Better Sex

In a soapbox episode, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman responds to an email from a listener whose wife says she isn’t interested in fixing their sex life and accuses him of only caring about sex. Jessa explains there can still be hope and outlines three areas to explore: the overall relationship (conflict, lack of emotional connection, feeling like roommates), the couple’s entrenched desire-difference dynamics (pressure, focusing on frequency, treating the lower-desire partner as the problem, goal-oriented sex that creates obligation), and individual factors affecting the lower-desire partner (stress, exhaustion, mental health, parenting demands). She encourages higher-desire partners to build connection, show compassion for the guilt and shame lower-desire partners often feel, reduce pressure, and invite conversations about what’s in the way so intimacy can become fulfilling for both. 00:00 Show Intro 00:46 Soapbox Setup 01:01 The Unsubscribe Email 02:37 Three Hopeful Angles 02:39 Rebuild Connection First 03:50 Desire Difference Traps 04:54 Compassion Over Pressure 08:00 Life Stress Blocks Desire 08:54 Closing Hope and Next Steps 09:43 Outro and Credits Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

Sex therapist Jess Zimmerman interviews biohacker and author Jay Campbell about hormone optimization and metabolic health as foundations for wellbeing, longevity, libido, and sexual function. Campbell shares how discovering very low testosterone after a sports injury led him into researching therapeutic hormones, peptides, and lifestyle interventions, eventually writing bestselling books and a new book on GLP-1 peptides and proper microdosing with supportive lifestyle changes. They discuss endocrine disruption, common hormone deficiencies, and key labs and hormones to assess—especially free testosterone, estradiol, and progesterone—emphasizing women being underserved in testosterone therapy after the WHI. Campbell outlines symptoms like fatigue, low dopamine/brain fog, belly fat, and insulin resistance, and recommends insulin-controlled eating, resistance and cardio training, stress reduction through daily mind-stilling practices, and consistent routines to improve health and sexual wellbeing. 00:00 Show Intro 00:46 Meet Jay Campbell 01:48 Testosterone Wake Up Call 03:26 Biohacking To Author 05:43 Endocrine Disruptors 07:53 Metabolic Health Link 08:33 Key Hormones Explained 10:28 Women And HRT Myths 16:02 Microdosing GLP One 17:08 Midroll And Coaching 17:37 Symptoms And Sex Signs 19:29 Therapeutic Hormone Jumpstart 20:39 Libido and Sexual Function 23:14 Biohacker vs Clinical Goals 23:45 Diet and Insulin Control 25:37 Training for Longevity 28:23 Blue Zones and Leanness 29:04 Incline Walking for Fat Loss 30:24 Stress and Stilling Mind 34:39 Where to Find Jay 35:52 Podcast Wrap Up Want to work with Jessa? Visit https://www.intimacywithease.com Bio: Jay Campbell is a 5x international bestselling author, globally recognized authority on hormone optimization, metabolic health, and longevity. He’s passionate about educating individuals on how to optimize their hormones and metabolism for long-term vitality, energy, and performance. Jay’s work helps people break free from conventional “sick-care” systems and embrace health strategies that promote longevity, peak performance, and overall well-being. He is widely recognized for his cutting-edge insights into peptides, metabolic repair, and sustainable aging. jaycampbell.com/free-info biolongevitylabs.com JAYC code Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman shares a soapbox episode on three common apology mistakes that prevent real relationship repair. First, apologizing too quickly can skip the empathy your partner needs to feel understood, so she encourages “climbing into their movie” before taking accountability. Second, phrases like “I’m sorry you feel that way” or “I’m sorry that happened to you” misuse “I’m sorry,” which she reserves for responsibility and remorse, and can sound judgmental; she suggests using clearer empathic language instead. Third, adding “but” after an apology turns it into an explanation or excuse that undermines repair, so an apology should fully own the specific behavior and its impact. 00:00 Show Intro 00:46 Soapbox Setup 01:22 Mistake One Too Fast 02:51 Mistake Two Misusing Sorry 04:31 Mistake Three Sorry But 05:25 Wrap Up Take Ownership 05:51 Outro And Credits Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Darshana Avila (featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & Goop) about “erotic wholeness,” defined as integrating all parts of ourselves and relating to eroticism as life-force vitality that can fuel sexuality, creativity, and relationships. They explore how people-pleasing functions as a protective strategy—suppressing authenticity to maintain connection—and how it undermines both pleasure and intimacy. In long-term relationships, this often appears as partners (often women in heterosexual dynamics) not knowing what they like, feeling shame about needs such as taking longer to warm up, or fearing rejection for expressing desires. They discuss sexual scripts, shame, disappointment tolerance, consent (including Betty Martin’s Wheel of Consent), and practical steps: identify people-pleasing, work with fear/scarcity, clarify authentic desires and boundaries, and build communication skills with professional and relational support. 00:00 Show Introduction 00:49 Meet Darshana Avila 01:51 Her Path to This Work 03:26 Erotic Wholeness Defined 06:18 Choiceful Self Leadership 07:32 People Pleasing Explained 09:08 How It Shows Up in Sex 12:41 Owning Desire Without Shame 15:16 Rewriting the Sex Script 18:19 Mid Episode Quiz Break 18:47 Mutuality Helps Both Partners 19:38 Mutual Desire Basics 20:24 People Pleasing Blocks Intimacy 21:26 Building Disappointment Tolerance 22:18 Shame Spirals and Meaning 23:03 Dont Yuck the Yum 23:38 Golden Shower Lesson 24:42 Responding with Gratitude 25:19 Finding the Venn Overlap 27:19 Consent and the No 28:36 No as a Pivot 29:36 First Steps to Change 33:08 Vulnerability as Litmus Test 35:47 Support and Where to Find Her 36:55 Podcast Wrap Up My quizzes can be found at https://www.desirediscrepancy.com Bio: Darshana Avila is a trauma-informed somatic educator, practitioner and international speaker who helps people reconnect with the most essential aspects of themselves — their truth, their desires, and their capacity for profound pleasure and power. Known for her grounded, candid, and relational approach, she bridges the worlds of embodiment, emotional intelligence, and personal agency with depth and accessibility. Darshana’s work has been featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & goop, The Guardian, The New Yorker, and numerous leading podcasts. Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this soapbox episode of The Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the power of staying positive by questioning the stories and interpretations our brains create. She explains how people often react to filtered, meaning-filled perceptions rather than reality, then reinforce negative narratives—especially in relationships—by focusing on blame, hopelessness, and how stuck things feel. Jess argues this mindset is inaccurate, disempowering, and self-sabotaging because it shapes how we show up with our partners and invites defensiveness, conflict, or withdrawal. She encourages listeners to develop skepticism about their interpretations, broaden perspective, and choose thoughts and emotions that feel better and create more possibility. By focusing on what’s on “your side of the court,” including how you feel, think, and act, you can change the relational dynamic and move toward the connection you want. 00:00 Welcome to Better Sex 00:44 Soapbox Episode Setup 01:55 Why Stories Trap Us 03:35 The Cost of Negative Narratives 05:19 Challenge Your Interpretation 07:18 Control Your Side 07:42 Invitation to Shift Mindset 08:12 Outro and Credits Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman interviews Mandy Salley of the Woodhull Foundation about sexual freedom as a human right rooted in bodily autonomy and the ability to say yes or no. Mandy shares how peer sex education in college, graduate training in social work and human sexuality, and years volunteering with Woodhull led to her advocacy work blending sexuality, policy, and activism. They discuss how shame-based sex education limits curiosity and knowledge, and how free speech and online censorship affect sexual health information. Mandy outlines Woodhull’s current policy work, including opposing a proposed South Carolina abortion ban, Colorado’s trans bathroom ban, and state age-verification laws that threaten privacy and data security. She also notes concerns about intersex medical interventions and gender-affirming care bans. The episode ends with practical ways to get involved locally and how to find Woodhull’s resources. 00:00 Show Intro 00:56 Meet Mandy Sally 01:52 Her Path to Woodhull 06:17 Sex Ed Gaps and Shame 09:50 Defining Sexual Freedom 11:06 Censorship and Algo Speak 13:12 Quick Quiz Break 13:39 US vs Global Perspectives 17:02 Woodhull Policy Priorities 18:20 Age Verification and Privacy 22:46 Intersex and Care Bans 23:51 How to Get Involved 26:42 Find Woodhull Resources 28:55 Closing and Credits Take my quizzes at https://www.desirediscrepancy.com Bio: Mandy Salley brings her passion for social justice and love for humanity to the Woodhull Freedom Foundation as its Chief Operations Officer (COO). Since 2014 when she first served as a volunteer coordinator, Mandy plays an integral role at Woodhull, now managing its day-to-day operations and community efforts – from its Human Rights Commissions to the monthly Censorship of Sexual Freedom Series. Mandy is also a licensed Social Worker and has experience in inpatient hospitals, geriatric day programs, and rape crises. She is based in Brooklyn, NY. www.woodhullfoundation.org Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this soapbox episode of the Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman explains why some couples may benefit from a couples intensive instead of weekly or biweekly therapy. She describes limits of short, spaced-out sessions—often spent catching up or addressing the latest conflict—and how real emotional breakthroughs can require uninterrupted time for nervous systems to settle, vulnerability to emerge, and old patterns to loosen. Jessa outlines how intensives provide extended, immersive hours that allow couples to stay in the process long enough to repair ruptures and gain a clearer “balcony view” of their dynamics while practicing new behaviors with in-the-moment support. She also discusses the potential for ethically guided altered-state work—specifically mentioning MDMA and psilocybin training—to reduce fear-based defenses, increase empathy, and enable difficult conversations without typical shutdown or blame. Jessa shares who might consider an intensive (repeating conflicts, unresolved rupture, separation decisions, or a desire for deeper connection) and who should not (abuse, an unwilling partner, or severe mental health issues). She emphasizes intensives are a significant investment of time, money, and energy—often 6–10 hours—but can be transformative when regular therapy hasn’t created enough traction. 00:00 Show Intro 00:46 Why Consider Intensives 01:07 Limits of Weekly Therapy 02:22 How Intensives Work 03:24 Breaking Old Patterns 04:23 Insight Into Action 05:05 Altered State Options 05:50 MDMA and Psilocybin 06:21 What Changes in Session 07:32 Who Should Consider It 08:01 When Not Recommended 08:44 Cost and Commitment 09:13 Wrap Up and Credits Want to learn more? Visit https://www.heartweaveforcouples.com Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

Jessa Zimmerman interviews Jillian Wisborg, founder of Booby Grow, about a natural breast growth and firming program combining herbal supplementation, breast/nipple massage, and nutrition changes. Jillian shares that she created the program after losing weight and losing breast volume, and wanted an alternative to implants due to cost, maintenance, and reported health issues. She explains her background studying herbal medicine, how she researched plant compounds and breast health, and how her formulation evolved through trials into a lifestyle-based approach when some participants needed adequate calories and fat intake for results. The conversation covers what breasts are made of, the role of healthy fats, circulation, and estrogen receptors, and why the program emphasizes daily massage and specific herbs. They discuss broader effects some users report (without official claims), cautions around pregnancy and cancer, and an explanation of different estrogen sources including xenoestrogens and phytoestrogens. 00:00 Welcome to the Better Sex Podcast (Show Intro) 00:44 Meet Jillian Wisborg & Booby Grow: Natural Breast Firming/Growth Overview 01:34 Jillian’s Origin Story: Weight Loss, Losing Breast Volume & Avoiding Implants 05:57 From Herbal Medicine to a Formula: Researching Plant Compounds & Early Trials 10:10 Breast Biology 101: Fat, Circulation, Massage & Estrogen Receptors 12:55 Beyond Breast Size: Other Reported Benefits + Who Shouldn’t Use It 14:44 Safety Talk: Estrogen, Xenoestrogens vs Phytoestrogens & Cancer Concerns 19:16 Is This for the Male Gaze? Choice, Body Autonomy & Postpartum Clients 21:46 Dragons’ Den/Shark Tank Experience: Pitching Booby Grow & Calls for Studies 25:31 How the Program Works: 4-Month Plan, Guarantee, Results & Maintenance 28:25 Where to Find Jillian + Final Wrap-Up Interested in resources to bridge desire discrepancy? Go to https://www.desirediscrepancy.com Bio: I’m Jillian Wisborg — a Herbalist, Registered Nutritionist, and Clinical Iridoloist who’s been rooted in the holistic health world since 2009. Jillian had her company Boobygrow recently featured on the show Dragon’s Den & is taking the world by storm to enrich the masses on education of herbalism for vitality. Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this soapbox episode of The Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman responds to a coaching-call question: whether to tell a partner when you’ve taken Viagra. She describes a client who has a prescription, experiences no negative side effects, and has been taking the medication without telling his wife to avoid creating pressure or expectations for sex. Jessa explains that Viagra helps maintain an erection rather than automatically causing one, so taking it without having sex isn’t inherently harmful, but guessing can lead to mismatches—sometimes he’s prepared and sometimes he isn’t—potentially leaving his wife confused or personalizing inconsistent erections. She suggests considering a daily medication like Cialis for more spontaneity and encourages an honest conversation that leads with the intention to avoid pressure, clarifies there are no adverse effects if sex doesn’t happen, and invites the partner into shared decision-making, including the option for the partner to initiate by suggesting he take a pill if she’s interested in sex. She closes by encouraging listeners to communicate in ways that reduce pressure while increasing collaboration and connection. 00:00 Welcome to Better Sex (Podcast Intro) 00:45 Soapbox Topic: Should You Tell Your Partner You Took Viagra? 01:35 The Real Issue: Guessing, Mixed Signals & Partner Anxiety 02:08 Quick Viagra Myth-Busting: What It Does (and Doesn’t) Do 03:31 Practical Options: Daily Cialis vs. Planning Ahead 03:55 How to Bring It Up Without Creating Pressure 05:01 Invite Your Partner In: Shared Decision-Making & Desire Signals 05:59 Wrap-Up: Communicate About ED Meds as a Team 06:18 Outro, Links, Reviews & Credits Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman speaks with Candace Sjogren about the intricacies and common mistakes involved in polyamory, as addressed in Sjogren’s book, 'Polyagony'. They discuss personal experiences, motivations behind polyamorous relationships, and essential strategies for maintaining healthy open relationships. The conversation touches on setting boundaries, ethical non-monogamy, agreements, and navigating the dynamics of multiple partners, including poly parenting. Sjogren emphasizes the importance of communication, consent, and the continuous evolution of relationship agreements. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:49 Guest Introduction: Candace Sjogren on Polyamory 01:25 Candace's Personal Journey with Polyamory 02:13 Challenges and Advocacy in Polyamorous Relationships 03:34 The Rise of Ethical Non-Monogamy 07:09 Defining Ethical Non-Monogamy 08:33 Common Mistakes in Open Relationships 12:42 Forming Agreements in Open Relationships 16:43 Exploring Hopes and Fears in Relationships 16:59 The Importance of Moving at the Slowest Pace 17:30 Maintaining Relationship Cadence 18:02 Invitation to Share Personal Stories 18:31 Dealing with Stagnation in Relationships 20:19 Understanding Consent Within and Outside the Couple 22:26 Navigating the Role of a Hinge in Polyamory 25:04 Challenges of Poly Parenting 28:31 Group Dynamics in Polyamory 30:12 Conclusion and Resources If you want to share your story on the show, email us at info@intimacywithease.com Bio: Candace Sjogren is a lawyer, entrepreneur, and transformational leader whose work spans finance, technology, and human development. Born in Cincinnati, Ohio, she graduated from the Salmon P. Chase College of Law and practiced law before founding and leading multiple mission-driven companies. She served as CEO of Bad Girl Ventures, a microfinance firm investing in female founders, and later founded Somolend, one of the first nationally available crowdfunding platforms. Through this work, Candace played a key role in shaping the JOBS Act, the legislation that made securities-based crowdfunding legal in the United States. Over the past fifteen years, Candace has served in senior executive and C-suite roles across venture-backed startups and global payments companies, including Chief Commercial Officer of Lynx, a healthcare payments company, and Senior Vice President of Embedded Finance at FIS, a global payments firm with more than 66,000 employees. She is also the former co-author of Typhoon Honey: The Only Way Out Is Through, a book on emotional intelligence and transformational growth. Today, Candace leads The Liberation Company, where she facilitates emotional intelligence, somatic healing, and identity-based workshops designed to support deep personal and collective transformation. She lives on Cape Cod, Massachusetts, with her husband Andrew, their son Ivar, and their two dogs, Pan and Cinder. Website: https://www.polyagony.com YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@candacesjogren7056 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/insidethemindofcandaceklein/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/candacesjogren/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/candace.klein/ Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging...

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the challenges of setting quotas for sexual frequency in relationships. She shares insights from a recent coaching call, emphasizing that focusing on frequency can often lead to feelings of obligation and resentment, particularly for lower desire partners. Instead, Jessa advises couples to create flexible, pressure-free spaces to nurture desire and intimacy naturally. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:46 Welcome and Episode Overview 01:02 Discussing Reasonable Amounts of Sex 02:11 The Problem with Setting Quotas 04:05 Creating Flexibility in Intimacy 05:09 Avoiding Obligation and Duty 05:37 Conclusion and Final Thoughts 05:59 Closing Remarks and Listener Engagement 06:47 Credits and Acknowledgements Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of Better Sex, host and sex therapist, Jessa Zimmerman, interviews Dr. Evan Goldstein, an expert in anal sexual wellness and author of 'Butt Seriously.' Dr. Goldstein discusses the fundamentals of anal sex for beginners, focusing on key aspects such as muscle relaxation, preparation, and safety. They delve into common myths around anal sex, the anatomical considerations, and the importance of using the right products for a pleasurable experience. The conversation also explores the performance of safe hygiene practices, effective communication with partners, and techniques to mitigate potential issues. Dr. Goldstein emphasizes the importance of proper education and preparation to enhance the anal sex experience, debunking societal taboos and misconceptions. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:48 Exciting Topic: Anal Sex for Beginners 01:32 Meet Dr. Evan Goldstein 02:50 The Birth of Bespoke Surgical 03:46 Common Anal Issues and Myths 06:40 Anal Play for All Genders 08:21 Understanding Anal Anatomy 14:01 The Future Method and Anal Dilating Kit 20:45 The Importance of Uniformity in Vaginal Dilators 21:33 Jessa's Quick Break: How to Get Help 22:01 Misconceptions About Anal Preparation 22:35 Solo Anal Play: Learning Your Body 23:20 Incorporating Dilators into Sex Play 24:17 Positions for Anal Success 26:56 Choosing the Right Lube for Anal Sex 29:06 Gut Health and Anal Play 31:48 Douching: Best Practices and Misconceptions 34:59 Post-Play Hygiene Tips 36:36 Final Thoughts and Resources Want to work with Jessa? https://www.intimacywithease.com Bio: Dr. Evan Goldstein is the leading anal health expert in the United States, founder of Future Method, and one of the few surgeons in the world whose practice, Bespoke Surgical, is dedicated to treating and restoring the human butt. He holds a perennial spot on the list of top doctors for the New York metro area and Crain’s New York Business listed him as one of their notable LGBTQ+ leaders and executives. He has been featured in national publications including GQ, Well+Good, Men’s Health, Cosmopolitan, New York Magazine, Forbes, Fast Company, Out, and Shape; is a popular podcast guest; and in demand as a speaker for both medical and sex-positive industries. His first book, Butt Seriously: The Definitive Guide to Anal Health, Pleasure, and Everything In Between published in May 2024. www.bespokesurgical.com www.futuremethod.com www.buttseriously.com Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, hosted by sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman, the focus is on the concept of love languages and their impact on intimate relationships. Zimmerman discusses the common misunderstanding that having 'touch' as a love language equates to a need for sex, and how this misconception can create pressure and resistance in relationships. She emphasizes the importance of exploring various kinds of touch and incorporating all love languages into a satisfying sexual relationship. Listeners are encouraged to visit the podcast's website for show notes and additional episodes, and to rate and review the show on iTunes. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:55 Exploring Love Languages and Touch 02:15 Misconceptions About Love Languages and Sex 02:49 Integrating Love Languages into Sex 03:38 Avoiding Entitlement and Pressure in Relationships 04:37 Conclusion and Listener Engagement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, hosted by sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman, guest Joan Price discusses her book 'Sex After Grief.' Joan shares her personal journey of rekindling her sexual life after the loss of her beloved Robert. She emphasizes the unique timeline every individual experiences in returning to sexual pleasure post-grief and addresses common challenges, such as the misconception of betraying a lost partner, societal judgments, and the importance of clear communication with new partners. Joan also highlights various strategies for rediscovering sexuality, including erotic massage and finding a 'pilot light lover.' She offers actionable advice and sample scripts for coping with external pressures and finding supportive communities. The episode aims to provide valuable insights and hope for those navigating their sexuality after loss. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:47 Welcoming Joan Price: Sex and Aging 02:05 Sex After Grief: Joan's Journey 03:32 Navigating Sexuality After Loss 06:38 Challenges and Misconceptions 11:21 Reconnecting with Sexuality 16:00 Online Dating and Finding Connection 19:25 Navigating Conversations About Future Relationships 21:01 Recognizing Readiness for New Relationships 22:58 Handling External Opinions and Advice 25:14 Addressing Sexuality in Grief Support Groups 28:43 The Role of Erotic Massage in Healing 31:15 Reconnecting with Past Lovers 34:39 Promoting the Book and Final Thoughts Bio: Joan Price calls herself an advocate for ageless sexuality. She has been called other things by the media: “senior sexpert,” “the woman leading a sex revolution for seniors,” and—her favorite—“wrinkly sex kitten.” Joan is the author of four books about sexuality, including the award-winning and newly updated Sex after Grief: Navigating Your Sexuality after Losing Your Beloved and Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex, recently chosen by the New York Times as one of the eight best books about sex. An internationally popular public speaker and sex educator, Joan, now 82, has been writing and speaking about senior sex since 2005. Find Joan’s books, tips, webinars, and blog—including her sex toy reviews from a senior perspective!—at https://joanprice.com/. In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, hosted by sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman, guest Joan Price discusses her book 'Sex After Grief.' Joan shares her personal journey of rekindling her sexual life after the loss of her beloved Robert. She emphasizes the unique timeline every individual experiences in returning to sexual pleasure post-grief and addresses common challenges, such as the misconception of betraying a lost partner, societal judgments, and the importance of clear communication with new partners. Joan also highlights various strategies for rediscovering sexuality, including erotic massage and finding a 'pilot light lover.' She offers actionable advice and sample scripts for coping with external pressures and finding supportive communities. The episode aims to provide valuable insights and hope for those navigating their sexuality after loss. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:47 Welcoming Joan Price: Sex and Aging 02:05 Sex After Grief: Joan's Journey 03:32 Navigating Sexuality After Loss 06:38 Challenges and Misconceptions 11:21 Reconnecting with Sexuality 16:00 Online Dating and Finding Connection 19:25 Navigating Conversations About Future Relationships 21:01 Recognizing Readiness for New Relationships 22:58 Handling External Opinions and Advice 25:14 Addressing Sexuality in Grief Support Groups 28:43 The Role of Erotic Massage in Healing 31:15 Reconnecting with Past Lovers 34:39 Promoting the Book and Final Thoughts Bio: Joan Price calls herself an advocate for ageless sexuality. She has been called other things by the media: “senior sexpert,” “the woman leading a sex revolution for seniors,” and—her favorite—“wrinkly sex kitten.” Joan is the author of four books...

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman explores the common misunderstanding surrounding lower desire partners in relationships. She discusses how a lack of evident effort towards sexual intimacy problems is often misinterpreted as indifference. Jessa explains that it's more about a lack of hope and feeling stuck rather than a lack of care. The episode provides insightful reframing strategies for higher desire partners, emphasizing understanding and teamwork to address intimate relationship challenges. Listeners are encouraged to connect to the idea that change is possible and to approach these issues with optimism and shared goals. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 01:02 Understanding Lower Desire Partners 03:21 The Importance of Hope in Sexual Relationships 04:11 Encouragement and Resources 04:28 Conclusion and Listener Engagement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes Junvi Ola, who shares her personal story of overcoming vaginismus, a condition that prevented her from having intercourse until the age of 36. Junvi discusses her journey, which included working with a sex therapist, using dilators, and eventually hiring a surrogate partner. The episode provides insights and inspiration for those facing similar struggles, highlighting the bravery and determination required to break through such challenges. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 01:46 Junvi's Personal Story Begins 02:30 The Impact of Early Experiences 03:42 Struggles with Intimacy and Seeking Help 06:09 Discovering Vaginismus 07:46 Therapy and Overcoming Mental Barriers 14:28 Exploring Sex Surrogacy 19:37 Choosing a Therapist 19:53 The Triad Therapy Experience 20:42 Invitation to Share Your Story 21:11 Overcoming Fear and Dilator Use 22:16 First Steps with the Surrogate Partner 23:18 Sensate Touching and Emotional Challenges 24:22 The Turning Point 25:43 Achieving Penetration 28:25 Focusing on Pleasure and Education 32:03 Reflecting on the Journey 34:07 Normalizing Vaginismus and Surrogate Use 38:02 Final Thoughts and Encouragement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this soapbox episode of 'The Better Sex Podcast,' sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman emphasizes the importance of talking about sex more openly. Jessa explores the cultural taboo surrounding discussions about sex and how it leads to feelings of isolation and shame. Sharing her personal experiences and observations, she highlights the common struggles couples face and encourages listeners to initiate conversations about sex with their partners and friends. By normalizing these discussions, Jessa argues, people can alleviate feelings of inadequacy and seek the support they need. The episode ends with a challenge for listeners to talk about sex with at least one person in the coming week. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:58 The Taboo of Talking About Sex 01:10 Real-Life Conversations and Observations 02:50 Common Struggles in Sexual Relationships 04:18 Encouragement to Open Up 05:31 Conclusion and Call to Action Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman is joined by psychiatrist Dr. Hector Rodriguez to discuss the effects of trauma on sexual desire, libido, pleasure, and satisfaction. Dr. Rodriguez shares insights on how trauma can impact intimate relationships and how the brain can be rewired to facilitate healing and enjoyment of sex. He dives into the role of dopamine and oxytocin, the difference in trauma's impact on individuals, and how simple actions like hugging and handholding can promote healing. The episode highlights the importance of understanding and caring for the brain to improve overall sexual wellness. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:52 Guest Introduction: Dr. Hector Rodriguez on Trauma and Sexual Health 01:40 Understanding Trauma and Its Impact on Intimacy 03:44 Brain Patterns and Trauma Responses 05:39 Trauma's Effect on Sexual Wellness 08:52 The Brain's Role in Desire and Intimacy 11:18 Self-Soothing and Healthy Sexual Practices 12:23 Quizzes for Better Intimacy 12:50 Trauma and Self-Soothing Behaviors 13:49 Integrating Dopamine and Life Management 14:59 Addressing Trauma and Brain Health 16:02 Hope and Brain Scan Validation 18:45 Emotional Intelligence and Forgiveness 19:52 Reconnecting Couples Through Simple Gestures 23:00 Understanding the Brain's Complexity 24:18 Resources and Final Thoughts Take any of my quizzes at https://www.intimacywithease.com Bio: Dr. Hector Rodriguez is a psychiatrist, brain expert, and speaker specializing in trauma, brain health, and sexual wellness. With a background in neuroscience, advanced brain imaging, and lifestyle psychiatry, he helps people reframe struggles with intimacy, libido, and confidence through both science and soul. Known for his unapologetic yet compassionate approach, Dr. Hector blends trauma-informed care with practical strategies for resilience, emotional intelligence, and thriving relationships. His core message is simple: you’re not broken — you’re wired to survive, and you can rewire to thrive. www.whitebutterflyclinic.com Doctor_hector Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman discusses the common issue of differences in sexual desire among couples. She emphasizes the importance of open communication and partnership when addressing this issue, rather than resorting to quick fixes like CBD gummies or sex toys without mutual consent. Jessa explains why these well-intentioned solutions often backfire and are perceived as pressure or blame. Instead, she encourages couples to work together in improving their intimate relationship through shared responsibility and understanding. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:45 Today's Topic: Enhancing Desire in Relationships 01:15 Case Study: Alcohol and Connection 02:09 The Trap of Quick Fixes 02:47 The Importance of Communication 04:10 Working Together as a Team 05:29 Conclusion and Listener Engagement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews Dr. Jacquie Del Rosario about the invasive impact of technology on relationships. They discuss how excessive screen time can weaken intimacy and emotional connections, and how couples can set boundaries to deepen their face-to-face interactions. Dr. Del Rosario shares insights on how technology has altered dating and wooing practices, the importance of intentional communication, and strategies for couples to reconnect. They also touch on the challenges of addressing a partner's technology use and the benefits of seeking professional help to maintain a healthy relationship. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:47 Impact of Technology on Relationships 04:04 Challenges of Modern Dating 07:44 Maintaining Connection in the Digital Age 13:16 Setting Boundaries for Better Intimacy 15:12 The Impact of Technology on Intimacy 15:38 Introduction to Jess and Her Services 16:06 Setting Boundaries with Technology 17:07 The Importance of Face-to-Face Communication 20:08 Using Conversation Cards to Reconnect 22:17 Leveraging Technology Positively 23:26 Addressing Technology Concerns with Your Partner 26:35 The Role of Professional Help in Relationships 29:00 Dr. Jacquie's Trauma Treatment Cohort 30:45 Conclusion and Contact Information Work with Jessa? Visit https://www.intimacywithease.com Bio: Dr. Jacquie’s meteoric rise into the relationship and marriage arena has deemed her America's Marriage Coach™. Her magnetic appeal and practical solutions to relatable issues captivates her audiences worldwide. Dr. Jacquie’s mantra derives from the idea that the foundation of any society starts within an individual’s home. For the past 20 years, Dr. Jacquie has evangelized couples everywhere with her philosophy of the seven pillars of compatibility. She has engineered a host of tools to cultivate healthy relationships and marriage. These tools include: Curricula, The Marriage University, Best Marriage Keys, and created the Compatibility Quiz. In addition to this curricula, Dr. Jacquie hosts conferences and intensive trainings that provide skill-based learning that induces a shift in trajectories. drjacquie.com @askdrjacquie Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass