, as well as walking with your kids through trauma. Amy and her family are close friends of our, it was a joy to interview her again, and I'm sure it wont be the last time. Note: We sometimes have to record at my home while my kids are there. You'll hear my 2 year old calling for me a couple times throughout this episode.

Holy cow, it feels like forever since we have been able to post an episode. We took a bit of an unplanned break over the holidays, but we are back for 2020 and have 3 great episodes to start the year off with. James and I had the opportunity to sit down with counselor Julie Hall and discuss trauma. More specifically working through trauma, and walking with loved ones as they work through their own trauma.

Actually let's talk about talking about sex. This is the first in what I hope is an ongoing series about sex and intimacy, and how to talk about it with your partner and with your kids. James and I discuss, in part, an episode of the Litergist podcast where the hosts discuss pornography, its effects, and the morality of it. If you haven't had a chance to listen to it I highly recommend it. I hope you enjoy!

I've known Jon since Bible school back in 2004. He continues to be one of my best friends (even though i've only seen him a handful of times in the last decade). Every conversation with Jon is authentic, open, and real. About a year ago Jon and I tried to start a podcast, we recorded a couple episodes but nothing ever came of it. I am hopeful he and I can resume that in the very near future (stay tuned). Until then please enjoy a conversation about silence.

This week we finish up our conversation with Autumn. If you haven't had a chance to listen to the last episode I highly suggest you do so! In part 2 we start talking about our relationship with food, body image, intuitive eating, fat shaming, and raising kids to have a healthy view of themselves and food. Enjoy!

This week we have the joy of talk with a local mom, wife, blogger, podcaster, and all around great person, Autumn Meyer. This was a longer interview so I've broken it up into two parts. In part one we talk a lot about family of origin and how that plays into parenting and conflict resolution with our partners. You can find Autumn at awholestory.com, or on facebook and instagram under that same name. You can also find her podcast wherever you listen to podcasts. Enjoy!

on August 30, 2009 at 1203am I became 'daddy' for the first time. It was at once joyful and terrifying. The weight of the world was on my shoulders. I not only had myself and my wife to care for, but now this tiny human, completely helpless. I remember staring at her while she slept, not quite believing that we had a child. James and I have 7 children between us aged 1.5yrs to 19yrs. We sat down early one morning to have a chat about what fatherhood means, about sacrificing what we think we need to do, about being present in the lives of our kids. By no means are we perfect in this, but rather strive to do better than before. Notes on this episode: We recorded pretty early in the am, not trying to excuse how tired we sound, we're just not morning people. We recorded in my living room while my 3 kids were up stairs. There are a couple times when they venture downstairs to tattle on each other, I tried to edit it all out but some still made it in there.

James wanted to title this episode 'My son is gay! (now what do I do?)'. I just titled it 'Jace Taylor'. Jace is a recent high school graduate, has been very involved in ASB and sports medicine, and (as the title implies) has come out as gay. Jace was gracious enough to sit down with his dad and me to talk about his journey of self discovery, coming out to his parents and family and his friends. We also talk about recent events where he was hired by a christian summer camp as a counselor then terminated because of his sexual orientation. I know we usually try to stay away from political or religious topics, and I know we dive deep into those areas in this episode. I ask that as you listen you come with an open mind, set aside (even for just an hour) any prejudice you may or may not have and listen to a young man talk about his struggle to find self. Enjoy Jace Taylor!

Skyler is a local teacher and basketball coach. He married his high school sweetheart and they have a daughter together. We kind of shotgun this interview, hitting a broad range of topics. We get in to family of origin, marriage, adoption, drug addiction, teen suicide, high schoolers and the world they live in. We didn't have time to get into any of the topics as deeply as James and I would have liked. Rest assured we will get Skyler back on the show!

Today we get to chat with local hero Charlie Hanson. Charlie is co owner of The Elizabeth Station (local beer, wine, and cider shop with lots of good things), and Primer (local coffee shop with real good coffee). Charlie was my boss (and James') at Starbucks. We chat about growing up conservative, choosing relationship over being right, marriage, fatherhood, adoption. I feel like we just scratched the surface with Charlie and will need to get him back. Enjoy!

Its my turn on the hot seat today. James sat down with me to get into my story, family of origin, marriage, parenthood... we get into it all. Hope you enjoy.

Relationships are like cars. If you do regular upkeep and maintenance, if you get your oil changed regularly and check in with the tech about what they, as a third party, are seeing under the hood and take preventative steps to correct problems, you probably wont have a breakdown. But if you ignore the mechanic, don't take any preventative measures, turn a deaf ear to noises and whines you're hearing, you might just throw a rod and have the whole thing blow up in your face. This week we took our recording gear to an elephant club gathering. James put together a 3 counselor panel for a little Q&A session. The conversation we had was incredible. Get out your note pad and pen, there are lots of nuggets of wisdom in here. Enjoy! Check out our panel at their websites: http://www.amybrandttherapy.com/ http://www.markdotson.com/ http://breezepotts.com

This week we are talking fatherhood with Matt Atkins. Matt is a husband, father of 5, and grandfather of 4. We talk about the many challenges our kids face growing up, and how we can walk that journey with them. On a technical note, this is the last episode we recorded using a single microphone for 3 people. There are some background noises (water glass being picked up/set down, me scratching my beard...etc) that may irritate you, the listener. They certainly did me as I edited the episode. All recordings after this episode have better technology and I will (hopefully) be able to get rid of most of those noises.

On todays episode we talk about depression, and the different forms it can take in different people. We interview Jayson Bradley about his journey with depression. Jayson is a writer and blogger. He brings a sense of openness, vulnerability, and humor to an otherwise stigmatized and somber topic.

In the first episode we have a conversation with cohost of the show James Taylor on what the Elephant Club is and why it's important. Why husbands and fathers need support, and the importance of vulnerability.