The Happya Life

Welcome to another episode of the Happya Life podcast. I'm your host Clare Deacon, and today, we're diving deep into the topic of anxiety and exploring strategies for finding inner peace. As Mental Health Awareness Week continues, it's essential to shine a light on the state of mental health in the UK, especially amidst the challenges brought about by the pandemic. We'll discuss the significance of positive psychology in navigating anxiety, share personal experiences, and provide actionable steps you can take to soothe your anxiety and reclaim your well-being. So, whether you're looking to manage your own anxiety or support a loved one, stay tuned for valuable insights and inspiration. Let's dive in!. Over the past few years, we've witnessed a concerning trend of deteriorating mental health among individuals in the UK. The pressures of modern life, coupled with the challenges brought about by the pandemic, have taken a significant toll on our well-being. The traditional mental health system often approaches mental health from an illness ideology, focusing solely on treating symptoms rather than addressing underlying causes which simply offer short-term relief only before issues come back more intensively. At Happya, we believe in a different approach. We're dedicated to providing resources and support to help you combat the effects of anxiety and other mental health challenges so that you can live a healthier, happier life. Our goal is to empower you to take control of your mental well-being and thrive, not just survive. Our approach is grounded in positive psychology, which focuses on building strengths and fostering resilience rather than just treating symptoms. Positive psychology offers a unique lens through which we can view mental health and well-being. Instead of dwelling on past traumas or problems, positive psychology encourages us to focus on our strengths, values, and aspirations. It's about moving forward, not getting stuck in the past. I understand firsthand the limitations of traditional therapy approaches when it comes to trauma. When I was going through my own process of recovery from trauma, I found myself continually swimming in my own swamp of trauma. I didn't want to spend sessions going over old wounds, reliving painful memories, but I did need to acknowledge them and let go in order to allow them to heal. That's where positive psychology made all the difference. Our trauma-informed approach at Happya acknowledges the impact of past traumas while also focusing on building resilience and fostering healing. It's about creating a safe space where you can explore your experiences without retraumatising yourself. We don't ignore the past, but we also don't let it define your future. I've seen countless individuals give up on therapy because they felt like it wasn't working or because they believed they were too broken to change. But the truth is, healing is possible, and positive psychology offers a pathway forward. It's about empowering individuals to reclaim their lives, to find joy and purpose even in the face of adversity. It isn’t them who have failed it is the system. No matter your starting point there are always going to be steps you will need to take to not only maintain but improve your wellbeing and during mental health awareness we are focusing on anxiety. Let's dive into our discussion about anxiety. Anxiety is a natural response to stress and can manifest in various ways, from persistent worry to physical symptoms like rapid heartbeat and muscle tension. While occasional anxiety is normal, chronic, or excessive anxiety can interfere www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

Discover the transformative insights from the latest Mental State of the World Report in 'The UK's Wellbeing Wake-Up Call and the Happya Solution' podcast episode. Unveiled findings show the UK near the bottom in global mental wellbeing rankings, highlighting the urgent need for change. This episode delves into the root causes of the UK's mental health challenges, from smartphone dependency to the breakdown of family units, and introduces the pioneering Happya philosophy as a vital remedy. Join me as we explore how adopting principles of positive psychology can rebuild our mental landscape, offering practical steps for individuals and society to flourish. Tune in to embark on a journey towards a happier, more fulfilling life with Happya. Ref: The Mental State of the World in 2023, Global Mind Project, March 4, 2024 Survival kit: https://www.happyacoach.com/survivalkit Navigate Your Happya Life Quiz: https://www.happyacoach.com/quiz The Happya Life Starter Guide: https://www.happyacoach.com/starter www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

Welcome to an exclusive conversation with me, Clare, the proud author of the No.1 bestselling book 'Blooming Happya'. Join me as I sit down with Odette Mould, the incredible founder of Harry's Rainbow, in anticipation of our upcoming Blooming Happya Charity Book Launch Party. This event is not just about celebrating the launch of my book; it's a heartfelt journey of resilience, inspiration, and giving back. As we delve into our personal stories of triumph over adversity and the profound impact of community support, we invite you to be part of this transformative experience. Our goal? To spread joy, inspire hope, and raise vital funds for Harry's Rainbow, a cause close to our hearts. Save the date: February 29, 2024, at Sultans Restaurant, Milton Keynes. Visit https://www.happyacoach.com/event to secure your tickets and join us in this unforgettable celebration of life, love, and Blooming Happya! www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

Well hello and welcome back so in today’s episode I’ve decided to do something a little different and wanted to share with you a meditation to help you free your mind from anxiety and worry. It’s a little different from our usual episode but hopefully something you will find beneficial. This mediation has been designed to release the feelings and thoughts that are no longer serving you. We are often held back from taking action, from allowing ourselves to be who we really are or to take a step towards our goals because of some hidden beliefs we are holding onto. We hold onto these beliefs through fear in the false belief that it will keep us safe. Now it’s time to let go. So, before we begin, I want you to make sure you won’t be disturbed, turn off your notifications and make yourself comfortable. This is your time. This meditation should only be played when it is safe to do so, it should not be played when driving or undertaking any other activity. I’d highly recommend listening to the mediation through headphones to enhance your experience but whatever is most comfortable for you. So, if you are ready, make yourself comfortable, and begin to concentrate on your breathing. Meditation Music: by NaturesEye from Pixabay / Echoes of the Forest Meditation www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

In this episode, we will be exploring the power of self-love, what it is and why it is important, the barriers to self-love and I will then be sharing some expert tips for building self-love a foundation for happiness. So, whether you are a seasoned practitioner of self-love or looking to improve the relationship you have with yourself I hope you find this episode helpful and inspiring. Self- Love is a critical component of our psychological wellbeing and a key factor in our ability to live a happy and fulfilling life. It’s about embracing our unique qualities, acceptance of our flaws, forgiveness of our mistakes and holding ourselves in positive regards, holding value in ourselves, and acknowledging our worth. 10 ideas for improving your self love. 1. Practice self care 2. Manage the self talk 3. Self reflect with journalling 4. Express gratitude 5. Spend time in nature 6. Treat yourself 7. Surround yourself with positive people 8. Learn something new 9. Set goals towards your dream 10. Engage in acts of kindness. Remember self-love and happiness are a journey, not a destination. It takes time to build a positive relationship with yourself, but with effort and dedication, you can find self-love and live a fulfilling life. Don't forget to join the SELF-LOVE CHALLENGE www.happyacoach.com/selflove Also, join us in The Happa Life Playgroup Facebook Group www.facebook.com/groups/thehappyalife www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

Whether it’s losing weight, quitting smoking, saving money, changing career, we all know the struggle of turning our good intentions into lasting change. It’s not just about having the willpower, it’s about understanding the science behind habit formation and learning from our past failures. In this episode I will be sharing with you how best to ensure you can change your habits and achieve your goals. So, whether you’re just setting out on your resolution journey or you’re feeling a little stuck, this podcast is here to help you make this year the year you finally achieve your goals. www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

Welcome back to another episode of the happy life podcast, this week I want to talk about the feelings of anxiety, stress and overwhelm especially at this time of year. I have been working with clients this week and catching up with my peers in business and am already seeing the impact this is having on people’s wellbeing. The demands of everyday life, with the worries of all that is going on in the world on top of the demands and expectations of the season are a lot to bear. In this episode of the Happya Life I am going to be talking to you about festive anxiety, why it happens, what it looks like and how you can support yourself, so you don’t arrive at Christmas day feeling drained. So, for those times when the anxiety is becoming too much here are 3 ways in which you attempt to reduce its impact on you. The first is a breathing technique, yes I want you to breathe and you will be surprised at how bad we are at something we do all day everyday! So. Get comfortable. Place one hand on your stomach and the other on your chest. Breathe in through your nose for the count of 4, deeply enough that the hand on your stomach rises. Hold the breath for a count of 4, and then exhale slowly through your mouth for the count of 6 as though you are breathing through a straw. Do this practice for a few minutes and you should feel the symptoms reduce. An alternative is to use muscle relaxation. Take yourself through process of tensing and releasing your muscles throughout the body. This is a technique I use in hypnotherapy. Using this technique will enable you to recognise feelings of anxiety by noticing where in your body your muscles feel really tense. Understanding your body’s signals means you can respond to them earlier and mastering these techniques will enable you to release the tension that much quicker. A third technique is to Challenge the irrational thinking This is a technique used in therapy when you have a triggering thought you explore that thought against your rationale logic. Ask yourself is my thinking based on fact or feeling? How likely is it that my fear will happen? What is most likely to happen? If my fear did come true, how would I handle it? By using a rational thought process, it can assist in gaining perspective and a sense of control. Hopefully these will help you in managing those symptoms and enable you to find some release. Top tips 1. When these feelings arise – acknowledge them, understand what they are telling you so you can provide the reassurance you need. 2. Increase your self-care at this time of year, we all need a little more love and attention. 3. Decide what is important to you this festive season and establish your boundaries accordingly. 4. Be prepared for situations where you are aware you may be triggered. 5. Prioritise your schedule so you avoid overwhelm and burnout. 6. Reach out for support, delegate, and importantly accept help! 7. Give yourself permission to say NO! Don't forget there is still time to join the Treat your self Challenge www.happyacoach.com/treatyourself www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

Links in this episode: Treat Your SElf Challenge; www.happyacoach.com/treatyourSElf Happya Life 90 Day Wellbeing Journal Click HERE www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

It can be so difficult to get motivated and gain momentum especially when you feel like there is a mountain ahead of you or perhaps you can’t even see the mountain because you are surrounded by a fog. The past few years have been a huge energy drain for many of us. It has left a lot of us feeling sluggish and to be honest the near future looks like its going to continue to be challenging for many. It’s a time when we want to go into hiding to succumb to our fears and wait for the storm to pass. But this isn’t the time for inaction this is the time when we need take steps to look after our mental wellbeing. Never has it been more important. So here are five steps and they are all simple steps so no excuses for getting started, no need to challenge them just get started. Firstly, I want you to consider your commitment to your wellbeing and taking care of you. How do you want to think, feel, and show up for life? What investment are you prepared to make in supporting yourself – this doesn’t have to be financial it may mean committing as little as 10 minutes a day to taking action to improve your wellbeing. Tune into the episode to find out more... Finally, I want you to start a gratitude jar where each day you write down at least 3 things you are grateful for, put them in the jar and on days when things just seem hard, and you are finding yourself lost you can take out some of the papers and read what you have to be grateful for. Find the FREE Gratitude Journal here along with other resources www.happyacoach.com/links Purchase the Happya Life Journal 90 Days of Wellbeing https://www.amazon.co.uk/Happya-Life-Journal-Days-Wellbeing/dp/B0BLR6TT15/ref=sr_1_6?crid=2RTN18P7O7XDE&keywords=happya+journal&qid=1668093107&sprefix=happy+journal%2Caps%2C64&sr=8-6 www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

Sometimes we invite people to offer their opinion on a decision we are making, other times people offer their unsolicited opinions either indirectly or directly. You are a free and independent person who is capable of determining how you want to live, of living a life that is best for you. Sometimes you will find people who will try and tell you how you should live, what you should do and we may not want to disappoint them but we need to stand strong. This is not their life. They have a different set of values, a different set of goals, a different view of the world. So this week instead of taking onboard the opinions and values of others I want you to think about how you feel about your life, how you want to live, what your instinct is telling you about what you want to do. Do you feel calm? Do you feel energised by what you are doing? Are you being kind? If you can answer yes to these questions, you can be assured that even if others have a different view, it doesn’t matter, as long as you are enjoying your life and being kind, you are on the right path. You may have spent a lifetime trying to please others, to live up to their standard but it never works, it doesn’t make you or them happy. It doesn’t allow you or them to grow. So, make a decision to live a life that makes you feel good. Even though others may have opinions – let them go. Love. Accept. Respect. Trust yourself in the decisions you are making and if at any point you make a wrong decision you learn from it and you forgive yourself. If you are looking for some support with your own wellbeing reach out, email me clare@happyacoach.com or dm me @happyacoach. For those of you who want to explore further your own values and beliefs, if you are feeling detached from your life and want to build greater clarity and assurance of who you are then take a look at my recently published workbook and journal on Amazon Reconnect to a Happya Life. If you check out www.happyacoach.com/reconnectworkbook you will find all the information. I will leave the links in the description for this episode. www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

So what is it that holds us back? Simply making the commitment to make the change is not enough, wanting it is not enough. You have to truly believe that you can make it happen and on a surface level you may think you have this box ticked you may hold a believe that you can do this but what you wont be conscious of are those hidden beliefs you hold. The decluttering process allows you to unlock those beliefs you are holding onto of which you may or may not be aware of so you can get closer to what you truly want. Letting go of your self-limiting beliefs enables you to close the gap between what you believe you can or should do (watch out for the should)! And what you actually want to achieve. Closing the gap enables you to continue on your journey towards success without having to rely on willpower to enable you to leap over the gap. If you do attempt to override the system, the likelihood is you will fall through the gap. So how do we close the gap? How can we do that decluttering process? Here are 3 steps you can take in the decluttering process; these steps will help close the gap in the path so you can continue your journey. These steps are an ongoing process you will constantly discover new beliefs you weren’t aware you have and as you grow and move forward to the next level you will find yourself needing to go through the stages again. Step 1 Uncover what those limiting beliefs are – pull out the boxes and see what they contain Step 2 Send the contents away make the conscious decision to let go of them. Step 3 Fill the boxes with the contents – the belief system that is going to support you in achieving your goals. www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

In today’s episode I really want to explore something that I hear so often. It seems commonplace to get to a point in one’s life where we become a little bit lost and disconnected from who we are. I often ask clients ,whatever reason has brought them to come and see me, I ask them what they want. And for some this can be a huge barrier, one which sometimes we are not even be aware of and it can be quite uncomfortable to realise that, for some this will ignite the defence mechanism we have engineered whilst others may feel a little stuck and we have to work at uncovering what it is for them. Obviously, there are those that come to me for coaching and are looking for accountability towards achieving their goals and they often have more clarity over what they want but even so we usually uncover something where they’re not quite sure why they want it, and it turns out its more of a should statement. It’s inevitable really that overtime we become conditioned to our environment and the expectations of society and our local community. The people we surround ourselves by help shape our views but with each of the inputs coming into our world means we compromise our thoughts and even our emotions are no longer pure and we can loose sight of what is truly our own wants, needs, desires, and feelings. For those of you who are empaths you will be susceptible to taking on board other peoples feelings and emotions to a much greater depth than others. If you spend time with enthusiastic and energised people you will feel that too in a way that makes it difficult to distinguish the difference between what is their energy and what is your own. Which can certainly have its benefits but there’s also a consequence where you may take on feelings of stress and overwhelm that aren’t yours, you may feel angry and not sure why because it isn’t your anger to be felt it is someone else’s so its really important to be aware of what you take on board from others. So, on our life journey there are many twists and turns and we enter into different relationships and we may become parents or work in different environments and different cultures and experience different things, all that shapes the way we think and inevitably we find ourselves compromising to fit in, to be part of the community. Social media is obviously another really strong influence in our lives these days but before painting it as the devil we need to remember that we have always had these external influences whether it was television or gaming or radio, and newspapers. Any form of media will shape our views and not only is it important that we are aware of the source of this information and how that shapes the messages being given but we also need to be conscious of our own identity and our own beliefs. There is only so much information that can be held in the conscious part of our brains, so every piece of information needs to be assessed as to whether it gets taken on board and our brain very quickly files it! So, anything considered not of value is forgotten, anything not considered an immediate need is put into a store and the information is blended into what is already exists. Stop shoulding all over yourself! Forget what you should do. If it comes with a should then perhaps you shouldn’t! www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

This week saw mental health hitting the headlines with World Mental Health Day the aim of the day is to try and normalise discussions about mental health and wellbeing and to remove the shame and stigma that exists. So, in recognition of World Mental Health day and those individuals who held a space of non judgement I wanted to explore the judgement around mental health today. The importance of mental health is something I champion. From my own experience I spent decades holding onto my emotions, hiding from them, squashing them down and building layer upon layer of personality traits to distort from the true version of myself. I employed defence mechanisms that I thought were keeping me safe but were really just keeping the damage on the inside until it had taken hold and would then result in me struggling to cope, retreating or displaying irrational behaviours which then added to those feelings of not being good enough. I was aware I needed help, but it was never my priority. I would set out with all good intentions especially around a new year / new me mantra, but nothing really changed because I wasn’t committed to the action I needed to take. I wasn’t willing to do the hard work. Whilst I continued to hide I thought I was safe, that if I hid from the reality then somehow it just wouldn’t be true. I thought I was being strong for holding on. I thought that if I let go everything would just crumble and I wouldn’t be able to get back again. The reality of course is that by letting go the things that were not supporting me, the things that were doing the damage were released and sent away and the true me, all my positive traits, my strength, my true character were able to breathe, they were able to grow. If we truly want to change how people perceive mental health and investment in our psychological wellbeing, we all have a responsibility to change our perceptions and what it means to be undertaking the work to exercise our minds. We need to replace those feelings of not being good enough, feelings of shame and vulnerability with feelings of pride, empowerment, of drive and motivation, to be happier, to be bold and brave and strong. So, if you feel brave enough and safe enough perhaps you can take a moment to hit your social media with a post that says how important it is to work on your own wellbeing and share how you look after your own mental health. What do you do in terms of your own self-care? If you tag me into your post and send me a dm and I will happily send you a something free that will support you on your journey. There isn’t a top athlete that doesn’t have a psychologist that they work with continuously. Without undertaking that work, without investing their time and money into their mental health they would not be able to reach their physical goals. Attitude, mindset, and mental wellbeing are a fundamental part of the mind body system, if either are not fully fit it is impossible to reach that no.1 position. Working on your mental health isn’t only useful when you are in a state of stress, when you have hit a block or are in crisis, it enables us to improve our wellbeing so we can live happier more fulfilling lives, it enables us to grow and to reach our potential. If you are looking for some support with your own mental health reach out, email me clare@happyacoach.com or dm me @happyacoach check out my website www.happyacoach.com to find free resources www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

In this podcast episode we explore the feelings of not being good enough and on occasion maybe we are even a bit too much. Find out how you can be holding yourself back from living your best life. So if you want to improve your self-esteem and feelings of being good enough, take time to acknowledge your story, understand the source of those beliefs, challenge the judgements you hold and ensure you have appropriate boundaries in place. Then start listening to your needs and stop playing small – its time to take action and live your best life. For those who want to explore further a number of the topics I have discussed in this podcast episode form part of the reconnect programme, if this is something you would like understand more about, get in touch. I will shortly be opening up a few more spaces where we explore all those feelings of self-doubt and help you reconnect with your inner power so you can identify your true passions and get yourself ready for the life you want to live. If you want to know more contact me on Insta @happyacoach or email clare@happyacoach.com www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

In this episode I am going to give you an overview of the podcast and what you can expect as well as some insight into my personal journey and what has inspired me towards living a happya life. So, whether you fear judgement or rejection. So, who am I and what makes me qualified to do all that? I am a positive psychology coach and therapist an entrepreneur and the proud owner of Happya. In recovering from trauma and playing small, conforming to others’ expectations I set out on a journey to change my life and I have never looked back. The journey wasn’t easy, but it’s one that led me to living authentically, with a passion for what I do. Feeling more energised, confident, and aligned to my life. I honour my emotions and feel empowered to keep taking bold action and continue my journey towards success. I hope it is one which will inspire you to embrace your superpowers and fuel your desire and take action. www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio

Welcome to the happya life podcast, I’m Clare Deacon a positive psychology coach and therapist, founder of the happya life wellbeing programme, a no.1 best selling author, entrepreneur, mum, and thriver. After experiencing tragedy, I knew a life of just surviving wasn’t going to be enough, so I set out on a journey to transform my life. A life where I can thrive, not just for me but for my family. And now I’m on a mission to help others flourish encouraging you to take a positive proactive approach to your mental health and wellbeing, to feel good and live your best life. After all you only get one chance at this and with all the challenges we face in the world a life worth living is worth living well. In this podcast I will challenge you to take action, to release yourself from what is holding you back. Transport yourself from a life of procrastination, fear and overwhelm to a life where you are empowered. Check out www.happyacoach.com for further resources and how I can help you. www.happyacoach.com/links Email me at: clare@happyacoach.com DM @happyacoach Music by LemonMusicStudio