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Savage Lovecast

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Seattle, WA


Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit and get yourself a season subscription.




Savage Love Episode 569

This show begins and ends with circumcision. A woman is dating her first uncut man and wonders if Dan has any... tips. Then, at the end of the Magnum, an uncut man who is into "pig play" (that's dick-stank- you're welcome,) wonders if he should get himself an adult circumcision. So there's that to ponder. A high school teacher and her pal wonder why the kids are so into hickeys. On the Magnum, Dan chats with Slate writer Mark Joseph Stern, about the infuriating phenomenon of left wing...

Duration: 00:56:02

Savage Love Episode 568

A woman offers proof that sexual harassment is about power. One of her students, a gay man, sexually harasses her regularly. Why would he do this? A fetish too far: A woman's boyfriend can only get off if they are doing play simulating kidnapping, bondage and human trafficking. She broke up with him because she just couldn't go there all the time. But now he feels shamed. Poor baby. Dan welcomes comedian Amy Miller to talk about the inadvisability of fucking comedians. Also, hear the tale...

Duration: 00:53:17

Savage Love Episode 567

A couple are dismayed that the condom keeps slipping off when they're doing it doggie style. Dan offers some time-honored tricks. Disability Awareness Consultant Adam Gurza, schools us all about dating folks with disabilities. On the Magnum, Dan chats with author Jesse Bering about penis size and natural selection. Science! And speaking of penises, can you pump that thing up and make it bigger in the same way you can stretch an earlobe? 206-302-2064 Today's episode of the Lovecast is...

Duration: 00:49:47

Savage Love Episode 566

We start the show with a cavalcade of yucky calls about Nazis! Can a dom command his sub to come? Does this really happen? On the Magnum, Dan answers a bunch of calls from parents of teens with Deb Hauser, President of Advocates for Youth. 206-302-2064 Today’s episode is also brought to you by Blue Apron- the delivery service that sends you fresh ingredients and incredible recipes so you can make fabulous meals at home. Check out this week’s menu and get your first 3 meals free by going to...

Duration: 00:46:52

Savage Love Episode 565

What do you do when your best friend is dating a con man? A woman has been with her boyfriend for a year. He has a key to her apartment, and regularly lets himself in when she isn't there, even though she told him not to. How big of a problem do we have here? On the Magnum, Dan talks to Alexander Cheves who published a controversial article in The Advocate about what place, if any, women have in gay bars. And, a woman's best friend also happens to be her step-mother. (Same age though.) How...

Duration: 00:47:04

Savage Love Episode 564

A seemingly kind man only gets off when his girlfriend is in pain. She noticed this and plays it up to please him. Don't tell him this, but she isn't in pain. She loves it. But what if her acting skills fail? A woman has started dating a man who travels a lot and has a girlfriend in every city. Should she join his sprawling harem? On the Magnum, Dan interviews Dr. Samantha Joel, in a "What You Got?" about the psychology of what make someone finally decide to end a relationship. And, a...

Duration: 00:48:08

Savage Love Episode 563

On the opening rant: Coming Out 101. What happens next? A mother's pre-teen daughter wants to wear a leather S&M-style choker. How can mom explain why this might not be a good idea? For both the Magnum and the Micro version we were honored to have Dr. Sarah Pentlicky from Planned Parenthood in the studio to answer some gnarly medical questions. Dental dams? Check. Warty dicks? Check. Surf Shorts? Check. Wait, what? As you would expect, she handled them all with supreme calm, poise and...

Duration: 00:50:31

Savage Love Episode 562

If your boyfriend wants you to help him to film women so he can scratch his voyeur itch, is there an ethical way to do this? Hear the sordid tale of the the woman who wants to call Child Protective Services on her own damn boyfriend. On the Magnum, Dan chats with writer and BDSM educator Mollena Williams about "sub space" -what it is, and what it isn't. Also, a woman is getting annoyed that her boyfriend keeps presenting her with highly scripted sex scenarios that probably originated from...

Duration: 00:50:41

Savage Love Episode 561

A gay man hooked up with a hot guy- great lover. But his micro-penis made the caller wonder if his lover was perhaps a transman. Should he ask him? Does it matter? A man's ten year-old son has come out as gay. The worried father bemoans his child's fate living on the "margins of society." Dan issues a reality check and a rebuke. It's 2017 dad, not the 1800s. "Margins of Society" indeed... On the Magnum, Jon Ronson, author of "The Psychopath Test" is on to talk about "bespoke pornography"...

Duration: 00:52:06

Savage Love Episode 560

A man's girlfriend won't let him watch Game of Thrones due to all the violence against women. Does she have the right? Should we all be boycotting the show? Salon's Amanda Marcotte is here to weigh in. A lesbian is exploring dom/sub play with her girlfriend. Her girlfriend wants her to talk dirty and tell her to shut up. But our lesbian feels uncomfortable in their small apartment with thin walls. What's a GGG girl to do? On the Magnum, how much fisting is too much fisting? A University of...

Duration: 00:51:36

Savage Love Episode 559

If your Tinder guy can't get it up, should you move on, or give him a chance? A woman is dating a man 13 years her senior. Is this sort of age difference inherently immoral because...Woody Allen? On the Magnum, a deep dive into trans world with Buck Angel (a.k.a. The Man with a Pussy.) He is simply wonderful, and you must listen. 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Astroglide O- USDA certified organic dual-purpose massage oil and personal lubricant. Try a free sample at...

Duration: 00:49:22

Savage Love Episode 558

A gay marine wants to keep his dick locked up in a chastity cage. His problem is...wait. Isn't that first sentence enough for you? A straight man has noticed that ALL of his friends are into feet. Why would this be? On the Magnum we welcome Mistress Matisse, to talk about her new magical lube. Also with Mistress Matisse, how can you explain the beautiful bruises your dom gives you? 206-302-2064 This episode is also brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30-day trial at

Duration: 00:52:41

Savage Love Episode 557

A man is just about to end his Grindr relationship with a dude whose girlfriend knows nothing of his exploits. Should he drop the info on this poor girl before he leaves town? Dan interviews Seth Davidowitz, author of "Everybody Lies: Big Data, New Data and What the Internet Can Tell Us About Who We Really Are." Basically, when you look at Google searches, people are just as nasty as can be. On the Magnum, Dan chats with Viro, co-host of the furry relationship advice podcast "Feral...

Duration: 00:52:25

Savage Love Episode 556

Wait. Are public orgasms ok now? A man and his girlfriend observed a woman having one, right there, out on the street, in broad daylight. A gay man broke one of his rules. His boyfriend is still closeted to his family, and when they come to town, the caller has to clear out. Can this work? Does he have to break up? On the Magnum, Dan chats with author and editor Michael Hobbes about the particular challenges middle-aged gay men face in dating. Finally... "Hey there, old friend who I used...

Duration: 00:52:38

Savage Love Episode 555

A woman is engaged to be married. She has been with about 80 lovers, and he has never been with anyone but her. He begs her to tell him all about her adventures to the point of obsession. Why does he wants to hear it all, and does she have to tell him? A man with a roommate feels like he's living with our horrible president: i.e. rich, entitled, lazy and mean. How can he convince this brute's girlfriend that she can do better? On the Magnum, a man wishes LA had the kind of kinky parties...

Duration: 00:48:09

Savage Love Episode 554

A woman wants to try a three-way. But all the posts online are riddled with spelling and grammar errors. (Not sexy!) How can she forge a more classy connection? A woman has been with her fiancé for 5 years. He loves to play with her nipples, but she hates it. And guess what? She has never told him this. Before they wed, how can she confess that she's been grinning and bearing it the whole time? On the Magnum, how drunk does a straight boy have to be before he'll get it on with another guy?...

Duration: 00:50:49

Savage Love Episode 553

Oh, that nasty chef! A woman works in a restaurant where her manager is having an affair with the married chef. Sometimes the caller has to serve the chef's poor innocent wife. It's so cruel, that all the servers are about to revolt. A married man harbors a cuckolding fantasy. He is certain his wife would never-ever be into it. But would she? Also, we couldn't help but play a couple of Rachel Lark songs, cuz they're so good. And on the Magnum, have you heard of "Hypersomnia?" A woman can't...

Duration: 00:52:16

Savage Love Episode 552

A straight male weight-lifter likes to shave his chest and pits. His friends are giving him grief about it. How can this sensitive strongman get over the peer pressure and revel in his smooth, lovely body? A gay man's foster son has had a rough life. And now he realizes they are both on Grindr. Awkward? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Nathaniel Frank, author of Awakening: How Gays and Lesbians Brought Marriage Equality to America. And, a woman's sister used to be in an abusive relationship,...

Duration: 00:53:12

Savage Love Episode 551

A man and a woman used to date, but now they're just friends. The woman got married and doesn't want her rich husband to know that she used to date the caller. Is it because she's embarrassed that the caller doesn't make enough money? From three-way to third wheel...a gay man with a long term boyfriend opened up their relationship to bring on another man. But now the boyfriend is getting closer and closer to the new guy. Do we have a problem here? On the Magnum, Dan chats with our go-to...

Duration: 00:54:47

Savage Love Episode 550

A couple of ex-Mormons started dating. He broke up with her because she wasn't "nice." But don't worry everybody- he immediately came back to her. Then he broke up with her because he's gay. But it's ok! He changed his mind on that as well and came back to her. Now he isn't sure if he wants to be with her because of her jealousy issues. Ah, true love. A 13 year-old girl came out as gay to her mother, who easily accepts this. But grandma! She's a big ole Christian homophobe. Should the...

Duration: 00:48:33

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