Better Sex

Why do women fake orgasm — and what does it really mean for the relationship? In this video, we dive deep into the real reasons women pretend to climax, from avoiding conflict and protecting their partner’s ego to feeling pressure to “perform.” You’ll learn what’s actually happening beneath the surface, why faking it can create emotional distance, and how couples can rebuild honesty, safety, and genuine pleasure in bed. If you’ve ever wondered: Why do women fake orgasm even when they love their partner? What does it say about desire, communication, or compatibility? How can couples start having real, connected sex again? This conversation will help you understand the dynamics at play — and how to shift from performance to true intimacy. Listen now to explore the psychology behind why women fake orgasm, and how both partners can move toward honesty, ease, and real satisfaction. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:56 Why Women Fake Orgasms 03:09 The Cost of Faking Orgasms 04:21 How to Address Faking Orgasms with Your Partner 04:55 A Real-Life Example 06:44 Encouragement for Open Communication 07:46 Conclusion and Listener Engagement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

Should You Take HRT? | Hormone Replacement, Menopause & Perimenopause Explained Are you navigating perimenopause or menopause and wondering, “should I take HRT?” In this video, Dr. Sarah Daccarett and I break down hormone replacement therapy (HRT), how it works, risks, benefits, and who might be a good candidate. We also explore the hormonal shifts during perimenopause and menopause, and ways to manage symptoms naturally (or with medical support). Topics covered include: What HRT is and how it replaces lost estrogen and progesterone Typical symptoms of perimenopause and menopause (hot flashes, low libido, mood swings, vaginal dryness) Pros and cons of taking hormone replacement therapy Different HRT options: bioidentical vs. synthetic, delivery methods (pills, patches, creams) Underlying health factors to consider (heart health, cancer risk, bone density) Signs that HRT may be helpful — and when to avoid it Complementary strategies: diet, lifestyle, herbal supports, stress reduction How to talk to your doctor about HRT and make an informed decision If you're asking, “Is it safe? Will it help me feel like myself again?” — this is the conversation for you. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:51 Guest Introduction: Dr. Sarah Dakkar on Hormone Balance 01:32 Dr. Dakkar's Journey into Hormone Therapy 02:11 Understanding Hormone Imbalances 03:24 Challenges and Misconceptions in Hormone Therapy 05:14 Common Hormone Imbalances and Their Effects 12:21 Environmental and Lifestyle Factors 18:15 Sexual Health and Hormone Imbalances 20:37 The Role of Estrogen in Women's Health 21:56 Challenges Women Face with Medical Professionals 23:04 Effective Hormone Replacement Therapy 25:41 Understanding Individualized Treatment 29:41 Risks and Benefits of HRT 34:45 Product Information and Accessibility 37:03 Conclusion and Resources Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

Can a Sexless Marriage Be Happy? | Understanding Low Desire, Intimacy, and Relationship Satisfaction Can a marriage without sex still be a happy one? In this episode, we explore what it really means to be in a sexless marriage—from couples who are mutually content without sex to those where one partner feels lonely, rejected, or frustrated. We’ll look at the common reasons for a sexless marriage, including conflict, emotional distance, mismatched libidos, sexual dysfunction, trauma, menopause, and avoidance patterns that quietly erode connection over time. You’ll learn practical steps to rebuild intimacy, overcome sexual avoidance, and start creating a healthy, fulfilling sexual relationship again. And for those facing a partner who’s unwilling to address the issue, we’ll talk about what it means to choose happiness, fulfillment, and self-respect—whether or not the sexual dynamic ever changes. If you’ve ever wondered whether love can last without sex—or how to bring desire back when it’s faded—this conversation is for you. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:58 Can You Be Happy in a Sexless Marriage? 01:47 Understanding the Causes of a Sexless Marriage 02:27 Addressing Sexual Avoidance and Rebuilding Intimacy 05:26 When One Partner is Unwilling to Work on the Relationship 06:03 Making the Final Decision 07:36 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman welcomes Dr. Winnifred Cutler to discuss her extensive research on pheromones and their impact on human sexuality. Dr. Cutler, a passionate researcher, shares her journey from psychology graduate student to becoming a leading expert in the field of pheromones. The conversation covers the history of pheromones, the different types, and their effects on human attraction, fertility, and romantic behavior. Dr. Cutler also highlights her development of pheromone products and shares testimonials of their impactful use. Tune in to learn about pheromones' scientific basis and their potential to enhance intimate relationships. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:53 Guest Introduction: Dr. Winnifred Cutler 01:53 Dr. Cutler's Journey into Pheromone Research 03:33 Understanding Pheromones 04:54 Types of Pheromones 07:17 Sex Attractant Pheromones 10:57 Developing Pheromone Products 13:32 Testing and Results 18:59 Pheromones for Men 21:37 Chemical Compounds and Romantic Gestures 21:56 Tracking Sexual Behaviors 24:04 Testimonials and Effects of Pheromones 26:32 Natural Production of Pheromones 29:50 Pheromones and Same-Sex Attraction 30:58 Global Reach and Customer Insights 33:57 Impact of Pheromones in Academic Settings 38:48 Athena Institute and Women's Health 40:35 Conclusion and Podcast Information Jessa's desire discrepancy resources can be found at https://www.desirediscrepancy.com Bio: Dr. Winnifred Cutler, B.S. in Psychology cum laude from Ursinus College in 1973, earned her Ph.D. in Biology from the University of Pennsylvania in 1979 followed by postdoctoral work in behavioral endocrinology at Stanford University. In 1985 she co-founded the Women's Wellness Program at the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania. She has published over 50 scientific papers, is co-inventor on 5 patents and author of eight books on women's health translated into 7 languages - including the 2020 (3rd) edition of Love Cycles: The Science of Intimacy chronicling both her discovery of Human Pheromones and development of successful formulas as well as her book, Hormones and Your Health: The Smart Woman's Guide to Hormonal and Alternative Therapies for Menopause with essential information for women over age 35 to achieve their 'personal-best' health. Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the crucial role of experiential practice in improving intimate relationships. She underscores the importance of embodying the knowledge gained through communication, challenging myths about sex, and understanding desire. Drawing on her Intimacy With Ease Method, Zimmerman highlights the need for hands-on experiences to truly transform one's sex life. Listeners are provided with valuable resources and are encouraged to actively practice the concepts discussed to achieve meaningful change in their intimate lives. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 01:02 The Importance of Experiential Practice 01:21 The Intimacy with Ease Method 02:55 Practical Exercises and Analogies 03:39 The Giver Receiver Exercise 04:39 The Role of Experiential Learning in Sex Therapy 05:35 Resources and Conclusion Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman addresses the challenging topic of how to approach your partner about going to sex therapy. Drawing from her experience with clients, Jessa provides valuable insights on framing the conversation in a positive light. She emphasizes the importance of mutual cooperation and understanding, and the need to avoid blame or shame when discussing sexual concerns. Jessa offers practical advice on breaking down barriers and seeking professional help to improve intimacy and strengthen relationships. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:51 Discussing Sex Therapy with Your Partner 02:24 Understanding Both Partners' Perspectives 03:43 Approaching the Conversation Positively 05:04 Conclusion and Additional Resources Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman is joined by Rob Kancler to discuss the potential for human sexual experience and the steps needed to enhance intimate relationships. Rob shares insights on how individuals often start with the wrong paradigm about sex and offers practical strategies to think differently about sexual fulfillment, connect with partners, and achieve true intimacy. He delves into the importance of downregulating the nervous system, using body intelligence over cognition, and the integration of ancient sexual traditions. The episode also covers practical exercises like 'belly to belly' and other co-regulation techniques that couples can implement to improve their sex lives. Rob emphasizes that sexual mastery can lead to overall personal development, enhancing one's life and relationships. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:50 Exploring Human Sexual Experience with Rob K. 01:20 Rob K.'s Journey and Passion 03:52 Defining Sexual Fulfillment 04:14 Theories on Sexuality and Orgasm 06:21 Masculine and Feminine Sexual Needs 09:39 The Role of Intuition in Sexuality 17:16 Body Intelligence vs. Cognition 26:12 Practical Exercises for Intimacy 30:37 Understanding Sexual Operating Systems 33:01 Unlocking Hidden Potential: Pelvic Work and Sexual Shame 33:56 The Need for Cultural Change in Sexual Health 35:04 Misconceptions About Sexual Exploration 38:18 The Path to Sexual Mastery: Programs and Processes 39:48 The Importance of Integrity and Responsibility in Relationships 42:02 Exploring Masculine Sexual Expression and Group Learning 43:31 Personal Journey and Overcoming Sexual Shame 44:13 The Three Levels of Sexual Mastery Programs 47:33 Final Thoughts and Contact Information 49:18 Practical Exercises for Couples 52:18 The Science of Connection and Entrainment Bio: Rob Kancler is an artist, athlete, entrepreneur, and modern mystic. He runs Men of Substance™, a sexual mastery program serving men worldwide. His revolutionary work gives all people access to the profound sexual experiences hidden in the most obscure spiritual traditions—radically expanding a conversation most people take for granted and revealing the blind spots about sex that everyone carries but no one sees. The truth is this quietly keeps men and women from the confidence, vitality, love, meaning, and deeper fulfillment available in every part of life. Check him out at robkancler.com, take the free assessment at bedroomcompass.com, or explore the foundational Men of Substance™ program at robkancler.com/blueprint. www.robkancler.com Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the importance of moving away from a goal-oriented, all-or-nothing approach to sex. She explains how this mindset can be a barrier for partners with "reactive" desire, and offers alternative metaphors like viewing sex as a playground or a tapas bar, where the focus is on enjoyment and exploration rather than completion. Jessa emphasizes that this shift can help reduce the pressure and improve intimacy within relationships. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:49 The All-or-Nothing Approach to Sex 03:36 Changing the Perspective: Metaphors for Better Intimacy 05:37 Conclusion and Listener Engagement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host, and sex therapist, Jessa Zimmerman, talks to therapist Tom Bruett about the unique aspects and challenges of gay male relationships and sex life. Tom discusses the nuances of gay relationships, including the impact of heteronormative upbringing, the importance of differentiation, and specific sexual education needs. They explore the developmental stages of queer relationships and how to maintain vibrant intimacy and connection over time. The discussion also touches on the role of monogamy, agreements in relationships, and practical advice for enhancing sexual experiences. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:48 Guest Introduction: Tom Bruett on Gay Relationships 01:41 Challenges and Opportunities in Gay Relationships 03:51 Sexual Differentiation and Communication 10:50 Developmental Stages in Queer Relationships 14:30 Monogamy and Agreements in Gay Relationships 19:28 Keeping the Spark Alive in Monogamous Relationships 22:38 Resources and Conclusion You can find all of Jessa's desire discrepancy resources at https://www.desirediscrepancy.com Bio; Tom Bruett, LMFT is a therapist, trainer, consultant, and author who works extensively with the queer community. He is the founder of the Queer Relationship Institute, which provides therapy for queer folx and training for therapists who work with queer relationships. Tom has trained under Drs. Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson in the Developmental Model of Relationship Therapy, which he now trains other therapists in. His book The Go-To Relationship Guide for Gay Men: From Honeymoon to Lasting Commitment is published by JKP. In his downtime, he loves theatre, travel, and collaborating with his partner to keep their rescue dog, Millie, from causing too much mischief. Instagram: @QueerRelationshipInstitute Website: www.QueerRelationshipInstitute.com Book: The Go To Relationship Guide for Gay Men www.thequeerrelationshipinstitute.com Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman delves into the importance of being able to say 'no' in intimate relationships. She discusses how the ability to decline is crucial for fostering a healthy and enjoyable sex life, free from distress and negative experiences. Through a session example and advice for both partners, she explains the positive impact that setting boundaries can have on mutual satisfaction. Listeners are encouraged to understand the difference between a definitive 'no' and a potential 'maybe,' and to use these insights to improve their intimate connections. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:47 The Importance of Saying No 01:12 Client Case Study: The Consequences of Not Saying No 04:30 Exploring the Maybe: When to Say Yes 06:56 Encouragement and Final Thoughts 08:06 Closing Remarks and Listener Engagement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the 'Better Sex' podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman talks with Dr. Susie Gronski about the role of pelvic floor physical therapy for men, particularly focusing on pelvic pain. Dr. Gronski shares her journey into the field, driven by the courage of men seeking help for pelvic issues amidst a healthcare landscape that often overlooks male pelvic floor therapy. They discuss common conditions treated by pelvic floor physical therapy, such as erectile dysfunction, incontinence, and chronic pelvic pain syndromes. The discussion delves into the biopsychosocial approach to diagnosis and treatment, emphasizing the integration of physical, emotional, and social factors. Dr. Gronski explains the examination process, stressing the importance of creating a comfortable and safe environment for patients. The episode highlights the need for increased awareness and tailored care for men’s pelvic health. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:48 Exploring Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy for Men 01:59 Guest Introduction: Dr. Susie Gronski 03:55 Understanding Pelvic Pain in Men 04:49 Causes and Symptoms of Pelvic Pain 13:48 Emotional and Psychological Factors 19:08 Role of Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy 20:55 Understanding Pain and Its Role 21:38 Empowering Through Knowledge and Experience 22:56 Clinical Philosophy and Movement-Based Therapy 24:07 Touch Therapy and Sensory Integration 25:41 Creating a Safe and Collaborative Environment 26:32 The Initial Exam Process 28:12 Detailed Examination and Patient Comfort 30:07 Addressing Patient Concerns and Misconceptions 34:46 Finding and Connecting with Dr. Susie G 35:36 Conclusion and Listener Engagement Take Jessa's quiz at https://www.sexlifequiz.com Bio: With over a decade of expertise in pelvic and sexual health, Dr. Susie Gronski is a Licensed Doctor of Physical Therapy, Pelvic Health Specialist, AASECT Certified Sex Counselor and Educator, and the founder of a multidisciplinary pelvic health clinic in Asheville, North Carolina. As a leading influencer and content creator on YouTube, she educates and empowers individuals by addressing taboo pelvic and sexual health topics, actively working to dispel misinformation. To learn more about her and her team, visit drsusieg.com. https://drsusieg.com/ https://www.youtube.com/@DrSusieGronski patreon.com/drsusieg Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of Better Sex, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman tackles one of the most common and vulnerable questions: “Is there hope for my sex life?” Jessa explores the roots of hopelessness in intimate relationships, explains how communication and teamwork can reignite connection, and shares practical strategies for couples to rediscover joy and fulfillment in their sex lives. Whether you’re struggling with mismatched desire, stress, or just feeling stuck, this episode offers hope, insight, and actionable advice. [0:46] Common concerns: Feeling hopeless about sex and relationship struggles. [1:18] The foundation of hope: Love, friendship, and goodwill in relationships. [1:43] Communication and teamwork as keys to improvement. [2:17] Avoiding polarization: Working together against the problem. [2:41] Redefining sex: Moving beyond rigid expectations and goal orientation. [3:29] The stress of goal-oriented sex and how to shift perspective. [4:24] Two types of sexual desire: Proactive vs. reactive. [4:42] Understanding and embracing reactive desire. [5:40] Building hope: Challenging assumptions and valuing both partners’ experiences. [6:17] Introducing the “How Big a Problem Is My Sex Life?” quiz. [6:45] Using the quiz to assess your relationship and find hope. [7:08] Encouragement and support for finding hope in your sex life. [7:21] Outro: Where to find more resources and episodes. [7:36] Thank you message and invitation for feedback and reviews. [7:56] Closing credits and theme music. Take the quiz: https://www.sexlifequiz.com Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, hosted by sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman, the guest is Stephanie Konter-O'Hara, a therapist and mother of a 19-month-old baby. Stephanie shares her personal and professional insights on how having children can impact sex life and intimate relationships. Key topics discussed include the physical, emotional, and relational challenges faced by new parents, the misconceptions around postpartum recovery, the perimenopausal state induced by breastfeeding, and the importance of communication and shared values in maintaining intimacy. Stephanie also talks about the role of compassion, understanding, and seeking therapy when necessary, to navigate the complex dynamics of parenting and relationships. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:49 Guest Introduction: Stephanie Konter-O'Hara 01:22 Personal Story and Passion for Sexual Health 03:21 Physical and Emotional Challenges Postpartum 04:00 Common Barriers to Postpartum Intimacy 08:42 Relational Dynamics and Mental Load 24:31 Communication and Compassion in Relationships 26:44 Seeking Help and Resources 27:54 Conclusion and Contact Information Want to share your story on the podcast? It can be anonymous! Email us at info@intimacywithease.com Bio: Stephanie Konter-O'Hara, LPC, ACS is passionate about making space in the world for everyone to be themselves and live in the most connected and authentic way that they can. She is a Mom, Podcaster, Licensed Mental Health Therapist, and a Group Practice Owner in Colorado. She is originally from the East coast and enjoys living out West where its a bit more peaceful and can spend most of the year enjoying the outdoors. When Stephanie is most joyous and free she is spending time with her friends, family (including her daughter), and her dogs. She truly loves to help people explore their relationships with themselves and believes that we should all surround ourselves with more opportunities to connect with our village. www.wellmindedcounseling.com Workbook: Becoming Mommy https://a.co/d/d6EGJ1K Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of 'Better Sex,' host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman discusses the common issue of being overly focused on pleasing one's partner in a sexual relationship. She explores how this can lead to unintended pressure, diminishing genuine intimacy and connection. Through examples from her client interactions, Jessa illustrates how detaching from the expectation of sexual pleasure and being genuinely receptive to a partner's desires can enhance the relationship. Key strategies include slowing down, truly listening to one's partner, and honoring their current wants and needs, whether they are sexual or not. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 01:01 The Pitfalls of Wanting to Please Your Partner 02:19 Understanding Your Partner's Desires 03:19 Practical Tips for Improving Intimacy 05:34 Conclusion and Listener Engagement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jessa Zimmerman speaks with ASSECT certified sex therapist Vanessa Cushing about her new innovative project, Sex Therapy Pro—an online closed AI resource and soon-to-be app. They discuss the challenges and accessibility gaps in sexual health information, Vanessa's journey through the creation of this custom AI, and how it aims to provide vetted, accurate information to individuals and other clinicians. They also cover the importance of trauma-informed care, the limitations of AI in handling mental health, and the ultimate goal of encouraging people to seek professional help while reducing shame around sexual health concerns. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:46 Guest Introduction: Vanessa Cushing 01:56 The Birth of Sex Therapy Pro 03:23 Challenges and Solutions in Sex Therapy 04:22 AI in Sex Therapy: Benefits and Concerns 06:48 Accessibility and Inclusivity in Sexual Health 11:05 Trauma-Informed AI and Its Limitations 14:25 Future of AI in Therapy 21:05 Conclusion and App Launch Details Take my sexual health quiz at https://www.sexhealthquiz.com Bio: Vanessa Cushing, MS, LPC, NCC is a sex therapist certified by University of Michigan, trauma-informed clinician, and the founder of Sex Therapy Pro a digital platform offering AI-guided, shame-free support for sexual wellness and intimacy. She holds a BA in Psychology from the University of Virginia, an MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Johns Hopkins University, and completed her sex therapy certification through the University of Michigan. Vanessa specializes in helping individuals and couples navigate sexual pain, desire discrepancies, trauma recovery, and communication breakdowns and now brings that expertise to a scalable, tech-powered format aimed at making healing more accessible than ever. Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of The Better Sex Podcast, host and sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman explores what it truly means to have a healthy sex life. She challenges the common misconception that frequency alone defines a healthy sexual relationship and discusses the importance of mutual enjoyment, desire, engagement, and presence. Zimmerman also talks about the signs of an unhealthy sex life, such as sexual avoidance and lack of communication, and emphasizes the need for a fun and easy sexual relationship that works for both partners. Listeners are invited to take a comprehensive quiz to assess the health of their own sex life and get personalized tips for improvement. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:58 Defining a Healthy Sex Life 02:30 Key Elements of a Healthy Sex Life 03:16 The Sexual Avoidance Cycle 03:39 Positivity and Desire in Sexual Relationships 04:19 Presence and Intentionality 05:43 Conclusion and Quiz Invitation 06:10 Closing Remarks and Listener Engagement Take the quiz at https://www.sexhealthquiz.com Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of the Better Sex Podcast, host Jess Zimmerman speaks with Lilith Foxx and Remi Newman about their new anthology, 'Hands-On.' The book is a collection of stories from sex workers that highlight the compassion, connection, and healing found in their work. The guests elaborate on the misconceptions surrounding sex work, the role of social justice, and their personal journeys within the profession. Lilith shares her empowering experience as a former sex worker and educator, while Remi details her path as a surrogate partner. The episode emphasizes the emotional and physical healing that sex work can provide and advocates for a broader understanding and acceptance of this profession. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex Podcast 00:52 Sound Issues and Guest Introduction 01:53 The Origin of 'Hands-On' Anthology 04:17 Lilith Foxx's Journey and Passion 06:07 Social Justice and Sex Work 07:08 Misconceptions About Sex Work 08:40 Personal Stories of Entering Sex Work 14:15 Support from Loved Ones 16:58 Ethics and Sex Work 19:11 Healing Through Sex Work 22:34 Reflecting on Personal Growth and Experience 23:05 Exploring the Reasons Behind Seeking Surrogate Partners and Pro Dom Services 23:39 The Role of Companionship and Loneliness in Seeking Services 24:33 Shame and Vulnerability in Kink and Fetish Work 25:21 Drivers for Seeking Surrogate Partner Therapy 29:05 The Importance of Boundaries and Therapist Involvement 30:41 Reading an Excerpt: Holding Hands 37:54 Book Information and Closing Remarks Bios: Lilith Foxx (she/her) is a BIPOC, queer, neurodivergent, kinky and polyamorous marketing professional turned Board-certified sexologist, AASECT Certified Sexuality Educator, professional speaker, coach, and inclusivity consultant. She is a graduate of the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University’s Human Sexuality Intensive program, and is certified by Johns Hopkins University in psychological first aid. She is currently pursuing a master's degree in Public Health. Her work focuses on the intersectionality of marginalized identities, alternative sexuality, and social justice. Informed by her personal and professional experiences, she provides BDSM and nonmonogamy cultural competency consulting for clinical, academic, and research settings, and facilitates workshops on sexuality justice and inclusion. Her expertise has been featured in several publications including Cosmopolitan, Glamour, HuffPost, Kinkly, GQ, Playboy, Men's Health, and in LiveJasmin's 'Life in Red' docu-series. Remi Newman is a sexuality educator, writer and surrogate partner. She is the editor of the new anthology Hands On: Stories of Sexuality Work, Intimacy, and Healing. Remi has over 25 years working in the field of sexuality empowering people of diverse backgrounds to live healthy and fulfilling sex lives. She received her Master's in sexuality education from NYU. She is the proud mama of a teenage son, three naughty kitties and two adventurous crayfish. Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of Better Sex, sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman dives into the concept of anger as a secondary emotion. She discusses how anger often masks more vulnerable feelings like fear, sadness, hurt, and shame. Zimmerman explains the importance of identifying and expressing these underlying emotions for better intimate relationships and effective communication. Listeners are encouraged to reflect on their true feelings to foster empathy and connection with their partners. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 00:50 Understanding Anger as a Secondary Emotion 02:00 Exploring the Emotions Underneath Anger 03:26 Practical Steps to Address Anger 05:11 Conclusion and Listener Engagement Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass

In this episode of Better Sex, host Jessa Zimmerman interviews Dr. Nicole Thompson about her journey from purity culture to sexual liberation, focusing on how psychedelics can aid in this transition. They discuss the impact of purity culture, the importance of community, and the principles of set and setting in psychedelic-assisted therapy. Nicole shares her experiences and insights on how to use psychedelics to enhance sexual pleasure and dismantle shame. They also touch on the significance of communication, consent, and the importance of feeling safe in sexual experiences. 00:00 Introduction to Better Sex 01:01 Guest Introduction: Nicole Thompson on Sexual Liberation 01:56 Nicole's Journey from Purity Culture to Sexual Freedom 03:05 Challenges and Transformations in Sexual Liberation 06:01 Therapeutic Approaches and Sexual Healing 14:41 Exploring Psychedelic Integration in Therapy 17:14 Creating a Safe and Intentional Space for Psychedelic Therapy 18:36 The Importance of Graduated Dosages in Psychedelic and Sexual Experiences 20:18 Applying Set and Setting to Sexual Liberation 22:04 The Role of Community and Safe Practices in Psychedelic and Sexual Experiences 25:08 Recognizing Boundaries and Red Flags in Sexual Relationships 27:33 The Power of Communication and Integration in Sexual Experiences 29:52 Hopes for the Future: Ending Rape Culture and Closing the Orgasm Gap 32:19 Resources and Final Thoughts Visit https://www.intimacywithease.com if you'd like to explore how to work with me. Guest bio: Nicole is a queer Sex and Relationships psychotherapist and the host of the Modern Anarchy podcast. She’s the author of The Psychedelic Jealousy Guide: Crafting Secure Non-Monogamous Relationships and conducted the first published academic study on Relationship Anarchy. Nicole is widely recognized as a leading theorist on non-monogamy and sexuality. Through her private client work with The Pleasure Practice, she helps people liberate pleasure, navigate desire, and create deeply connected relationships rooted in authenticity and expansion. www.modernanarchypodcast.com Want to learn more about my sponsored charity? Charity: Water is committed to providing clean water to every human on the planet, 100% of your contribution will be used directly for water projects around the globe. You can learn more at https://www.bettersexpodcast.com/water. More info and resources: Secret Podcast for the Higher Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/hdppodcast Secret Podcast for the Lower Desire Partner: https://www.intimacywithease.com/ldppodcast How Big a Problem is Your Sex Life? Quiz – https://www.sexlifequiz.com The Course – https://www.intimacywithease.com The Book – https://www.sexwithoutstress.com Podcast Website – https://www.intimacywithease.com Access the Free webinar: Intimacy Made Easy: 3 Secrets to Bridging Libido Differences: https://intimacywithease.com/masterclass